phenomenalasterisk
Phenomenal Asterisk
Phe - she/they - 33 - bi/pan/poly/genderqueer - 🔞 - multifandom - Ao3 - fuck terfs
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picture of 2 guys holding hands in a field of flowers on a beautiful sunny summer day with text over it saying "lets grow dicks together" someone make it happen im too sleepy
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👁👄👁🍿
This is so Jaskier coded. And why not.
Geralt had known bad luck but this was absurd. A cuckolded dwarf who just happened to know a wizard, two holy sisters, a siren posing as a magistrate, and one very unlucky bard with a penchant for Touching Things That Should Not Be Touched, and here he was twelve hours later - a hungover witcher on his horse being followed by a petulant, jealous bard camel.
Roach was being incredibly tolerant considering the disregard for her personal space. Something about Jaskier suddenly inhabiting a body with four legs must have inspired comradery - or pity. It was probably pity.
Geralt could only guess at what his friend's camel-brain must be thinking. "I've got 4 legs now, no reason you shouldn't be riding me, Geralt" or something like it the witcher had no doubt.
"Hreeeoooooooonk!" came Jaskier's indignant camel-call once more. He sighed and batted the Viscount of Lettenhove's slobbery muzzle away for the dozenth time.
I call it Camel-Verse.
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a stud in black leather on a black motorcycle just revved their engine at me and thank god I tore my demonic uterus out ages ago because I think that would have finally knocked me up
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Peter Pan AU because Draco and Tinkerbell really are one and the same 🧚
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What does BDSM look like in the cars universe?
Like, I don't think they'd necessarily be into, like, rope bondage, because cars don't have the same range of motion as humans.
You could maybe do things like take their wheels off, but does that end up being like a doctor kink too? Like, mechanics are car doctors, right?
Do you use one of those folding sun-visor things as a blindfold?
What's the car equivalent to a leash. A tow truck? A hitch? Maybe.
Can you whip a car? Maybe you use some of those rubber hammers, like "kneel*, slave, and receive your 5 dents from your mistress! Count them"
Suspension bondage I guess is doable, you just need one of these:
Which again is probably like a medical kink to cars. It's like a putting a human on a doctor's examination bed with stirrups.
I'm just wondering if there's BDSM in the cars universe without it getting mechanic-kink. It seems an easy trap to fall in.
How do you gag a car? Take out their radiator? Drain the fluid? Or maybe the grille? What about, like, Teslas that don't have grilles? (Are there teslas in the carverse?) are they mute?
Where do cars hear from? Like, if you wanted to do sensory deprivation on a car, where do you put the earbuds? It's the side mirrors, isn't it. They're probably equivalent anatomical features.
I don't think you can do wax play to a car, because that's just a fancy car wash.
Bondo and one of those dent-hammer things is probably involved in Car BDSM. A welder and angle grinder for the extreme stuff. Speaking of angle grinder, is booting a car like putting them in handcuffs?
Instead of a cage, do you put your Puppy!car in a garage? Do you role play that she's at the mean impound lot and has to do you a favor to get released?
I have so many questions. I'm tempted to go look on ao3 to see if fans have come up with answers. But at the same time, I don't want to.
* don't ask how cars kneel
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it's easter :) and also trans visibility day so thought it was time to do a quick sketch of them
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yo mama so crumb that strong ants took her away forever
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i want to draw him with bare hands and feet to help him stick better. i know his suit is supposed to be thin in the hands and feet, but consider: i like this better
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283,000 likes………giant meteor strike the earth rn holy shit. oh my god.
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wdym an average platonic bond cant be deep and meaningful do none of you remember the power of friendship
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Special shout out to "the willow's dank shade."
never let anyone tell you that trawling through mediocre victorian poetry isn't worth it. we just happened upon an absolute BANGER of a worm poem. go read it or else 🪱🪱🪱
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