number-1-crush - Tumblr blog

number-1-crush · 3 months

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pretty woman in my math class… and she’s nice to me..

#might have a TIIIINY little crush. keeping it casual #she’s just pretty. and nice. and has a cool name #we’ll see! she’ll be a great friend if nothing else

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number-1-crush · 6 months

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uuUUUUUGGGHHHHH i just need someone to grab my face and pull me onto their lap and call me a pretty boy in a calculated smooth voice is that SO hard to ask for

#don’t mind me. having a normal one rn #oh three in the morning. how you taunt me so #pseudosexuality is so funny

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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soooo i asked them out. got rejected teehee

#i’m a /little/ depressed yeah but i’m ok #i’ve been rejected way worse before so i’ll be fine :]#they literally told me they wanted to be closer friends with me. that is not a bad thing at all #so like. i’ll wallow for a lil bit but then i’ll be alright :] i’m good at recovering from this stuff

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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AAAAAAAA

aaaaaaaaa

#i’m nervous abt confessing to them so i decided to watch a tarot video bc i am mildly spiritual and they keep me calm #it was SO APPLICABLE #accepting the unknown. advancing a relationship. she was CERTAIN a friend had a secret crush #when she did the charms part she got a bunch of letters and i saw my name and their name and the word romance #i got the fool!!!!!!! the fucking fool!!! and the moon!!!! and and and!!! AUGJH #god i’m so nervous but i’m excited now!#the cards are right. i should focus on what i can do and just be glad i tried. and who knows maybe it’ll work out. i did pull success #god <333333 i WILL tell them how i feel. it WILL happen

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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aaaaaaaaa

#the school year’s almost over #which means i need to confess to them soon #because if i don’t while i’m still seeing them daily i’m never gonna do it #and i need to TRY #because i’ll regret it if i don’t do it #but i’m so so so nervous. i don’t know what to say or do or anything #and i only have like. tomorrow and the day after. AAAA #they’re too pretty :( and i don’t wanna make things awkward bc they’re super cool #but i can’t just /not/ tell them #i gotta be brave. idk how i’m gonna do it in such little time though #god. godddd

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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oh my god oh my god oh my god

#ok so we had ap testing this week right #and bc i have mutual friends w/them i got to talk to them a lot during breaks/waiting to start #and i stg there have been signals. i’m. !!!!!!#ok for starters. we were sharing jokes n getting along #that’s pretty standard we get along quite well #BUT !#sometimes i’d say smth and it’d get overshadowed bc loud room and solid group of ppl talking right?#they would always respond to me if nobody else did. they paid attention #and we were in a group of like 4-7 ppl. they were standing adjacent to me and should have been facing towards the center of the circle #they were angled towards me. foot posture and all #when i got in a silly fake argument with a different friend they joined my side of the debate #now this could have just been because i’m correct. but.#they talked with me one-on-one for a bit. tbey started conversation and laughed at my jokes and we encouraged each other #we made eye contact for a second longer than expected (felt right.) my vision became so rose-tinted i remember their eyes being purple #weird memory distortion considering eyes /can’t/ be purple but w/e #when i waved at a different friend across the room that they were somewhat near they waved too.#we smiled at each other. they /waved/ at me they laughed the eye contact the angling their body language was open and receptive and !!!!!#AUGH do they even KNOW what they do to me #i’m trying to signal back as well. big fan of the hair twirl/tuck #probs bc it’s a stim i already have lmao. but still i <3333333 #i need to try to invite them out again. been thinking maybe an arcade bc those are easy fun #but idk! idk #still. golly…… <3333333

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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having anxiety and a crush at the same time is so much to deal with

#i felt like i was getting signals. so i invite them out to get sushi with a few other ppl #admittedly short notice i will not lie #i got an ‘i’m sorry i’m busy :( have fun though!’#pretty standard message. polite even #i am currently trying to stop treating this as a sign that they want to avoid me #girlie u asked them the day before. they were busy on a saturday. u are looking so #fucking far into this #chronic fucking overthinker. dear god #this is supposed to be fun!!! crushes are meant to be fun!!#they say hi to me when they don’t have to they laugh when i make a shitty joke i keep catching their eye from across the room!!!#so one ‘i’m busy sorry :(‘ and a lack of offers to hang out and not texting often aren’t indicative of anything!!! christ #i mean it’s obvious they aren’t indicative of anything! because i am also guilty #i had never invited them somewhere before and i almost never text them #and CLEARLY i’m interested.#god #anyways i keep envisioning this confession-gone-sour thing in my head and i keep shaking myself like #Do You Hear Yourself???? they Aren’t Like That they’re nice they’re kind #even if i get rejected they’d probably still be down to be friends! i mean fuck dude #i need to just. Chill Tf Out #but it’s hard when i have chronic Can’t Chill Out Disease otherwise known as Generalized Anxiety Disorder

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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i’ve been catching their gaze a lot recently. it truly feels like they’re staring at me. i’m gonna look more often and find out

#i wanna ask them out #but i haven’t done that since i was… 10? so it’s kinda scary #and by kinda i mean very #i don’t even know how you ask someone out??? i’d look it up but i know it’d just be pickup artists #who are not good advice givers #i need to talk to my friends for advice i think #i hope they want me to ask them out. i like them a lot #and normally my feelings fade by this time. but they haven’t #they’re nice. they compliment me. they’re gorgeous. we hugged at prom i think. not sure if i hallucinated it #i swear i see them look at me #it’s hard to tell in class but we locked eyes at prom. they had no reason to look behind them #i need to just be brave and say it. even if i get rejected #idk what to say though #‘hey i like you a lot and i wanted to get it off my chest. if it’s mutual cool if not i’d like to still be friends’#ehhh i mean. not bad but i don’t wanna seem too unconfident #but i also don’t want to put them in an awkward situation #deffo overthinking it. i’ll just ask my friends’ advice tomorrow

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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god. aaaaa

#so prom was yesterday #big fun!! good times i danced a lot #and of COURSE i saw them and said hi and we complimented each other #they looked so GOOOD they had this gorgeous white dress and the back???? fucking beautiful design #ngl i stared a bit. a lot #BUT! i think i also saw them stare a bit #at one point i was dancing real hard with friends. they walked by in a conga line #i immediately thought ‘i need to party rock so hard right now’ and really really tried to maximize the fun i was having #i think i saw them look from the corner of my eye #later i was getting water w a friend and they were waiting in line for a photo not far from us #i thought i saw them looking. took a deep breath and glanced over #99% sure we made eye contact (i looked away really fast and then did a hair tuck to indicate interest)#bestie were u. staring at me. bc /////////////#i need to just gather my courage and ask them out #it’s scary but i gotta try #idk when or how though. i Will Figure It Out

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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oh my fucking god. OH my fucking god

#hiii been a bit #i’ve been Busy lmao #anyways. i STILL have a big mega crush on this classmate #prom is this weekend so i dyed my hair to go with my outfit #(i’m not gonna ask them out before prom bc i don’t want to make prom awkward for either of us lmao)#anywho i show up to school today #and guess who ALSO got a new hairdo #it’s so CUTTTEEEEEE you have NO fucking clue #it’s short and fluffy and black with purple streaks and oh my god !!!! it’s so fucking cuteee god. god #and when we saw each other with out New Hair we just both blurted slightly butchered ‘hair!! cool!!’ sentences at each other for a sec #… it looks soft and i want to play with it i’m not going to lie #oh i also overheard them saying they got it for prom which means they are going to prom #which means i am going to see them in a PROM OUTFIT #which. GODDDD #and if it goes with their hair??? purple and black???#i swear to GOD if they go to prom goth my heart will just like give out. like it’ll pop or something #main issue is i’m heading to prom with my brother bc twins #and he gets kinda nervous at big parties like these and i don’t wanna abandon him #all assuming that i even SEE them at prom we may not run into each other #still. i will daydream :] about teaching them how to box step

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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AAAHAHAHAHAHA LOVE WINS

#i’m being dramatic but uh #we just got back from spring break #and our teacher gave us a new seating chart #and i sit RIGHT BEHIND THEM with MUTUAL FRIENDS right there so we can actually all TALK #FUCK yes

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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please look at me when you think i don’t see you. please laugh when i make a joke from across the room. please talk to me, please offer to work on something with me. please know me, please know me, please know me

#SORRY i’m going INSANE tonight #lovecore #crushcore #<- this one deserves these tags #i want them to see me. i want them to want to know me the way i want to know them #i want them to want to call me sweet names. i want them to want to put hearts in their texts to me #i want them to crave my company just how i crave theirs #god. god i am falling hard tonight #i want them to daydream the way i do. dreams of dates and comfort and laughter and gentle kisses on the cheek #i want them to want to be around me #god i hope they want to be around me #please look at me please look at me please look at me #<- so normal rn #don’t tag this as yandere or anything like that btw pls. i will block u if u do

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number-1-crush · 1 year

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you guys have no clue how head-over-heels i’m falling