procyon-podcast-network
Procyon Podcast Network
Welcome to Procyon Podcast Network. PPN’s mission is to produce inclusive podcasts that highlight characters from less represented backgrounds. Our largely-female creative team has a passionate love of storytelling, especially through sound, and we’re invested in telling diverse stories with fresh perspectives on genre fiction.
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This is a reminder that our casting call is closing Saturday June 8th at 11:59pm EST! If you've ever thought about playing a lake monster, a troll, a werebear, or other monster consider auditioning! Find all the information at the link below; we look forward to hearing you!
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It's time! Our crowdfunding campaign for THE FIRST SEASON of Waiting for October starts now! We have until June 2nd to raise $4,000 to cover our budget, and we have so many fun things to share with you between now and then! Join us at https://crowdfundr.com/waitingforoctober
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I feel such a deep soul bond with this image. It is me and I am it
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BOOP!
🐾 BOOP! 🐾
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Because this is a jointly owned tumblr it does not appear I can opt the rest of Procyon into boops by force, but know that I am slapping you with my raccoon paws today. In my heart.
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There's about one week left to audition for one of our PAID LEAD ROLES!
If you've ever wanted to fight a demon at a rest stop, try to tackle an owl, mouth off a god - and of course lots of good good sapphic flirting - YOU SHOULD AUDITION! Come be part of some gay chaos.
CASTING CALL: No Normal Life
Hey everyone. Phoebe and Andrea (of @underpressurepodcast and @meandaupod/@s2s-podcast) have teamed up with the fine folks @thecritshow for a brand new audio drama inspired by the TTRPG Monster of the Week, and we're looking for our lead VAs!
It’s 1991, and Anastacia’s just been given a divine mission: Protect The Chosen One from all monsters, minions and masterminds who would seek to do her harm. Not a bad gig for a twentysomething with anger issues and a magic hammer. There’s only… one little thing…
Lana King, the Chosen One? She’s not just some girl with a magic spear, mysterious visions and a smart mouth. She’s also… pretty cute.
And that’s where things get complicated.
No Normal Life is a 10-episode show about hunting monsters, saving the world one small town at a time, and what happens when the person you swore to protect with your life is also the
person you want to spend your life with.
We'll be recording a pilot episode this May (assuming actor availability), with a Kickstarter to fund the whole series running later this year. All roles are paid.
Full audition information, instructions and sides under the cut, or you can find the PDF instructions to review here.
Questions? You can send 'em to the email in the instructions below, and our inbox is open here too.
No Normal Life Casting Call
A fiction podcast inspired by Monster of the Week and The Critshow
Project Type: Fiction podcast
Length: 1 pilot episode, approx. 30 minutes – 9 additional episodes planned, conditional on successful crowdfunding campaign
Recording location: Remote, synchronous recording preferred. Potential opportunity to record on-location if based near Indianapolis,IN.
Recording period: May of 2024 - adjustable based on performer availability.
Compensation: $100 per episode for lead, $50 for supporting, $25 for minor.
Audition deadline: April 6th, 2024
A podcast-quality microphone and quiet audio setup (no echoes or background noise) is required for this podcast. Your audition tape also serves as an audition for your recording setup/space. If you’re new to this, here are some basic tips to improve your space. Please do not treat or “clean up” your audio before sending, other than choosing which line readings you’d like to send or editing out things like mic bumps.
Please only read the dialogue for the character you are auditioning for in the sides below
.
Please limit your audition to 2 takes of the dialogue and fight audio per character. If auditioning for more than 1 character please create separate audio files for each character.
Please save audition files as wav - with character name, underscore, your first and last name. Example: Lana_PennyHamilton.WAV - and email them to auditions [at] thecritshowpodcast.com by April 6th.
About the show
It’s 1991, and Anastacia’s just been given a divine mission: Protect The Chosen One from all monsters, minions and masterminds who would seek to do her harm. Not a bad gig for a twentysomething with anger issues and a magic hammer. There’s only… one little thing…
Lana King, the Chosen One? She’s not just some girl with a magic spear, mysterious visions and a smart mouth. She’s also… pretty cute.
And that’s where things get complicated.
No Normal Life is a 10-episode show about hunting monsters, saving the world one small town at a time, and what happens when the person you swore to protect with your life is also the person you want to spend your life with.
About us
Rev is the executive producer at Critshow Studios - a small recording studio that specializes in actual play podcasts, Let’s Plays and creator interviews. He is also the host and GM of The Critshow - where we catch glimpses of Anastacia and Lana’s back story where they, as NPCs, help guide the players with their experiences. He is also a director, vocal coach, and acting teacher having worked with companies such as Earplay, Crossroads Repertory Theatre, and many PBS affiliates.
In addition to being fans of the Critshow, Phoebe Seiders and Andrea Klassen are founding members of the audio drama collective Procyon Podcasts. Andrea’s previous audio drama work includes Me and AU, Station to Station and writing for a number of early-season episodes of the app Zombies, Run! Phoebe is a co-creator and writer for the podcast Under Pressure. They also play together in a Regency-themed Monster of the Week home game.
Lana (Lead Role)
Description: Early 20s, can be read as a real All-American-Girl-Next-Door and knows it.
Lana is newer to monster hunting, but already a few encounters deep and a little chippy about the idea that she’s greener than other people in the game. More housebroken (polite, anyway) than Anastacia, but with a strong stubborn streak when she thinks she’s being bossed around or talked down to. The literal Chosen One, though she’s not quite sure what she’s been chosen for… yet.
Reference characters: Buffy Summers by way of Yellowjackets, any of the leads in Bring it On if they fought monsters, Gabrielle from Xena if she were the main lead of the show
Scenes:
Dialogue
LANA and ANASTACIA are on their first real case together – investigating what appears to be the mundane disappearance of a child.
LANA
I told you, it's my job to help people.
ANASTACIA
Yeah, to help people with monsters. Or whatever other weird shit they can't deal with themselves. This kid must have half the town out looking for him. Why's he need us?
LANA
I just -- I have a weird feeling about this one.
ANASTACIA
(PERKING UP)
A vision?
LANA
Not exactly...
ANASTACIA
Not exactly, or no?
LANA
If you want to be somewhere else, no one is making you stay here. I'm sure there are plenty of other people out there who could use your protection.
ANASTACIA
Okay, okay. Point made.
(BEAT)You really think there's something here for us?
LANA
(MORE HESITANT)
Maybe -- I'm still getting the hang of how this works. All I know is I'm not ready to walk away yet.
Fight scene
LANA
Uh uh, cow boy, not unless you go through me first.
(GRUNT OF EFFORT)
LANA STABS THE MINOTAUR WITH HER SPEAR. THE MINOTAUR BELLOWS IN PAIN AND SLAMS INTO HER, KNOCKING HER TO THE GROUND.
LANA
(A NOISE OF SURPRISE AND PAIN AS SHE’S BOWLED OVER)
Anastacia (Lead Role)
Description: Slightly later 20s. Athletic and somewhat brusque.
Anastacia has been entrenched in supernatural goings-on for a while, and would like you to think it's been even longer. Tender butch who doesn't want anyone to know the first part. Most things can be fixed with a hammer, right? Problems with authority, weakness for pretty girls, which wouldn’t be so much of a problem if she hadn’t been chosen by a god for a divine mission protecting The Literal Chosen One (see above).
Reference characters: Jess from League of Their Own, Amalia True from The Nevers. A splash of Jodi Foster in Silence and Scully in The X-Files.
Scenes:
Dialogue
ANASTACIA is on the phone with RICK, her longtime contact in the “weird shit” business. They are discussing her latest case.
ANASTACIA
Apparently he can drive all the way to the highway junction north of here, but once he tries to drive past that, he pops back onto the same stretch of road about 30 miles south. He says it's the same spot every time, though I don't know how you tell corn cobs apart enough to know that.
RICK
(APPEARING VIA PAYPHONE AND SOUNDING LIKE IT)
Mmhmm... So what I'm hearing is: It sounds like this speed demon's stuck on a road to nowhere.
ANASTACIA
Rick, don't make me hang up on you.
RICK
We were both thinking it.
ANASTACIA
I was thinking I'd never be dumb enough to challenge a witch's boyfriend to a drag race, but that's just me.
RICK
Has he tried leaving the road?
ANASTACIA
Good question -- hey demon guy--
DAMIEN O'DOYLE
It's Damien.
ANASTACIA
What I said. You ever tried going through the corn instead of the road?
Fight scene
ANASTACIA
Hey! Get away from her!
ANASTACIA SLAMS HER HAMMER INTO A CULTIST.
ANASTACIA
(GRUNT OF EFFORT/IMPACT)
THE CULTIST HITS THE FLOOR. ANASTACIA TACKLES HIM AND THROWS A PUNCH.
ANASTACIA
(A SECOND WORDLESS NOISE OF EFFORT AS SHE WINDS UP AND HITS HIM)
197 notes
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CASTING CALL: No Normal Life
Hey everyone. Phoebe and Andrea (of @underpressurepodcast and @meandaupod/@s2s-podcast) have teamed up with the fine folks @thecritshow for a brand new audio drama inspired by the TTRPG Monster of the Week, and we're looking for our lead VAs!
It’s 1991, and Anastacia’s just been given a divine mission: Protect The Chosen One from all monsters, minions and masterminds who would seek to do her harm. Not a bad gig for a twentysomething with anger issues and a magic hammer. There’s only… one little thing…
Lana King, the Chosen One? She’s not just some girl with a magic spear, mysterious visions and a smart mouth. She’s also… pretty cute.
And that’s where things get complicated.
No Normal Life is a 10-episode show about hunting monsters, saving the world one small town at a time, and what happens when the person you swore to protect with your life is also the
person you want to spend your life with.
We'll be recording a pilot episode this May (assuming actor availability), with a Kickstarter to fund the whole series running later this year. All roles are paid.
Full audition information, instructions and sides under the cut, or you can find the PDF instructions to review here.
Questions? You can send 'em to the email in the instructions below, and our inbox is open here too.
No Normal Life Casting Call
A fiction podcast inspired by Monster of the Week and The Critshow
Project Type: Fiction podcast
Length: 1 pilot episode, approx. 30 minutes – 9 additional episodes planned, conditional on successful crowdfunding campaign
Recording location: Remote, synchronous recording preferred. Potential opportunity to record on-location if based near Indianapolis,IN.
Recording period: May of 2024 - adjustable based on performer availability.
Compensation: $100 per episode for lead, $50 for supporting, $25 for minor.
Audition deadline: April 6th, 2024
A podcast-quality microphone and quiet audio setup (no echoes or background noise) is required for this podcast. Your audition tape also serves as an audition for your recording setup/space. If you’re new to this, here are some basic tips to improve your space. Please do not treat or “clean up” your audio before sending, other than choosing which line readings you’d like to send or editing out things like mic bumps.
Please only read the dialogue for the character you are auditioning for in the sides below
.
Please limit your audition to 2 takes of the dialogue and fight audio per character. If auditioning for more than 1 character please create separate audio files for each character.
Please save audition files as wav - with character name, underscore, your first and last name. Example: Lana_PennyHamilton.WAV - and email them to auditions [at] thecritshowpodcast.com by April 6th.
About the show
It’s 1991, and Anastacia’s just been given a divine mission: Protect The Chosen One from all monsters, minions and masterminds who would seek to do her harm. Not a bad gig for a twentysomething with anger issues and a magic hammer. There’s only… one little thing…
Lana King, the Chosen One? She’s not just some girl with a magic spear, mysterious visions and a smart mouth. She’s also… pretty cute.
And that’s where things get complicated.
No Normal Life is a 10-episode show about hunting monsters, saving the world one small town at a time, and what happens when the person you swore to protect with your life is also the person you want to spend your life with.
About us
Rev is the executive producer at Critshow Studios - a small recording studio that specializes in actual play podcasts, Let’s Plays and creator interviews. He is also the host and GM of The Critshow - where we catch glimpses of Anastacia and Lana’s back story where they, as NPCs, help guide the players with their experiences. He is also a director, vocal coach, and acting teacher having worked with companies such as Earplay, Crossroads Repertory Theatre, and many PBS affiliates.
In addition to being fans of the Critshow, Phoebe Seiders and Andrea Klassen are founding members of the audio drama collective Procyon Podcasts. Andrea’s previous audio drama work includes Me and AU, Station to Station and writing for a number of early-season episodes of the app Zombies, Run! Phoebe is a co-creator and writer for the podcast Under Pressure. They also play together in a Regency-themed Monster of the Week home game.
Lana (Lead Role)
Description: Early 20s, can be read as a real All-American-Girl-Next-Door and knows it.
Lana is newer to monster hunting, but already a few encounters deep and a little chippy about the idea that she’s greener than other people in the game. More housebroken (polite, anyway) than Anastacia, but with a strong stubborn streak when she thinks she’s being bossed around or talked down to. The literal Chosen One, though she’s not quite sure what she’s been chosen for… yet.
Reference characters: Buffy Summers by way of Yellowjackets, any of the leads in Bring it On if they fought monsters, Gabrielle from Xena if she were the main lead of the show
Scenes:
Dialogue
LANA and ANASTACIA are on their first real case together – investigating what appears to be the mundane disappearance of a child.
LANA
I told you, it's my job to help people.
ANASTACIA
Yeah, to help people with monsters. Or whatever other weird shit they can't deal with themselves. This kid must have half the town out looking for him. Why's he need us?
LANA
I just -- I have a weird feeling about this one.
ANASTACIA
(PERKING UP)
A vision?
LANA
Not exactly...
ANASTACIA
Not exactly, or no?
LANA
If you want to be somewhere else, no one is making you stay here. I'm sure there are plenty of other people out there who could use your protection.
ANASTACIA
Okay, okay. Point made.
(BEAT)You really think there's something here for us?
LANA
(MORE HESITANT)
Maybe -- I'm still getting the hang of how this works. All I know is I'm not ready to walk away yet.
Fight scene
LANA
Uh uh, cow boy, not unless you go through me first.
(GRUNT OF EFFORT)
LANA STABS THE MINOTAUR WITH HER SPEAR. THE MINOTAUR BELLOWS IN PAIN AND SLAMS INTO HER, KNOCKING HER TO THE GROUND.
LANA
(A NOISE OF SURPRISE AND PAIN AS SHE’S BOWLED OVER)
Anastacia (Lead Role)
Description: Slightly later 20s. Athletic and somewhat brusque.
Anastacia has been entrenched in supernatural goings-on for a while, and would like you to think it's been even longer. Tender butch who doesn't want anyone to know the first part. Most things can be fixed with a hammer, right? Problems with authority, weakness for pretty girls, which wouldn’t be so much of a problem if she hadn’t been chosen by a god for a divine mission protecting The Literal Chosen One (see above).
Reference characters: Jess from League of Their Own, Amalia True from The Nevers. A splash of Jodi Foster in Silence and Scully in The X-Files.
Scenes:
Dialogue
ANASTACIA is on the phone with RICK, her longtime contact in the “weird shit” business. They are discussing her latest case.
ANASTACIA
Apparently he can drive all the way to the highway junction north of here, but once he tries to drive past that, he pops back onto the same stretch of road about 30 miles south. He says it's the same spot every time, though I don't know how you tell corn cobs apart enough to know that.
RICK
(APPEARING VIA PAYPHONE AND SOUNDING LIKE IT)
Mmhmm... So what I'm hearing is: It sounds like this speed demon's stuck on a road to nowhere.
ANASTACIA
Rick, don't make me hang up on you.
RICK
We were both thinking it.
ANASTACIA
I was thinking I'd never be dumb enough to challenge a witch's boyfriend to a drag race, but that's just me.
RICK
Has he tried leaving the road?
ANASTACIA
Good question -- hey demon guy--
DAMIEN O'DOYLE
It's Damien.
ANASTACIA
What I said. You ever tried going through the corn instead of the road?
Fight scene
ANASTACIA
Hey! Get away from her!
ANASTACIA SLAMS HER HAMMER INTO A CULTIST.
ANASTACIA
(GRUNT OF EFFORT/IMPACT)
THE CULTIST HITS THE FLOOR. ANASTACIA TACKLES HIM AND THROWS A PUNCH.
ANASTACIA
(A SECOND WORDLESS NOISE OF EFFORT AS SHE WINDS UP AND HITS HIM)
197 notes
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Note
With No Normal Life casting, will you send emails to those who don’t get in or just to those who do?
Our plan is to message everyone.
It's going to take us a little time to listen to all the auditions and make our decisions after the casting call ends, so I would not expect an email from us on April 7 either way, but you will hear from us.
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CASTING CALL: No Normal Life
Hey everyone. Phoebe and Andrea (of @underpressurepodcast and @meandaupod/@s2s-podcast) have teamed up with the fine folks @thecritshow for a brand new audio drama inspired by the TTRPG Monster of the Week, and we're looking for our lead VAs!
It’s 1991, and Anastacia’s just been given a divine mission: Protect The Chosen One from all monsters, minions and masterminds who would seek to do her harm. Not a bad gig for a twentysomething with anger issues and a magic hammer. There’s only… one little thing…
Lana King, the Chosen One? She’s not just some girl with a magic spear, mysterious visions and a smart mouth. She’s also… pretty cute.
And that’s where things get complicated.
No Normal Life is a 10-episode show about hunting monsters, saving the world one small town at a time, and what happens when the person you swore to protect with your life is also the
person you want to spend your life with.
We'll be recording a pilot episode this May (assuming actor availability), with a Kickstarter to fund the whole series running later this year. All roles are paid.
Full audition information, instructions and sides under the cut, or you can find the PDF instructions to review here.
Questions? You can send 'em to the email in the instructions below, and our inbox is open here too.
No Normal Life Casting Call
A fiction podcast inspired by Monster of the Week and The Critshow
Project Type: Fiction podcast
Length: 1 pilot episode, approx. 30 minutes – 9 additional episodes planned, conditional on successful crowdfunding campaign
Recording location: Remote, synchronous recording preferred. Potential opportunity to record on-location if based near Indianapolis,IN.
Recording period: May of 2024 - adjustable based on performer availability.
Compensation: $100 per episode for lead, $50 for supporting, $25 for minor.
Audition deadline: April 6th, 2024
A podcast-quality microphone and quiet audio setup (no echoes or background noise) is required for this podcast. Your audition tape also serves as an audition for your recording setup/space. If you’re new to this, here are some basic tips to improve your space. Please do not treat or “clean up” your audio before sending, other than choosing which line readings you’d like to send or editing out things like mic bumps.
Please only read the dialogue for the character you are auditioning for in the sides below
.
Please limit your audition to 2 takes of the dialogue and fight audio per character. If auditioning for more than 1 character please create separate audio files for each character.
Please save audition files as wav - with character name, underscore, your first and last name. Example: Lana_PennyHamilton.WAV - and email them to auditions [at] thecritshowpodcast.com by April 6th.
About the show
It’s 1991, and Anastacia’s just been given a divine mission: Protect The Chosen One from all monsters, minions and masterminds who would seek to do her harm. Not a bad gig for a twentysomething with anger issues and a magic hammer. There’s only… one little thing…
Lana King, the Chosen One? She’s not just some girl with a magic spear, mysterious visions and a smart mouth. She’s also… pretty cute.
And that’s where things get complicated.
No Normal Life is a 10-episode show about hunting monsters, saving the world one small town at a time, and what happens when the person you swore to protect with your life is also the person you want to spend your life with.
About us
Rev is the executive producer at Critshow Studios - a small recording studio that specializes in actual play podcasts, Let’s Plays and creator interviews. He is also the host and GM of The Critshow - where we catch glimpses of Anastacia and Lana’s back story where they, as NPCs, help guide the players with their experiences. He is also a director, vocal coach, and acting teacher having worked with companies such as Earplay, Crossroads Repertory Theatre, and many PBS affiliates.
In addition to being fans of the Critshow, Phoebe Seiders and Andrea Klassen are founding members of the audio drama collective Procyon Podcasts. Andrea’s previous audio drama work includes Me and AU, Station to Station and writing for a number of early-season episodes of the app Zombies, Run! Phoebe is a co-creator and writer for the podcast Under Pressure. They also play together in a Regency-themed Monster of the Week home game.
Lana (Lead Role)
Description: Early 20s, can be read as a real All-American-Girl-Next-Door and knows it.
Lana is newer to monster hunting, but already a few encounters deep and a little chippy about the idea that she’s greener than other people in the game. More housebroken (polite, anyway) than Anastacia, but with a strong stubborn streak when she thinks she’s being bossed around or talked down to. The literal Chosen One, though she’s not quite sure what she’s been chosen for… yet.
Reference characters: Buffy Summers by way of Yellowjackets, any of the leads in Bring it On if they fought monsters, Gabrielle from Xena if she were the main lead of the show
Scenes:
Dialogue
LANA and ANASTACIA are on their first real case together – investigating what appears to be the mundane disappearance of a child.
LANA
I told you, it's my job to help people.
ANASTACIA
Yeah, to help people with monsters. Or whatever other weird shit they can't deal with themselves. This kid must have half the town out looking for him. Why's he need us?
LANA
I just -- I have a weird feeling about this one.
ANASTACIA
(PERKING UP)
A vision?
LANA
Not exactly...
ANASTACIA
Not exactly, or no?
LANA
If you want to be somewhere else, no one is making you stay here. I'm sure there are plenty of other people out there who could use your protection.
ANASTACIA
Okay, okay. Point made.
(BEAT)You really think there's something here for us?
LANA
(MORE HESITANT)
Maybe -- I'm still getting the hang of how this works. All I know is I'm not ready to walk away yet.
Fight scene
LANA
Uh uh, cow boy, not unless you go through me first.
(GRUNT OF EFFORT)
LANA STABS THE MINOTAUR WITH HER SPEAR. THE MINOTAUR BELLOWS IN PAIN AND SLAMS INTO HER, KNOCKING HER TO THE GROUND.
LANA
(A NOISE OF SURPRISE AND PAIN AS SHE’S BOWLED OVER)
Anastacia (Lead Role)
Description: Slightly later 20s. Athletic and somewhat brusque.
Anastacia has been entrenched in supernatural goings-on for a while, and would like you to think it's been even longer. Tender butch who doesn't want anyone to know the first part. Most things can be fixed with a hammer, right? Problems with authority, weakness for pretty girls, which wouldn’t be so much of a problem if she hadn’t been chosen by a god for a divine mission protecting The Literal Chosen One (see above).
Reference characters: Jess from League of Their Own, Amalia True from The Nevers. A splash of Jodi Foster in Silence and Scully in The X-Files.
Scenes:
Dialogue
ANASTACIA is on the phone with RICK, her longtime contact in the “weird shit” business. They are discussing her latest case.
ANASTACIA
Apparently he can drive all the way to the highway junction north of here, but once he tries to drive past that, he pops back onto the same stretch of road about 30 miles south. He says it's the same spot every time, though I don't know how you tell corn cobs apart enough to know that.
RICK
(APPEARING VIA PAYPHONE AND SOUNDING LIKE IT)
Mmhmm... So what I'm hearing is: It sounds like this speed demon's stuck on a road to nowhere.
ANASTACIA
Rick, don't make me hang up on you.
RICK
We were both thinking it.
ANASTACIA
I was thinking I'd never be dumb enough to challenge a witch's boyfriend to a drag race, but that's just me.
RICK
Has he tried leaving the road?
ANASTACIA
Good question -- hey demon guy--
DAMIEN O'DOYLE
It's Damien.
ANASTACIA
What I said. You ever tried going through the corn instead of the road?
Fight scene
ANASTACIA
Hey! Get away from her!
ANASTACIA SLAMS HER HAMMER INTO A CULTIST.
ANASTACIA
(GRUNT OF EFFORT/IMPACT)
THE CULTIST HITS THE FLOOR. ANASTACIA TACKLES HIM AND THROWS A PUNCH.
ANASTACIA
(A SECOND WORDLESS NOISE OF EFFORT AS SHE WINDS UP AND HITS HIM)
197 notes
·
View notes
Note
For the No Normal Life auditions: takes are ABAB or AABB?
ABAB please!
2 notes
·
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Text
CASTING CALL: No Normal Life
Hey everyone. Phoebe and Andrea (of @underpressurepodcast and @meandaupod/@s2s-podcast) have teamed up with the fine folks @thecritshow for a brand new audio drama inspired by the TTRPG Monster of the Week, and we're looking for our lead VAs!
It’s 1991, and Anastacia’s just been given a divine mission: Protect The Chosen One from all monsters, minions and masterminds who would seek to do her harm. Not a bad gig for a twentysomething with anger issues and a magic hammer. There’s only… one little thing…
Lana King, the Chosen One? She’s not just some girl with a magic spear, mysterious visions and a smart mouth. She’s also… pretty cute.
And that’s where things get complicated.
No Normal Life is a 10-episode show about hunting monsters, saving the world one small town at a time, and what happens when the person you swore to protect with your life is also the
person you want to spend your life with.
We'll be recording a pilot episode this May (assuming actor availability), with a Kickstarter to fund the whole series running later this year. All roles are paid.
Full audition information, instructions and sides under the cut, or you can find the full instructions to review here.
Questions? You can send 'em to the email in the instructions below, and our inbox is open here too.
No Normal Life Casting Call
A fiction podcast inspired by Monster of the Week and The Critshow
Project Type: Fiction podcast
Length: 1 pilot episode, approx. 30 minutes – 9 additional episodes planned, conditional on successful crowdfunding campaign
Recording location: Remote, synchronous recording preferred. Potential opportunity to record on-location if based near Indianapolis,IN.
Recording period: May of 2024 - adjustable based on performer availability.
Compensation: $100 per episode for lead, $50 for supporting, $25 for minor.
Audition deadline: April 6th, 2024
A podcast-quality microphone and quiet audio setup (no echoes or background noise) is required for this podcast. Your audition tape also serves as an audition for your recording setup/space. If you’re new to this, here are some basic tips to improve your space. Please do not treat or “clean up” your audio before sending, other than choosing which line readings you’d like to send or editing out things like mic bumps.
Please only read the dialogue for the character you are auditioning for in the sides below
.
Please limit your audition to 2 takes of the dialogue and fight audio per character. If auditioning for more than 1 character please create separate audio files for each character.
Please save audition files as wav - with character name, underscore, your first and last name. Example: Lana_PennyHamilton.WAV - and email them to auditions [at] thecritshowpodcast.com by April 6th.
About the show
It’s 1991, and Anastacia’s just been given a divine mission: Protect The Chosen One from all monsters, minions and masterminds who would seek to do her harm. Not a bad gig for a twentysomething with anger issues and a magic hammer. There’s only… one little thing…
Lana King, the Chosen One? She’s not just some girl with a magic spear, mysterious visions and a smart mouth. She’s also… pretty cute.
And that’s where things get complicated.
No Normal Life is a 10-episode show about hunting monsters, saving the world one small town at a time, and what happens when the person you swore to protect with your life is also the person you want to spend your life with.
About us
Rev is the executive producer at Critshow Studios - a small recording studio that specializes in actual play podcasts, Let’s Plays and creator interviews. He is also the host and GM of The Critshow - where we catch glimpses of Anastacia and Lana’s back story where they, as NPCs, help guide the players with their experiences. He is also a director, vocal coach, and acting teacher having worked with companies such as Earplay, Crossroads Repertory Theatre, and many PBS affiliates.
In addition to being fans of the Critshow, Phoebe Seiders and Andrea Klassen are founding members of the audio drama collective Procyon Podcasts. Andrea’s previous audio drama work includes Me and AU, Station to Station and writing for a number of early-season episodes of the app Zombies, Run! Phoebe is a co-creator and writer for the podcast Under Pressure. They also play together in a Regency-themed Monster of the Week home game.
Lana (Lead Role)
Description: Early 20s, can be read as a real All-American-Girl-Next-Door and knows it.
Lana is newer to monster hunting, but already a few encounters deep and a little chippy about the idea that she’s greener than other people in the game. More housebroken (polite, anyway) than Anastacia, but with a strong stubborn streak when she thinks she’s being bossed around or talked down to. The literal Chosen One, though she’s not quite sure what she’s been chosen for… yet.
Reference characters: Buffy Summers by way of Yellowjackets, any of the leads in Bring it On if they fought monsters, Gabrielle from Xena if she were the main lead of the show
Scenes:
Dialogue
LANA and ANASTACIA are on their first real case together – investigating what appears to be the mundane disappearance of a child.
LANA
I told you, it's my job to help people.
ANASTACIA
Yeah, to help people with monsters. Or whatever other weird shit they can't deal with themselves. This kid must have half the town out looking for him. Why's he need us?
LANA
I just -- I have a weird feeling about this one.
ANASTACIA
(PERKING UP)
A vision?
LANA
Not exactly...
ANASTACIA
Not exactly, or no?
LANA
If you want to be somewhere else, no one is making you stay here. I'm sure there are plenty of other people out there who could use your protection.
ANASTACIA
Okay, okay. Point made.
(BEAT)You really think there's something here for us?
LANA
(MORE HESITANT)
Maybe -- I'm still getting the hang of how this works. All I know is I'm not ready to walk away yet.
Fight scene
LANA
Uh uh, cow boy, not unless you go through me first.
(GRUNT OF EFFORT)
LANA STABS THE MINOTAUR WITH HER SPEAR. THE MINOTAUR BELLOWS IN PAIN AND SLAMS INTO HER, KNOCKING HER TO THE GROUND.
LANA
(A NOISE OF SURPRISE AND PAIN AS SHE’S BOWLED OVER)
Anastacia (Lead Role)
Description: Slightly later 20s. Athletic and somewhat brusque.
Anastacia has been entrenched in supernatural goings-on for a while, and would like you to think it's been even longer. Tender butch who doesn't want anyone to know the first part. Most things can be fixed with a hammer, right? Problems with authority, weakness for pretty girls, which wouldn’t be so much of a problem if she hadn’t been chosen by a god for a divine mission protecting The Literal Chosen One (see above).
Reference characters: Jess from League of Their Own, Amalia True from The Nevers. A splash of Jodi Foster in Silence and Scully in The X-Files.
Scenes:
Dialogue
ANASTACIA is on the phone with RICK, her longtime contact in the “weird shit” business. They are discussing her latest case.
ANASTACIA
Apparently he can drive all the way to the highway junction north of here, but once he tries to drive past that, he pops back onto the same stretch of road about 30 miles south. He says it's the same spot every time, though I don't know how you tell corn cobs apart enough to know that.
RICK
(APPEARING VIA PAYPHONE AND SOUNDING LIKE IT)
Mmhmm... So what I'm hearing is: It sounds like this speed demon's stuck on a road to nowhere.
ANASTACIA
Rick, don't make me hang up on you.
RICK
We were both thinking it.
ANASTACIA
I was thinking I'd never be dumb enough to challenge a witch's boyfriend to a drag race, but that's just me.
RICK
Has he tried leaving the road?
ANASTACIA
Good question -- hey demon guy--
DAMIEN O'DOYLE
It's Damien.
ANASTACIA
What I said. You ever tried going through the corn instead of the road?
Fight scene
ANASTACIA
Hey! Get away from her!
ANASTACIA SLAMS HER HAMMER INTO A CULTIST.
ANASTACIA
(GRUNT OF EFFORT/IMPACT)
THE CULTIST HITS THE FLOOR. ANASTACIA TACKLES HIM AND THROWS A PUNCH.
ANASTACIA
(A SECOND WORDLESS NOISE OF EFFORT AS SHE WINDS UP AND HITS HIM)
#audio drama auditions#the critshow#procyon podcasts#monster of the week#audio drama#fiction podcast#voice acting
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HI!! started listening yesterday and i am already obsessed with this show. i was wondering if you would ever have any posters of the logo available? it’s so cool and… the autism… i need!
hi! welcome! i am procrastinating something and so prepare for WAY MORE INFORMATION than you asked for!
we do in fact have a merch store, and actually as of the 7th of February 2024, there is a sale happening. i checked and while unfortunately we don't have posters of the show logo, you can still get that logo printed on:
a variety of shirt types in a wide range of colors
stickers
pins
magnets
pillows
phone cases
totes
a few of these pictured below:
you can find more options by clicking here and scrolling down.
also, while we don't have show logo posters, we do have other Starship Iris poster designs available:
"you make plants grow in cold empty space"
"landers never stand down"
"SPACE BEES"
"penguins get scared too"
official birdie and the swan song merch
some designs might not make sense to you yet, depending on where you are in the show, but they will. oh, they will. (except maybe the penguins shirt; i think i'm the only one who really thinks it's funny.)
with the current sale (which is active for like 62 more hours):
a mini print is 6.8 x 12 inches and $7 plus shipping
a small print is 12 x 18 inches and $11 plus shipping
a medium print is 16 x 24 inches and $16 plus shipping (they're not all available in this size bc it's pretty big!)
you can also get these designs printed on the aforementioned list of objects. some examples:
the SPACE BEES design is far and away the most popular one for this show, a fact which continues to fill me with joy. i like to think that somewhere out there, a SPACE BEES mini poster hangs in a place of honor in a dorm room, thoroughly confusing someone's roommate.
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At long last and just under the wire for Pride month, episode Episode 5 of Keep It Steady is finally here!
Listen here or wherever you get your podcasts. Transcript is here.
In this episode: a plot-important sing-along.
As always, if you'd like to help make this show possible, you can back us on Patreon for fun rewards, including access to occasional mini-episode scripts from Gabe's point of view.
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Let's hear from our lovely audience:
"The hold that this song has on most Wolf 359 fans is indescribable... We're all just thinking about free floating in space after a stressful day listening to this smooth af tune."
"It's so good, every version of it rocks, it has made me cry multiple times"
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CASTING CALL: Selkirk Additional Roles
When Tony Vinchetti is attacked by a mysterious creature, he discovers the sleepy Canadian town he grew up in is actually a haven for monsters and other supernatural beings hiding in plain sight. As the only survivor of the creature’s murderous rampage, Tony must join forces with paranormal park rangers Jodi Whaled and Garrett Tran to stop the killings and pull the town back from the brink of magical war…
Audition deadline: Midnight Pacific Time, December. 31, 2022
Length: 7 new episodes in Part 1, approximately 30 minutes each
Recording location: Primarily remote synchronous recordings during North American daytime and/or evening hours, mainly weekends
Recording period: Spring/Summer 2023
Compensation: $15 USD/hour of recording time; minimum pay of $20 per VA
See roles and audition instructions
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PSA FOR NEW TUMBLR USERS
This court is a den of lies, the Emperor's servants are not to be trusted. Despite what they may tell you, his son's death was not an accident. His generals and eunuchs scheme against eachother, but he is too absorbed in frivolous pursuits and personal glories to notice. Tread carefully, friend.
#hello all new audio fiction folks coming to this app#we thought it was important you know this going in
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Get your ears ready, the second episode of Keep It Steady debuts tomorrow, Wednesday, May 18th!
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