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thank you for the tag words-after-midnight! <3
AW YEAH WIP WEDNESDAY LET'S GO.
this is from the prologue to "the living machine" (the working title of the follow-up to "among the elements"):
How old are you, Khalid?
How old am I allowed to be?
this one's a bonus for people who speak mage: the ascension:
Do you use cola as a Focus, or coffee?
May I?
tag! @aintgonnatakethis @byronicbi @bargainbincheese
@borisyvain @deanwax @noblebs @sentfromwolves
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okay sorry, I deleted the original chart with everyone on it, but I'm still feeling sooooo deranged about this size difference. fuckksjklf. his height was my wife's choice and she's such a genius for it
#his horns gotta add at least another foot#orion has his work cut out for him trying to peg this mfer
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dr. khalid abandonato: character intro!
Because I should be doing other things, but I'm giving him his own novella.
I thought it would be fun to write a prelude for our friend the Scientist from "Among the Elements," a former Mage: the Ascension NPC who has broken containment and leveled up to OC status.
Meet Khalid Abandonato, Doctor of Physics!
Look at him with Arete 2 + hair over half his stupid face :3 + the white shock of hair of stress lol
Our timefluid friend will tell us about his backstory in the first chapter, but I've mentioned in other posts he had an early Awakening, was a child prodigy and a precocious learner, and became a father at 19. IDK what any of those tropes are or what tropes I'm going to mess with, other than the first cabal is one of my favorite sources of Mage character development.
Khalid's Intelligence score is maxed out and he has high Wits and Stamina; he is also, to start out--being as he's 10 or 12 years old (time isn't an arrow) and doesn't go outside unless he absolutely has to--low in Perception, Social stats, and Dexterity.
Without caffeine and sugar, he gets nothing done.
Since he's an NPC in his daughter's backstory the entire arc of the thing is already done for me, so that's kind of nice for everyone.
Things that might will happen:
aroace enemies-to-friends situation with a Technocratic New World Order Operative who falls in "I want to be friends with him" with him
cyberpunk shenanigans with a midpoint tragedy literally every midpoint
the author forgets words for things despite having written in this ttrpg system since the year 2006 & passes it off as "technobabble"
metafiction bullshit for no good reason
terrible things NOT being inflicted upon a minor character bc he will eventually have a Mentor
Uhhhh I guess a song? Yeah he has a song. Chapter 1 Khalid only has dots in Forces/Life/Matter this is appropriate.
That's him! That's my little lightning rod. Here to deflect my inability to shut up about my current wip~
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Yseult by Tarek Mawad for Wonderland Magazine December 2023
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Me, snickering about something that's gonna happen too many chapters away: "Haha, I'm gonna commit a murder~"
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something you said has been on my mind for a while - "kink is not inherently sexual". good faith! I don't understand that at all, could you explain it a bit?
This post is educational, hooray! Extensive discussion of kink under the cut. Nothing explicitly sexual is described in detail.
Please note that in this post, I use the terms top and Dom/me interchangeably. This is because I personally identify as a "top" and not a Dom. Some communities draw sharp lines between these two terms, and it's useful to make sure that you're using the same definition as other people when you're talking. Some people use "top" solely to refer to the giving or penetrative partner, which is not synonymous with the dominant partner. Topping subs, power bottoms, and all other permutations exist. I just use that term for myself because I don't like being called a Dom. It sounds like a guy's name to me, I don't like it.
When I text my wife in every morning, "Please bring me my coffee," and she answers, "Yes, Sir!" is that sexual? I'm surely not feeling sexual when I'm barely awake. When I hold my other wife's hand when she's having a depressive fit and tell her, "Daddy's got you, it's okay," that's kink, but it's not sexual. In that moment, neither of us feel particularly sexy, and we're surely not engaging in sex, but it's kink that - forgive the pun - binds us more strongly together.
One of my girls wears a 24/7 collar that I locked in place. (She can ask me at any point to take it off, or she can take it off herself if she wants to, but she chooses this.) That's kink. It's also... a necklace. That's not any more inherently sexual than her wedding ring, though it - for us - certainly symbolizes part of our relationship that happens to sometimes include sex, exactly the same as a wedding ring.
There are a lot of types of kink that don't include sexual contact in any way or which might include sexual contact but don't need to. One of my friends is a sex-repulsed ace bootblack. They literally take care of the boots of tops, usually at play parties. For them, this act of service and submission allows them to go into a particular headspace that's very fulfilling for them. They are explicitly serving the people whose boots they clean and polish. The Dom/mes receive that service and not only get really great-looking boots out of the deal but also get the feeling of power from having someone eager to take care of them and serve them. For some of us, that kind of service allows us access to a feeling of power that can be hard to access in our daily life, and that feels really good.
Sometimes, it can feel good in a sexy way, and sometimes it feels good in a "makes lizard brain feel powerful but not sexy" way. Neither one is inherently better or worse or more or less kinky than the other.
Sometimes, people who like being whipped like it because the line between pain and pleasure is like a wave on the ocean, and they want to surf it. Sometimes, that involves mashing squishy bits together, and sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes, it's just about riding that endorphin wave and then having someone take care of you afterwards.
Sometimes, people want to be tied up in elaborate shibari knots and fucked. Sometimes, people want to be tied up in elaborate shibari knots because that process requires a lot of trust and is an intimate ritual that takes a lot of time. Sometimes, it's both. Sometimes, people want to tie up others because it's a beautiful work of art, because that ritual of binding is a ritual and accesses something sacred for them. Sometimes, they want to be tied up because it's playtime, and that's fun for them! Sometimes, they want to be tied up because when they're tied up, they are 0% in control, and they want to just surrender control to someone whom they can trust.
Some people want to go into sub space - that headspace I talked about earlier - because in their everyday life, they have a lot of responsibilities and stress, and going into that space where nobody can ask anything from them, where they have no responsibility to make any decisions at all, is a relief to them. That might involve squishy bits, or it might not. Some people like going into that sub space because being someone's Good Boy, Sweet Girl, or Good Pup is gender-affirming for them. A friend of mine only feels really safe when he's got his pup hood on, because that means he's With Master, who will protect him.
Some people get gender affirmation out of being in control, being someone's Daddy or Mistress, Sir or Boss. It allows them to access a power that helps them to square their shoulders and take on the world.
All of this entirely skips over the fact that a person's primary sexual organ is between their ears, and some people do get sexual fulfillment out of kink even when no genitalia are involved at all, but I cannot stress enough that the reasons that people enter into the multitude of kink situations in the world are as varied as the people involved. People gain access to comfort, to feelings of stability and order and control over their lives, to gender affirmation, to endorphins that are or aren't sexual in nature, to release from responsibility, to ritual and intimacy, to the ability to provide for others and take care of others in a way that their outside lives may or may not permit. For that matter, they may simply gain access to a paycheck, and that's fine, too. That's no more or less "selling your body" than when I used to run my ass off for 13+ hours a day at my retail job, and I guarantee they're making way, way better money.
The fact that so many people see kink as only and purely sexual means they're missing out on so much of what kink can offer, and narrowing down the experiences of others to this tiny little sliver of what actually exists. Yes, it can be sexual, but it doesn't have to be. The reasons that people engage in kink are as varied as the reasons that people engage in any other kind of interaction, and the fulfillment they get from it is as varied, too.
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Rosaleen Norton (New Zealander, 1917 - 1979) - Encounter
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GRAVE CONVERSATIONS with David Dastmalchian
Episode 1: Kate Siegel
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Unique vintage male names, companion to this post:
There are less of them because people seemed to be less creative with naming their sons. Not sure why.
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favourite line tag
tagged by @ahordeofwasps, thank you! here's one of my favourite lines from claws so far. (context, this is Rainier thinking about what Vivien's like):
He fucks like he’s a human sacrifice, kisses like a cannibal, begs like it’s for his life, not an orgasm.
claws taglist: @belovedviolence @foxboyclit (ask to be +/-)
no-pressure tagging @vollzz @at-thezenith and @ceph-the-ghost-writer
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3, 6, 10, 21 for edgy OC asks c:
Hello!! Thank you for sending these in!
3. What is your OC’s fatal flaw? Are they aware of this flaw?
So, more or less, all of my OCs have fatal flaws that they are aware of to some extent, but don't have a healthy outlet on how to deal with them. Like Nikolas having alcohol problems that he's been trying to cover up with work, or Edvardas being unable to deal with his emotions well and ends up feeling shame every time he opens up more. Medeina never learned to stay in one place, all she knows is running away, and she’s scared of getting close to people.
6. How easily could your OC be convinced to do something that goes against their moral compass?
None of them would budge unless it is at the cost of someone else’s life, especially the person they love the most. Then they would probably do the most inevitable thing to save them.
10. What’s an AU that would be interesting to explore with your OC?
What if, like, thirteen years ago their parents’ accident totally tore the family apart and now everyone’s just doing their own thing and no one really keeps in touch or knows what’s going on in each other’s lives?
Could have become a big blame game.
21. Does your OC have any illnesses or disorders? How do they handle it?
Edvardas struggles a lot with anxiety and panic attack problems. He’s terrible at handling them, so he keeps most of it to himself and retreats into his shell.
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— Frank Bidart, from “Half-light: Collected Poems 1965-2016; ‘The Third Hour of the Night’", published c. 2017.
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