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Gratification.
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It sucks when being stressed makes you nonverbal but people expect you to tell them when you are stressed?
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i basically assume that people don’t like me unless they explicitly tell me they like me and then periodically remind me
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People who grew up emotionally neglected tend to carry some false beliefs about emotions in relationships. (By Jonice Webb)
Here’s a good, but not exhaustive, sampling:
1. Sharing your feelings or troubles with others will make them feel burdened.
2. Sharing your feelings or troubles with others will chase them away.
3. If you let other people see how you feel, they will use it against you.
4. Sharing your feelings with others will make you look weak.
5. Letting others see your weaknesses puts you at a disadvantage.
6. It’s best not to fight if you want to have a good relationship.
7. Talking about a problem isn’t helpful. Only action solves a problem.
Fortunately, not one of these beliefs is true. In fact, they are each and every one dead wrong. (The only exception is if you share your feelings with another emotionally neglected person, who may not have any idea how to respond). When you grow up receiving consistent direct or indirect messages that you should keep your feelings to yourself, it is natural to assume that those feelings are burdensome and undesirable to others.
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therapist: how was your week?
me: mm.. i can’t remember
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me: im so touch starved. please someone lovingly give me physical touch
also me: If u fucking touch me I will kill u and then myself
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me, with tears in my eyes: time to make a joke
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People who grew up emotionally neglected tend to carry some false beliefs about emotions in relationships. (By Jonice Webb)
Here’s a good, but not exhaustive, sampling:
1. Sharing your feelings or troubles with others will make them feel burdened.
2. Sharing your feelings or troubles with others will chase them away.
3. If you let other people see how you feel, they will use it against you.
4. Sharing your feelings with others will make you look weak.
5. Letting others see your weaknesses puts you at a disadvantage.
6. It’s best not to fight if you want to have a good relationship.
7. Talking about a problem isn’t helpful. Only action solves a problem.
Fortunately, not one of these beliefs is true. In fact, they are each and every one dead wrong. (The only exception is if you share your feelings with another emotionally neglected person, who may not have any idea how to respond). When you grow up receiving consistent direct or indirect messages that you should keep your feelings to yourself, it is natural to assume that those feelings are burdensome and undesirable to others.
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Them: This isn’t like you! I miss the real you!
Me: You don’t know me, I literally made a personality so I could talk to you. Chill.
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useless!!! stupid!!! worthless!!! i know i am i know i know i know
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me: I WANT TO FUCKING KILL MYSELF
someone: what’s wrong??
me: oh it’s over already don’t worry lol
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People: you need to be more assertive and stand up for yourself
Me: does crying alone in my room count?
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suggestion: why do they want to know so much about me. who are they working for. whats their motives. they tried to fool me before but im paying attention now
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