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me? constantly afraid of being abandoned and replaced? hell yes
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Mary Elizabeth Braddon, The Doctor's Wife (1864)
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girls want to wear flower crowns and to smell like vanilla and to ignore responsibilities so they can read as many books as their heart wants them to
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why do i have to speak why is it not enough to show up somewhere and have big giant eyes
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Aku nodded, "Yeah, I can do that. It's... really scary, but I trust you. I'll work really hard and try to get the free time so we can do this. I'm probably going to be worried about it all week, so if I go through all of that and it doesn't end up working out I would have burned all that energy for nothing."
And she would be less likely to try it a second time. She was working hard to talk herself into it now. If she had to do it all over again, she had no idea how she was going to handle herself. She would remember how exhausting it had been to work herself up the first time and decide the second attempt just wasn't worth it. But at the same time, she didn't want to disappoint one of her only friends. That she would continue to stubbornly press back and remain out of the rest of Tsubasa's life simply wasn't fair, from an objective standpoint. If she really wanted to show her that she cared, it only made sense to try to reach out to the people she was closest to.
The fear had to be conquered at some point.
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She took a deep breath to steady herself and smiled again, "I'm sure it's gonna be great. I can do this, and... If nothing else, at least I can say that I tried it, right? I didn't go through all that... before... just to come back and stay the same."
Tsubasa has to hold in a giggle. She isn't mad at Aku's reaction - she gets the anxiety that was probably behind it, and so she can't help but want to laugh, knowing exactly how the struggle was.
"Next Saturday would work great," she smiles. "We're set to be busy for the week, with Friday being the last day, so Saturday would be perfect. You wanna come over just before lunchtime? That way the anxiety isn't building all day long, and you can get settled in before they come over around lunch."
She can't wait. She knew what it was like, the anxiety, having to meet new people. So she didn't want to push Aku too far. But she had this feeling in her heart that it would work out.
"And if you do have to cover at work, no worries. I won't be upset, and they won't be upset. Stuff happens," she smiles.
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My muse is sick, and won’t admit it. Send “You need to rest.” for their reaction.
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Aku smiled to the best of her ability, but the way she chirped out her next words left much to be desired, "Of-- Of course not! Not scary! Not at all!"
To be fair, Tsubasa was by far one of the least scary people she had ever met. But... That didn't mean Tsubasa wasn't scary in her own ways. Though, Aku knew her feelings on that could easily just be because she was so jumpy as a person already. Tsubasa was quiet and not always saying what she thought, Aku believed, and so it would be so easy to... secretly get frustrated with her and not say anything. Aku worried about those sorts of things the most with Tsubasa, but she would never say that out loud. She knew the thought was somewhat ridiculous. She was trying to blindly trust that everything was okay even though there was always this underlying fear in her.
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"I think that if I work hard enough, I might be able to get next Saturday off," Aku continued, eager to shift the conversation over before she was questioned about her reaction. "And provided I don't get called in to cover for someone else, that should be as good a time as any, right?"
"Hey, Aku. Listen to me." Tsubasa offers a gentle smile. "You can't embarrass me. You definitely can't embarrass me more than I embarrass myself," she adds, gently nudging her.
"It's gonna be fine. Let me know your schedule and I'll find a day where we're all off work, and we can hang out at my place. Maybe I can still talk Kariya into cooking," she grins. "You just come over before they do, so you can get comfortable first."
She knows it's going to end up fine. She has a lot of faith in her friends, all three of them. And besides, Uzuki and Kariya already knew how to handle these things. They'd befriended Tsubasa, after all!
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"They'll be happy to get to know you," she gently insists. "And, if they do anything that makes you uncomfortable, you can tell them and they'll stop. I promise. They're good people, really. They're only scary 'cuz they gotta be for work. I mean... I work with them, and I'm not scary, right?"
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Aku flinched hard at having her hand grabbed so suddenly, already feeling raw with fear and on the verge of panic. But the words soothed her just a bit, and she nestled her small body next to Amara's and tried to mimic a perfectly casual smile, and anyone not looking closely at her might have been fooled. Used to looking happy in frightening situations, it seemed, the only hint of her fear was left in her wide, overeager gaze.
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"Thank you," she said softly, and then just a bit louder: "It's been so long since I've seen you! You'll have no idea how busy the store has been lately. Everyone around here's been getting so creative. What have you been up to lately?"
The shadowing figure that she had felt for a while moved along with them, though looking from the outside it was hard to tell if this was legitimate or paranoia. There didn't seem to be any particular amount of attention being paid to Aku, aside from a glance up from his phone from time to time, and that they were moving in the same direction and stopping at the same time could have been complete coincidence.
Aku was going to try very hard not to think about it. As long as she wasn't alone, she was safe, right? Though she worried about pulling a stranger into her trouble...
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Alright. That changed things, then. Here Amara thought the other woman was trying to offer her help... unneeded, turned away with a dismissive wave of the witch's hand. But, the stranger's shuddering fear showed that offer for what it was: an excuse to strike up conversation, dissuade an attack.
Amara certainly couldn't deny her safety. Hand darted out to grab at the stranger's hand, clutching it tightly, tugging her forward. " Walk with me. Act as though you know me... act as though we are having a casual conversation. Let us walk the block until the threat is gone, and then I will ensure you make it home, alright? "
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Aku almost seemed to flinch back, the cottony animal ears at the side of her head drooping almost enough to disappear in her hair. Even with reassurance he was not feeling safe, she could see, and the internal war waging within in him gave her an idea as to why. Wherever he came from normally, it was hostile and painful. She got guests like that sometimes. People that tripped through her gates into other dimensions and came out swinging just because they were so used to it.
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"My name is Aku," she explained, weight shifting to her other foot. "I am... the person who made this place. Though I couldn't really explain to you how. I don't know myself. I... can't really make it out, but... Whoever you're thinking I am, I am not. I'm not from your world. You stepped into one of my doors, you see. I'm told you can't see them from your side, so I suppose it makes sense that you're confused. But I don't want to hurt you. I like opening my doors to the worlds outside my own so I won't be so lonely..."
She turned her head away from him then, to indicate the vast meadow without a single other living thing in sight, save the flora. There were other "doors" scattered about as well, tears that seemed to hang in the air with nothing but a black void on the other side. These doors seemed without guests at the moment, however.
"I'm willing to answer any questions you have," Aku continued, turning just her eyes towards Wraith this time. "And you can hurt me... If you really need to to feel safe..."
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Tainted air instantly replaced with clean. So clean his lungs ached, in a contradictory revolt. Jarring, inducing a panic that had his finger now hovering above the trigger of his gun. He knew those with power had tech he didn't understand. Had seen it before. And he could only assume this one one of them.
But, why? Thoughts racing in the instant after she'd spoken... sure, he'd been picking off the more fortunate. Maybe it was only a matter of time until one of them --- which he had to assume she was --- caught up with him. But in that case, why not just kill him? Why seemingly teleport him to... whatever the hell this place was?
Finger twitched, ready to fire. Suspicion, and stoic fear, made him shift a step back, aim still fixed on the stranger. ' Who the hell is this...? ' A thought among the many questions, of where he could be, what she wanted, and doubting her assurances that he was safe.
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🐝  *  ―  𝑫𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑴𝑺 𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝑵𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻𝑴𝑨𝑹𝑬𝑺 𝑺𝑬𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑵𝑪𝑬 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑺.
❛  last night, i had the craziest dream ...  ❜ ❛  have you ever had a recurring dream?  ❜ ❛  sometimes, my dreams feel more real than reality itself.  ❜ ❛  i wish i could still remember what i dreamt about last night.  ❜ ❛  only thing i remember is that it was a nice dream.  ❜ ❛  do you believe dreams have any deeper meaning?  ❜ ❛  i often wonder what it would be like to live inside my dreams.  ❜ ❛  do you wanna hear about my dream?  ❜ ❛  have you ever experienced lucid dreams where you could control the outcome?  ❜ ❛  i'm telling you, this is all playing out exactly like my dream.  ❜ ❛  what's the strangest dream you ever had?  ❜ ❛  you were part of my dream last night.  ❜ ❛  i think i had this dream before.  ❜ ❛  maybe if i close my eyes i can convince myself that this is only just a dream.  ❜ ❛  looks like you're lost in daydreams again.  ❜ ❛  i'm not sure what this dream was trying to tell me ...  ❜ ❛  can you tell me about your dream?  ❜ ❛  sometimes, i wish i could control my dreams just so i could make them all happy ones.  ❜ ❛  do you ever have dreams that feel so real they're almost like nightmares?  ❜ ❛  calm down. you're okay, you're safe. it was just a dream.  ❜ ❛  i want to help you, but you'll have to tell me what these dreams are about.  ❜ ❛  it felt so real ...  ❜ ❛  i thought you'd said those dreams had stopped.  ❜ ❛  do you have an idea what may cause these nightmares?  ❜ ❛  did you have another nightmare?  ❜ ❛  i just want them to stop ...  ❜ ❛  i wish i could dream of something beautiful or peaceful for a change.  ❜ ❛  can you just hold me tonight? i always sleep better with you here ...  ❜ ❛  do you want to tell me about it?  ❜ ❛  you don't have to stay here tonight. i'm gonna wake up in a few hours because of my nightmares anyway.  ❜ ❛  there has to be a reason for this recurring nightmare ...  ❜ ❛  you just go to sleep. i'll watch over you tonight.  ❜ ❛  this has to be my worst nightmare yet.  ❜
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set the scene setting prompts (but a little more specific) from yours truly.
001, a convenience store past midnight.
002, a hospital waiting room at 3 in the morning.
003, a photoshoot outdoors in the middle of winter.
004, an indoor filming set of a detective's office.
005, a new house/apartment filled with unopened cardboard boxes.
006, a swing set in an empty playground at night.
007, on stage in an empty theatre.
008, inside an old abandoned house.
009, an empty cemetery at night.
010, the arrival hall at an airport.
011, the last train compartment that's not full.
012, the roulette table in a casino.
013, on the deck of a cruise ship.
014, a kitchen during a black out, surrounded by candles.
015, a treehouse in the middle of the woods.
016, on the dance floor during a wedding.
017, behind the chapel before the wedding ceremony starts.
018, backstage during the middle of a concert.
019, a crowded club during a bachelorette party.
020, standing in front of a painting at a museum.
021, a small, intimate family barbecue.
022, a gazebo while it's raining.
023, the back of an empty bus.
024, a hotel room with only one bed.
025, an empty balcony while a party goes on inside.
026, a bar just after closing.
027, an empty sports stadium.
028, lakeside while the sun is setting.
030, an empty stretch of road beside a broken down car.
031, in front of a suspicious pool of blood in an empty parking lot.
032, in the crowd of spectators during an underground fight.
033, a plane during a bout of turbulence.
034, on kiss cam at a sports game.
035, at a table during a charity gala.
036, a masquerade ball.
037, a halloween party in a suburban house.
038, the beach in the late afternoon.
039, a dressing room after a big performance.
040, exploring the depths of a mysterious cave.
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actions speak louder than words non - verbal / action prompts from yours truly. (add a "swap" to swap the sender/receiver in the prompt (or just do it manually).)
back, sender gives receiver a back hug.
beckon, sender beckons receiver closer with a finger.
blood, sender cleans blood off of receiver.
book, sender helps receiver get a book from a higher part of the shelf.
care, sender takes care of receiver when they're sick.
catch, sender catches receiver by the waist after they bump into each other.
choke, sender saves receiver from choking by giving them the heimlich.
cold, sender places their jacket over receiver's shoulders.
cry, sender wipes tears off receiver's face with their thumbs.
dance, sender sticks a hand out to receiver and invites them to dance.
dip, sender skinny dips in front of receiver and invites them to join.
dog, sender's dog pulls them in receiver's direction.
drive, sender drives receiver somewhere in their car.
drag, sender drags receiver into a room and closes the door behind them.
draw, sender draws receiver like one of their french girls.
face, sender turns receiver's face towards them.
flower, sender gives receiver a flower.
footsie, sender initiates footsie with receiver under the table.
forehead, sender presses their forehead against receiver's.
grab, sender grabs receiver's wrist to stop them from leaving.
jump, sender jumps onto receiver's back.
kiss, sender kisses receiver.
link, sender links arms with receiver while walking.
massage, sender offers receiver a massage.
patch, sender patches up receiver's wounds.
piano, sender teaches receiver how to play the piano.
pin, sender pins receiver's hands behind their back.
pluck, sender plucks something out of receiver's hair.
press, sender presses receiver against a wall.
propose, sender proposes to receiver.
quiet, sender gestures for receiver to be quiet.
rest, sender rests their head on receiver's shoulder.
serenade, sender serenades receiver with a song.
sign, sender walks into a sign and receiver sees.
size, sender measures the size of their hand against receiver's.
shoes, sender removes receiver's shoes for them.
sun, sender rubs sunblock onto receiver's back.
tattoo, sender gives receiver a tattoo.
tie, sender helps tie receiver's tie.
tuck, sender tucks receiver's hair behind their ear.
umbrella, sender lets receiver under their umbrella.
warning, sender presses a knife against receiver's neck as a warning.
zip, sender needs receiver's help to zip up the back of their dress.
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Aku shook her head, following along behind Tsubasa and making sure to keep herself tucked just out of the way of other people, "No, that's okay. I just think it might be a little much for me for a first meeting, even with cute little animals. Your house could be okay, I think. I just... I'm worried I'm going to be a disappointment, you know how I am. It's hard because I usually am... At least at work anyway... Not that I hate it or anything! I think my boss probably has a point, and it'd likely be an issue no matter where I work. I can't let my health go just because I like sweets."
Truly meeting new people almost felt like it was too much for her altogether. She wanted to hide in herself and let the world pass her by like she always had, but if she did that, she never would have met Tsubasa. No matter how badly she got hurt, or even if it meant being miserable for the rest of her life, she knew she had to try to meet new people. At the end of the day, that seemed to be the big take away from the Game she'd played. Her partner had mistreated her all up until the last couple of days of the game, but because she forced herself to suffer through that and didn't give up, they had won. She was more afraid than ever now, sickness twisting in her gut every time she was outside and around other people, but sometimes it would just be worth it, even if it meant curling up in her room and crying through the night afterwards.
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"If you can arrange something, I'll do my best not to embarrass you," she added softly, though her shoulders dropped as she realized that had probably been the wrong thing to say.
"Your boss can...can...just shut up!" Tsubasa pouts. "And if your boss doesn't like it, I'll help you find a better boss. Mhm!"
Her shyness took a backseat to sticking up for her friends. Sure, in...in scary situations, maybe she'd still be timid, but... Well, she had to encourage Aku when she could! That's what friends do!
"And hey, it'll be okay. I promise." She smiles, quickly ordering for the two of them and paying for it all before turning her attention back to her friend. "Uzuki and Kariya ask about you, you know. They know I hang out with you in my off time, and ask if you're doing alright. They'd totally love to get to know you too."
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"We can all hang out at my place, if that makes you more comfortable. Or, if you want to try something new," she gently offers, "and you like animals, Uzuki has a pet bunny at her and Kariya's apartment. You don't have to, but it is an option. They won't mind at all. Ohhh, and I bet Kariya would make his awesome ramen for us all..."
But she realizes she's getting carried away, and quickly feels the need to apologize.
"Heheh, sorry. Got a little carried away. But they're totally normal people outside of work, promise."
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🍓 @rubiesintherough asked: 🍓
🍓 “I’m fine. I don’t need your help.” ( amara ) 🍓
Hurt/Comfort Starters
🍓~🐑~🍓
"I know... But..." Aku clasped her hands together at her chest. She felt like she was about to cry, stuck between a rock and a hard place. "I know you probably don't, but... But-- uh, I... I need your help... Plea-- I'm sorry. I know it's annoying it's just..."
A shiver ran up Aku's spine as she turned her head just enough to glance over her shoulder and snap it forward again, back to staring hard at her balled hands. She didn't like to look. She didn't want to look at it. She felt like surely she must have been going crazy, but she was almost certain she'd seen that exact same guy leaning against the wall like that for the past several streets. He was always looking at her. It was the exact same one every time. Every time.
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"I'm sorry," she nearly whimpered. "B-but I thhhhink I'm being follo-followed... Please help me..."
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🍓 @rubiesintherough asked: 🍓
🍓 "What happened to your face?" ( page ) 🍓
Questioning Sentences
🍓~🐑~🍓
"I-I'm okay..." Aku muttered and raised a hand to cover her face. "I just-- uh, I-- I had an accident at work today. But I'm fine, really..."
God, this was so embarrassing. To be asked about such a thing in public, where everyone could see... It was almost as bad as receiving the room, in which some delinquents were messing around in the store and threw a product at her face. Well... They probably weren't trying to hit her, but now she had a black eye and everyone in the store had seen it. And now she was being asked about it. God.
She wanted to crawl under a rock...
Eyes trailed nervously to the side where a noise was crawling closer to her. She didn't know them by that name, though. Souls that hunted down the recently departed, now hounding at the back of her neck, drawn by her negativity. But all she knew of them were that they were the monsters that haunted her when she was feeling bad. She didn't know they were real.
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"I kinda just... Wanna go home. But... Thanks for your concern. Really."
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🍓 @rubiesintherough asked: 🍓
🍓 [ 𝐩𝐢𝐭𝐲 ] : sender spares receiver's life. ( wraith? ) 🍓
Horrors Memes
🍓~🐑~🍓
The wastelands that Wraith called home had very suddenly dissipated around him, giving way to an empty, oversaturated meadow with rolling green hills and trees suspended throughout the air. The first thing he had come in contact with had been a young woman with fluffy pink lamb's ears and a bright, glowing third eye. He hadn't even been given the time to blink, the surrounding area changing so suddenly it might have even caused some vertigo.
And when she approached him, reading him with the glowing eye, it was really no wonder that the first action would be to defend himself. To have his weapon trained on her, to have her life dangling in his hands. Surely he could not know that attacking her would not kill her. But she remained still, and simply smiled at him, and she gave him time to calm down.
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"I will not hurt you," she said softly, searching his thoughts. "My world will not harm you. You are safe... I promise."
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🐑 Inbox Call 🐑
{Please like this post and I'll send you some memes. Be sure to reply with which muse you'd like me to send from. If you don't specify, I'll just randomize it and send whoever! ^^}
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