phoenicianj
My Personal Insanities
Ha, they think I'm an adult, the fools!!
Just a confused and tired Uni student (ISTJ, Slytherin, Perfectionist), 19yr old with an internet connection and a computer - Studying Data Science and Asian societies
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I really enjoy this blog so much. Gimme your most favorite batshit auspolitics moment from the 2000s to 2010s. please. i am morbidly curious.
2007: The APEC conference, where all global leaders converge in one city to pretend like they're doing things, is to be held in Sydney, Australia. With the war on terror in full swing, security is at a maximum, and large swathes of the city are placed behind a giant multi-layered steel fence to keep the world leaders far away from the unwashed masses.
Attempting to ward off trouble, organisers of the conference hold a meeting with notorious political comedy prank group "The Chaser", to tell them they are, under absolutely no circumstances getting anywhere near any world leaders, and to not even bother trying.
"The whole perimeter is secure," security forces told them sternly. "The only thing getting through that fence is a motorcade."
24 hours later The Chaser were on their way towards the fence with a motorcade.
Now a few things should have tipped off security guards that this fake Canadian motorcade was not a the real deal. Number one: Canada wasn't at the conference, number two: no country has actually had security running alongside cars since the 60s, and three: most security guards don't carry video cameras with them or passes that read "this is fake".
Nevertheless the ruse was more successful than anyone had anticipated, and The Chaser team were happily waved into the most secure area on planet earth by police, who informed the incognito comedians that "the road is yours."
Reaching the outside of George Bush's hotel, the pranksters now began to worry that they were never going to be stopped by police and decided to get out of the car and walk back to the fence.
While dressed as Osama Bin Laden.
At this point all hell broke loose. Snipers were locked on. Confused police scrambled, and immediately arrested the whole group, only breathing a sigh of relief when they saw the words "Chaser" on the fake security passes.
Bizarrely the police opted to give a full escort to the guy dressed in a suit, and allowed the other man cosplaying as the world's most wanted terrorist to just casually walk out on his own before booking him at the perimeter.
The Chaser team said that while being put in a cell overnight wasn't fun, they were less stressed after police started visiting to ask for photos and signatures.
The prank group were later hauled before the courts and threatened with a massive fine, but the case was eventually dropped after they successfully argued that it's not technically breaking-in if the cops happily wave you into a high security zone.
Needless to say they have changed that law for future APECs.
Making light of the situation, the prank group also returned to the site a few days later dressed as carboard cars, to see just how flimsy a disguise could get past police.
This time at least, they were not let in.
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please add the QLD vice premier screenshot from 6 news 🙏🙏🙏
Sometimes you can really tell there's 16 year olds running 6 news
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have you posted about our prime minister who just fuckin disappeared into the ocean yet
Oh, you mean the one we eulogised by naming a swimming pool after him?
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Conversation
Summary of Twenty Thousand Leagues Under The Sea
Captain Nemo: So, M. Aronax, do you think I can do the thing?
M. Aronax: I don't see how it is scientifically possible to do the thing.
Captain Nemo: But watch! By doing *techno babble* I can do the thing!
M. Aronax: Wow! You did the thing!
Conseil: Classify all the fish.
Ned Land: Meat! I want to eat MEEEEEEEAT!
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Concept art for Disney’s 20,000 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA (1954).
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Nemo: Vibe Check! *rams submarine into a British naval ship*
*watching ship sink slowly through the window of the submarine* In my defense, Professor, I simply did not vibe with it.
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Now that I'm thinking about Classic Nautical Literature again,
Nothing can convince me that most of 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea isn't just Captain Nemo trying to hit on Professor Aronnax by showing him all his cool stuff and the secrets of the ocean.
(and it was definitely working)
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Date a guy who’s tall. Date a guy who’s handsome. Date a guy who loves music. Date a guy who will take you on surprise adventures late at night. Date a guy who has a deep personal hatred for British imperialism. Date a guy who built a futuristic submarine on a deserted island, changed his name, and became a vigilante with a lifelong goal of liberating the oppressed and overthrowing the British empire. Date Captain Nemo.
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I love that every negative review of 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea complains about there being too much description of marine life and not enough action, because the reviewer thought the book was going to be an action adventure story when it’s really a gothic romance from the POV of a very enthusiastic marine scientist.
And... as a gay biologist myself, this book was an absolute delight. I will take no further critique of this novel at this time.
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hi psa: the second someone apologizes for being excited about something, that is the moment you start talking about it with 10x the enthusiasm because 100% guaranteed they have, at some point in their life, been shamed or told shut up or calm down about something that brought them joy and learned to apologize for taking up space and expressing themselves - learned to make themselves smaller- and that’s the absolute worst feeling in the whole world so please, the moment they apologize or say “I’ll shut up now”, you start talking about it for them, hype it up, encourage them to talk your ear off and participate in their excitement. We want their passion, we want their excitement, joy and love. We do not want to be stunted and bitter and angry like the ones who tried to stifle us, we want to foster and nurture the glow in their eyes and the sound of their voice speeding up with exhilaration
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I mean, yeah thats kinda the point. A highway is just a shitty train, bc we can’t trust drivers to follow the rules
Cars become autonomous and traffic is controlled through AI. AI realizes cars are more efficient when in slipstream. AI connects cars in a line to minimize drag. AI returns us to trains.
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His growth was fantastic, loved this character
You wanted me. Well, let this be a lesson…
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This ^^
America's "wonders" are only accessible if you are already wonderfully wealthy
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A fat mood
press E to obliterate yourself from existence
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