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moneyformama · 6 years
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“My toddler eats everything”...tips for table  manners and habits:
I always thought that because I was a relatively healthy eater, my children were bound to be the same way--but wow, was I wrong or what. I soon came to learn that from the age that babies start eating solids, they also start to become picky. In my mind I also had the vision that every homemade baby food that I had slaved over to prepare and store my baby would eat. This was also false. Getting young ones to eat what they need to in order to receive the best nutrition can become a battle that seems lost 90% of the time. 
I still remember the first time I fed my son homemade apple sauce and he spit it right in my face. Apple sauce? I mean that seems like a given. However, he was a wild card and the things that I assumed he would love, he usually didn't. He even liked store bought baby foods over mine. Yes, my pride took a huge hit but the perfectionist in me was bound and determined to get him the nutrition he needed regardless if he wanted it or not. So how do we as moms have the right balance of being too strict and pushing them away from healthy food as adults, or being too lenient and causing them to become overweight and unhealthy. 
Taste buds really do play a huge and unchangeable role in what we are automatically drawn too when it comes to food. However, even though each one of us likes a different varieties of foods, we can train our taste buds to have a widened pallet. Here is an example: as a child I absolutely hated yellow squash. It was a combination of the taste as well as the texture. Nonetheless, my family ate a lot of squash and so overtime I started to become used to the taste and texture and now as an adult I really love yellow squash. 
I think it is so important to give our kids a widened pallet at a young age so by the time they can talk, they don't sit at the dinner table and beg for mac n’ cheese and hotdogs every single meal. Not only is cooking dinner a hard and long task, it seems like even more work when your kids won't eat what you have prepared for them. Not only that but this will save you loads of fights with your children and disappointment when it comes to being guests at someones house for dinner and your child throws a fit about the vegetable on his or her plate. Lets gracefully and lovingly teach our babies to eat what is set before them. 
Before I begin let me clarify that I am by no means perfect at this, and I most definitely do not have it all figured out. These are simply tips that have worked for my toddler, and have made my life and my husbands life a million times easier when it comes to snack and meal times. Every child is different and maybe this method will not work on my daughter. 
Baby food: Around 4 to 6 months when you start to introduce your baby to solids, introduce a food and if your baby refuses to eat it, fine let them. Do not force them to eat it, but instead every few days rotate that food in. They will probably only try one bite and maybe even spit it out, but the important lesson is that they try it and are getting their taste buds used to different textures and flavors. Continue this method until they are paste the baby food stage and are ready for real food.
Once your baby is eating food that has not been ground up into baby food, it is time for the next step. By this time your baby probably has some sass, they most likely know exactly what they are doing when they spit food in your face...and if they are anything like my little man they will laugh. Because of these traits, it is safe to say that your baby is old enough to know yes and no and is grasping what a consequence is. 
Staying seated until the meal is over: Offer your child a variety of foods. Make sure one food is a food that he or she has liked in the past. Set the plate of food in front of your baby, and if he or she refuses to eat it, allow them to get down and go play (but not until after dinner time is over). This is another very important point. Dinner time is the time that you set. It is a time where your child must stay seated and behave until the time is up. Whether it is as a family or not, it is important that dinner time is different than snack time. This will give you freedom to eat out at restaurants without your child winning to get down and throwing a tantrum when you won't let him play five minutes after he sat down. We only allow Tatum to leave his high chair when we do. That means if we have a long slow dinner, then so does he. 
Tough love time: Okay, now this is the hard part. This is the part that you are not going to like, the part that makes you feel guilty and question whether or not you are a cold hearted person, or if you are a saint. Here we go: If your child comes up and asks for a snack or is hungry again, offer him the same meal that they refused to eat. Sit them back down in their high chair, heat it up (if need be) and allow him to either eat the meal or refuse it again. If he refuses again, keep repeating this step until your child caves or becomes hungry enough to eat it. 
By offering multiple food choices and one that you know for sure your child likes, you are giving them ample choice and freedom. Eventually, your baby and soon to be toddler will think nothing of sitting nicely during a full meal, and two, eating what is on their plate without complaint. Now, of course there will be the occasional “training days” as my husband calls them, but like i said its the occasional not the everyday. The first few weeks will be so hard. You will feel like giving up, but i promise you this; one weak moment will lead to a weak day and then a weak week. By this time your child will know that you will crumble and the last month of tears will be for nothing. So I say this to you from experience and from great results...be strong momma and you won't regret it!
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moneyformama · 6 years
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Bringing home baby...when you have a toddler
Bringing home a new baby is a huge adjustment for everyone in the family, and for the sibling it is often the hardest. Although the adjusting is a given, smoothly transitioning your toddler into the role as a nice big brother or sister is key to an easier experience. Here are some practical ways in which you can start using on your firstborn. 
1. When you first become pregnant and decide to tell your child, tell them in an excited tone. Tell them that they will GET to become a big sibling and it will partly be their job to take care of the new baby. Give them a sense of entitlement on being the older sibling, so that when the baby comes they will feel responsible for being a role model. 
2. Throughout your pregnancy talk about the baby with your firstborn even if he or she cannot talk back. When your belly has grown and becomes an obvious bump, explain that the baby is growing in the belly and soon the baby will be out of the belly. My son could not talk, but I could tell that he knew for the most part what I meant. Yes, it was no doubt confusing for him but talking about it often made it less of a surprise when his little sister arrived. 
3. When the baby is born, have a gift ready from the older sibling to the baby and vise-versa. Start a kindness train from the get-go. Obviously the baby won't care about the gift, but your toddler will be excited to give the baby something and even more excited to receive something, Automatically, much of the upcoming animosity and jealousy will be extinguished before it grows. 
Don’t be surprised if your toddler gives you the cold-shoulder for a day or two. 
When we had Nora, I was eager to see her meet her big brother Tatum. I was picturing in my mind this perfect reunion of siblings. He would be excited to meet her (maybe even ask to hold her) and we would tear up and have a magical parent moment. However, this was not at all the case. Instead, Tatum walked in the hospital room and did not once look at me. I asked my husband to put him up on the bed so I could give him a hug and my normally affectionate two year old cried when I touched him. Broken hearted, I let him run out of the room into his grandparents arms while I cried in despair. Under less exhausting circumstances this incident would not have been the end of the world, but after having a baby my emotions were running high. The next day, we proceeded to come home and as I prepared for Tatum’s reaction, I waited for him to come through our front door. When he finally did, he ran over to me and jumped into my lap. All was well and he acted like nothing had happened the previous day. He held his sister, and loved on his mamma. My heart was complete. 
It has been almost two months since Nora’s arrival into our family. Tatum has had his moments of jealousy but overall he has adjusted well. Adjusting to two little ones can often feel like your being torn in half. You are so used to being able to give one child all of your love and attention, and bringing another baby into the mix is tough. Nevertheless, it is possible to make it easier. I hope my story gives you a little hope and confidence in bringing home your little bundle of joy!
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moneyformama · 6 years
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How to keep your house clean (with little kids)
If your reading this, your curious on how its possible to even survive with little kids let alone keep your house clean. Trust me, I am in the same boat. Some days I can hardly get the breakfast dishes clean and by the end of the evening, the whole sink is piled high with crusty, pots and pans. With this method there will still be those impossible days, but it will make those days just a little less impossible and a little less chaotic. I have found that a little bit of discipline often goes a long ways, it is so easy to let go of everything because you already have let go of most household chores. This is our perfectionistic tendencies. It is the tendency to either be completely put together, or let every single little thing get out of control. This allows us to fail perfectly...or feel as though we are failing even though we are not.
Balancing bathtime time, housework, bills, cooking, grocery shopping and playtime is an impossible balancing act. We as parents or more specifically, moms, just cannot possibly do everything at once. This is why keeping our house clean (not always picked up) but clean, can make us feel so productive. As a stay-at-home mom I am home 90% of my life these days, and so the environment that I am in the most can also be the place that stresses me the most. I know, I know, your thinking but lady I have three young children, a baby and a dog that brings mud into the house every time he comes through the doggy door. And to this I say, yes I don't know what you are going through, I only have two kids under three years old and my dog is hardly in my house due to my rough little toddler man. What I do know is that no matter what your story this method will work the same for you as it would for someone with no kids, no husband and even no dog.
Alright, lets get to it.
Every day: Every single morning before 10 o'clock, find time to spiff up the house. This shouldn't be too hard if you do to what I will tell you in step 2. Always finish cleaning up breakfast, and then run around and pick up the house. Make the beds, and fold blankets ect. 
Once a week: Deep Clean
Monday: One day a week (I choose Monday) is laundry day. Do all your loads of laundry throughout the day. Put a movie on for the kids, or have them color while you fold. Make it a fun, relaxing day as much as you can. Usually, I just serve leftovers for lunch and keep putsing along with my routine. 
If you deep clean a few rooms once a week, it never becomes too overwhelming. We will keep this short and simple:
Tuesday: Kitchen appliances, cupboards and grease off kitchen walls (if necessary). 
Wednesday: Bathrooms, dusting and mirrors. 
Thursday:  Vacuum and mop all floors. 
Friday: Pick one thing to organize, it doesn't have to be a long project. Just try to work on it for an hour if possible. 
Saturday & Sunday: Play and relax:)
Once a month: Deeper clean
One day a month I do a even deeper clean. This cleaning day is meant for the chores that you dread the most. Luckily it is only one day a month so you don't need to dread it every single week! Here are some chores I do on this important cleaning day. 
Wash the rugs: I feel like rugs often get thrown aside when it comes to daily cleaning. Sure we vacuum the bigger rugs that do not get sucked into the vacuum cleaner and bust your belt. Oh yeah and the bathroom rugs don't usually look dirty, so we often shake them out and put them back nice and neat. But...as with anything in our house when we have children, who knows what is on the rugs. This is why once a month I wash the rugs on delicate and hang them to dry. 
Tube it up: Put the tube on the vacuum and clean the ceiling corners, fans, light fixtures, baseboards and closets. 
Clean chairs and couches: I don't know about your couch but mine is often smeared with snot, spit, snacks and lets be honest--even a little pee during potty training sessions. My kitchen chairs are also grimy and sticky with spagetti and fruit residue. This requires heavy scrubbing. 
Every six months:
Clean out cupboards: My cupboards seem to get very unorganized even in a week, and as much as I would like to say that I clean out my cupboards every month or even three--I generally don't get around to it. So this is why I shoot for the six month mark. I clean out the sippy cup/ bottle drawer and throw away unlatching tupperware. Wipe down and vacuum the inside of every drawer, nook and cranny. 
Organize closets: I have far too many clothes, so every six months I pack away my summer clothes, and bring out my fall and winter clothes. Then in another six months I repeat the previous. This way my closet is less cluttered and my winter coats are not collecting unnecessary dust. Also, the feeling of getting out your clothes that you haven’t seen in six months is almost like gaining a new wardrobe! 
Kids change sizes so often that you may be getting out and packing away their clothes much more frequently. So if you have already been keeping up on their wardrobe, use this time to look through shoes, wrong sized diapers, hair accessories and other fun things that we tend to collect and keep as mothers. 
Wash carpets: I love this task because more than any other cleaning chore, this chore makes me feel the most productive. There is nothing greater than the feeling of newly washed carpets. Luckily, my mother has an industrial carpet cleaner, but if you have to rent one from your local store or Walmart, it really is worth it. I am always so surprised at how dirty the water in the carpet cleaner is after just one swipe. I usually do one sweep with Dawn Dish soap and Oxyclean. The second sweep I just use water and try to remove all soaps. 
Alright, all done. Now you can easily stay ahead of the dust, dirt and extra stuff lying around your house. If you stick to this schedule, I guarantee you will not be overwhelmed when a surprise visit from friends or family happens...because without fail, company always comes when our house is the messiest!
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moneyformama · 6 years
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Sleep training your baby
Sleep training can be very overwhelming, take it from someone who has been there. With our first born, my husband and I spent countless nights debating if we should stick to our sleep training routine, or cave and stay up all night holding our new baby. We opted for the cry-it-out method. This method may seem harsh to some parents, however, if don't correctly there will be less tears in the long run. 
Once your baby is sleep trained, crying for longer than ten minutes will be a rarity. It took our son Tatum, a few weeks to become an independent sleeper with a regular bedtime. I cannot tell you what a relief it is when you put your child to bed and they enjoy their crib. By the time Tatum was a two months old, he was sleeping in his own room in his crib. He would go to bed at 7 and only wake up once or sometimes twice to eat. After eating, he would go straight back to sleep--no countless hours of rocking and bouncing (unless he was not feeling well). He is now two years old and when he goes to bed, he does not cry and hasn't for a long time now. 
We now have a two month old baby, she is already sleep trained and in her own room and crib. We began sleep training when she was one month old, and she now only wakes up once in the night to eat. 
If you are on the fence about how to get your baby to sleep independently, give this method a shot for just one week and I promise you won't regret it. 
Sleep training 101:
It is important to establish a good bedtime routine. This does not mean that you can't be flexible when you are out and about but it does give your child a sense of stability when they are home. As a family we start winding down around seven o'clock, this means less rough housing and more snuggling. 
For the toddler: At 7:45 we lather him up with lotion before putting on snuggle pajamas. Then sometimes we will try to read a book if he is into it. At 8:00 sharp (no exceptions) we put him down in his bed and turn on his night light which he absolutely loves. I recommend this Fisher Price Glow Seahorse, it plays music while lighting up-its been a must for our family. We then say a prayer for him and say our goodnights. 
He loves his bedtime routine and knows that he cannot get out of bedtime. Because of this established nightly routine, he goes to sleep without a fight. 
For the baby: For our two month old, Nora, we have to be a bit more flexible. I try to nurse her around 7:30 and then rock her until 8. However, its important not to rock the baby to sleep. Just rock and snuggle until the baby is drowsy but still awake. At 7:45, I put on pajamas and a clean diaper and then proceed to snuggle and rock. Once I can tell that she is drowsy and ready to go to sleep I swaddle her. I use this Miracle Swaddle, and I would never use anything else. I also give her a pacifier and turn on a nighttime song as well as her nightlight. I notice a huge difference if I have a nightlight in her room, she seems much more comfortable. 
Cry-it-out: We then proceed with our goodnights and a prayer. I shut the door and wait. If she starts to cry, we wait 10 minutes and then go into her room to soothe her (without picking her up). If she stops crying when I lean over and talk to her, I know she is not gassy or uncomfortable but instead she is fighting sleep. In this case, I leave and repeat step one. 
However, if she does continue to cry when I soothe her, I pick her up and check her diaper. If this still does not work, I feed her again, burp her and then lay her down to sleep. 
If she cries for longer than 30 minutes with us soothing her every 10 minutes, I un-swaddle her and rock her until drowsy again. The first week, your baby might cry for the full 30 minutes but by week two it becomes more uncommon than not. 
In the middle of the night, when Nora wakes up to eat, I continue with this same routine. She rarely ever cries, but when she does I rock her until drowsy just like I do before bedtime. 
Naps: I let my babies nap wherever they want the first three months, but after three months I use this same technique during nap time with the exception of the 30 minute rule. I do soothe every 10 minutes still, but depending on how tired my child is, I gauge how long they need to try to fall asleep. If it becomes a situation where your child hates napping because they are not tired and they do not want to sit bored in their crib, heck give them a book or a toy to play with. The most important lesson is not that they have to nap if they are not tired, but it is to give them a time of quiet (and you) throughout the day. This time is a good time for rest and relaxation, that is often even more of a necessity for us as parents.  
Stay strong: It is so easy to give up and stick the baby in bed with you just so you can get a wink of sleep. I know how horrible it is to run off zero hours of sleep, but I promise you--if you do the hard thing now, it will pay off later. I have friends who's children still do not sleep through the night, and guess what? Not one of those friends sleep trained their baby to fall asleep independently and self-soothe. It is so important for your child to have the confidence to be able to self-soothe. Obviously when my children are not feeling well, I throw all self-soothing out the window. I stay up all night, rock them and soothe them the best I can. But when they are feeling good, and the only reason they aren't sleeping is because they want to sleep next to you or on you, it is okay to teach them independence. 
Don't feel guilty for teaching good habits, and most importantly stay strong!
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moneyformama · 6 years
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My journey with severe baby eczema
My firstborn suffered with severe, severe baby eczema. Now I'm not talking about a few stubborn patches of dry skin that occasionally itch and look bad; no, I'm talking about 24/7 misery. Like most moms in my situation, I started researching like crazy what I could do to relieve my little ones itch. However, as the days and months creeped by, I could not seem to help my baby. As you know, there is nothing worse than seeing your child in pain. Even worse, is when you cannot help them. My prayer is that through my story and journey, it might help you through yours.
It all started when my baby was about two months old. We were in the middle of moving and he started having dry patches on his face. I could tell it bothered him but he was too little to really scratch. By three moths he was trying to itch his skin and seemed to be more irritated than normal. Prior to this he was the easiest, most joyful baby so I automatically knew it was more uncomfortable than it looked.
As a baby I also struggled with severe eczema and my mother discovered like so many it was due to food allergies as well as outside allergies like (dust, animals and basically everything in between). By age 4, I was able to live a normal life without gloves taped to my hands and bags under my eyes from exhaustion. By the grace of God, I grew out of my food allergies completely with the exception of peanuts. Now at the age of 24, I have grown out of most of my outdoor allergies. Because of my first had experience with allergies I automatically thought that my son Tatum most likely had the same allergies as I did.
Diet: I started cutting out the basic foods that cause inflammation and allergies in most people including myself as a child. These included; eggs, dairy, wheat and nuts. For two months I was very strict with this diet, we saw three natural paths and dermatologists, yet despite their efforts we saw no change for the better. Instead, Tatum continually became worse. We were given a steroid cream that would provide temporary relief but not enough to last longer than a day. After using it on his face just a handful of times, it stopped working completely.
Topical: I tried different cleanses and every lotion and oil you could think of--Eucerin, Cetephil, Coconut Oil, Castor Oil, Aveeno, CeraVe and many more--yet nothing cleared his skin. Eucerin Original Healing (the thick white cream) helped us the most. After soaking Tatum in filtered water for his bath for 15 minutes we would then lather him with Eucerin and dress him in 100% cotton pajamas. This did not heal the eczema by any means, but it did seem to relieve him for a few hours. Day after day we continued our routine and focused on surviving this time in our lives. 
He was about five months by this time and I decided to also cut out sugar and all caffeine. I was only eating meat and vegetables with the exception of nightshades (tomatoes, potatoes, eggplants, bell peppers).  By the time he was 6 months old, he was so miserable that he would cry at least 60% of the day. Desperation set in for my husband and I. We were at the brink of a nervous breakdown and everything felt hopeless. No doctor cold seem to help us and we were at our wits end. I was still breastfeeding and so I decided to stop breastfeeding and try formulas. 
Gloves and swaddles: Two products that did give us tremendous relief from itching were silk gloves that we found on Amazon. They are ScratchMeNot Flip Mitten Sleeves. We would cut the gloves off and tape them with Duct tape to secure them. He wore them all day so that his hands could be free. Another product that we bought on Amazon was the Miracle Swaddle. The name couldn't be more accurate. We would not have slept at all if it wasn't for this product. We could swaddle him at night and because he could not itch, he was able to sleep a few consecutive hours at a time. 
Formulas: First, we tried a homemade beef liver formula from Weston A. Price Foundation. He was solely on this for three weeks, with no change. He hated it and because it wasn't working I decided to move forward with something else. Our second option was raw milk. I had researched that many people that were sensitive to pasteurized milk could withstand raw milk. We chose goats milk instead of cows, due to the research supporting easier digestion with goats dairy. Two ounces down and Tatum immediately started getting a rash around his mouth, within minutes his throat was closing shut. I called 911 and gave I'm a dosage of Benadryl. Luckily, by the time the ambulance had arrived, he was breathing easier. I was traumatized and felt completely hopeless.
The third formula we tried was Similac Alimentum, which hydrolyzes the proteins tricking your body into thinking it is not protein. We chose this because we thought that maybe Tatum had a protein allergy, not just to meat, dairy or other proteins but to the actual protein in human breast milk. This condition is extremely rare and usually those who have it would have blood in their bowl movements or throw up after eating. Even though the symptoms didn't match up, we thought it was worth a try. After a month of being on the Alimentum, we started seeing a difference. His eczema was healing, but he was still itching. He had been itchy for so long that his mind tricked itself into thinking his skin was still itching. We continued to have him wear gloves, but he would soon be crawling and gloves would not be practical. 
Healing: By the time we started seeing a real difference in Tatum’s skin, he was ten months old. He was finally smiling and acting like the little boy we had missed for so long. The road to full recovery was long but we knew this hardship had not only made him tougher, but it had strengthened our relationship as parents. I can't tell you what a relief it was to take off his gloves for longer than a few minutes for the first time. I still remember where we were at the time, sitting in the car rejoicing at the healing God had done. Although we still do not know exactly what helped Tatum, I hope our journey gives you comfort and peace knowing that their is an end in site. 
Tatum is now two years old, and thriving. He can now eat every food except peanuts. We give him dairy in small amounts because he does break out in eczema if he has too much. The leaps and bounds of progress made is incredible and possible. Stay strong mama, it will end. 
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moneyformama · 6 years
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How to take professional quality  newborn photos at home
If your anything like me you would much rather take professional photos of your newborn at home. There are a few reasons we all want this:
 1. Germs: Our little Nora was born in the beginning of January; right smack in the middle of flu season, not to mention the worst flu epidemic in the last eight years. As you can imagine, I was overly protective. We didn't go anywhere for the first month, and the last thing I was thinking about was booking a newborn photography session. Heres the deal, you just brought our newborn baby home and the last thing you need is your little bundle of joy catching a miserable cold. There is nothing worse than a newborn who has a stuffy nose and cannot breath to eat, or sleep--the only two necessities in this stage of their life. 
2. Time: It is hard enough to get out of the house with a newborn, and add a toddler to the mix--and it is close to impossible. The first few weeks with little Nora, I felt completely incapable of going to town with two children. My oldest was a little over two years old and even though he was well behaved, I was still terrified to even take them both to the store. Even though this was my second child, I felt as though I knew nothing all over again. I was thrown back into beginners mode--Googling every problem I convinced myself that Nora may have. Because being a mother is more than a full time job, I wanted to keep my full time job as simple as possible. If that meant staying home and skipping a trip to town with two littles, I was game for that. 
3. Convenience: taking your children's milestone photos at home is convenient. Usually newborn photos are taken within the first two weeks in order to ensure your baby sleeps long enough to cooperate and also to capture them at their youngest age. Unfortunately, the first two weeks as a new mother feels like the most important, and overwhelming two weeks of your entire life. Often times your babies “wake” and “eat” times are unpredictable and when you take photos at your own home, you can also move at your own pace. No cancelling a session or apologizing for being late. Heck, you can eve stay in your sweats all day and wait until your baby is fast asleep to snap a few pictures.
4. Cost: As much as we wish this wasn't a factor, it is. I love pictures, in fact my iPhone has at least 1,500 pictures on it at all times. I also love professional photography for special occasions and I do love to support photographers. However, when us moms have the ability to take pictures that are professional looking photos and save a few hundred dollars--why not? I mean lets be honest, in our kids lives we will have so many opportunities to have professional portraits taken, so lets not feel guilty for saving money on just one session. 
Okay so now lets talk about how to go about these pictures.
Lighting: The key is to have good lighting. If you have a big window in your house, your best lighting is generally in the closest wall corner to that window. You want the light to be present, but not shining directly on your little one. I have the best luck mid-morning, the sun is generally uncovered by clouds and is not directly shining in my largest window. 
Camera: I used my iPhone 6 but any smart phone with a quality camera will do. My husbands Android actually takes better pictures but I am not familiar with editing on his phone so I stuck to my good ‘ol phone. 
PICTURE
Tricks and Tips: Next, make sure your infant has just ate and went to the bathroom. This will ensure your won't have any messes on your furniture! Warm your hands under hot water, and then strip your little one down and put on her photography clothing. I chose to do naked pictures and put different bows on Nora. Positions and angles make all the difference, move your baby so that he or she looks comfortable. One trick to make their lips pucker is to stick a pacifier in the mouth and then remove it right before you snap the picture. I layed a Boppy pillow down and then covered it with a dark fuzzy blanket. This way Nora was secure and cozy. 
PICTURE
Editing: I don't have a fancy editing program, and for good reason...most cost and arm and a leg. However, I do have a Macbook Pro and in order to do touch ups (as in baby acne blemishes ect.) I had to use my computer. For all the other edits I could use my iPhones editing system. I wanted each picture to look alike and to have the same lighting/contrast and other specifications. In order to do this I manually picked different edits. Below are the ones I chose: 
PICTURES
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