Last Seen Blogs
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Two elderly women visiting the graves of their dead parents in the Appalachian Mountains sit on the headstones and talk, 1983 - by David Turnley (1955), American/French
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Edit after Joseph Vernet, Robert Sayer and John Bowles & Son (A Sea Storm) (Metropolitan Museum of Art)
(Ed. Lic.: CC BY-NC 3.0)
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Frederick Judd Waugh (American, 1861-1940), Ebbing Waters. Oil on canvas, 29.5 x 36 in
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A Brocken spectre within glory rings
Photographed by Brocken Inaglory
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realizing my s/o might be a covert narcissist 🙃
#dear diary#she's been ignoring me for 5 days bc she didn't like that i voiced being hurt over something she did#only sent me one message that implied she was spiraling mentally and our argument had caused it#hasn't replied to anything i've sent since#and the thing is#i would have been panicked and apologizing and groveling if this were 3/4 years ago#but now she's done this so many times that i'm just tired#like#i can't even get angry anymore#i don't feel guilty like i used to even though there's a part of me that wants to believe this is my fault and i should have just said noth#but no#we've been through this too many times not to realize she does this every single time no matter how gently or calmly i bring up an issue#like “oh yeah so you picked the movie we watched last time so this time is my turn”#and she pouts and sighs and basically acts like it's the end of the world and passive-aggressively says she wants to watch this other show#and like yeah i'm usually down to compromise and give in and let her decide but i do that all the time#and she never does for me#so i was firm and said i really wanted to watch this particular movies#i'd had it in mind in particular because it was the holidays and a christmas movie and i'd been looking forward to watching it with her#and even told her so and she acted so enthusiastic#but then it's time to watch it and she guilts and emotionally beats me down into picking what she wants#and she does this with so many things#and acts like a victim if i'm firm or say no or just try to disengage from the situation or i calmly disagree#and especially if i bring up instances where this has happened before ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE#she gets defensive and lies and victimizes herself and tells me i'm overreacting and i have no idea how hard things are for HER#so why can't i just shut up and do things the way she wants to???#and then i end up feeling like i'm going crazy and getting defensive myself because she does this so much that i'm immediately tense#and trying to both be firm in how i feel but calm her emotions and her reactions#but she claims i'm the one being aggressive or being mean to her and “ruining our fun” because i'm not sugarcoating things
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if you open your mouth youll catch someone elses breath in it
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i feel like my veins are full of molten lead like i am being drip fed anger until i am too full to tell left from right
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