modestyandetiquette
Modesty and Etiquette
Piety - Mildness - Courtesy - Reserve
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If you know you would rather have the baby killed than be pregnant, no matter your reasoning, you shouldn’t be having sex. If you would rather have the baby killed than be a father, no matter your reasoning, you shouldn’t be having sex.
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If you're a smoker, including someone who vapes, ask permission before smoking around others. Don't assume everyone around you is okay with it.
More people than you'd expect have severe asthma or allergies that cause strong adverse reactions to being around smoke. Assuming everyone around you is okay with it can cause someone's asthma or allergies to act up and harm them. Also, if someone doesn't want second hand smoke, because even second hand smoke can cause health problems, that's their right to not want to be exposed to second hand smoke.
But it's always more polite to smoke away from others and down wind rather than smoking close to others, especially if you don't know how they feel about someone smoking by them.
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In case no one told you growing up
Bras last longer if you let them air dry. Don’t put them in the dryer.
If you have a problem with frizzy hair, don’t dry your hair with a towel. It makes the frizzies worse. (I recently read an article that said to use a t-shirt? I brush mine out and let it air dry.)
Whites wash best in hot water. Everything else can be in cold - save on your electricity bill.
You can kill 99.9% of germs in a sponge by putting it in the dishwasher for a cycle or by microwaving it for 2 min (be sure to make the sponge damp before microwaving and to put a cup half full of water in with it and please DO NOT squeeze the sponge until it has cooled off)
Airing out your room/house and letting sunlight in every so often can decrease the number of household pests like silverfish and ants.
Black underwear is best during your period as stains are less likely to be visible.
To save money, put aside 10% of each paycheck into a savings account. It’ll add up.
Unless your hair has something on/in it (like grease or mud or something), using conditioner first can actually be the better choice. The conditioner holds in the good oils that help you hair look sleek and beautiful, which shampoo would otherwise wash away.
Speaking of shampoo - if you have long hair, washing just the bits that touch your scalp is generally enough. The rest of your hair gets cleaned with just the run off from your scalp.
If you put a tampon in and it’s uncomfortable/you can feel it, you didn’t do it quite right. A properly placed tampon is virtually unnoticeable by the wearer.
Apply deodorant/antiperspirant a couple hours in advance of when you need it. This gives the product the chance to block your sweat glands. Using deodorant just before going somewhere where you’ll sweat (this means walking outside for people in high humidity places) results in your sweat washing the deodorant off and starkly limiting its usefulness.
After running the dryer, use the dryer sheet from that load to brush out the lint catch - it gets everything off in a fraction of the time it’ll take you to get it clean with your bare hands. Paper towels also work well.
Wash your face everyday, or as often as possible. Forget which brand of cleanser is best. Just washing your face everyday will guarantee you clearer skin. And do you best not to pop pimples, as tempting as the urge may be.
Fold laundry asap after taking it from the dryer to avoid wrinkles. This may seem obvious for dress shirts and silly for things like t-shirts, but you’ll notice the difference even then once your shirts stop looking like unfolded paper balls.
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the same men expecting a submissive & feminine woman and whining that men used to be leaders and providers are the first to complain about things like making the first move and paying for dates. like sir? how are you supposed to be a provider with no provisions—
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And you did it again!
You were the one who started talking about being able to tell men and women apart, not me.
You, and everyone else in this thread, were also the ones who said that only men seem to be allowed to dress comfortably.
My point remains: why are those ridiculous dresses only ever compared to mens clothing rather than real womens clothing. Men get away with dressing however they wish, regardless of occasion, while women - according to the spirit of this thread - are expected to choose between bikinis and sweatpants. That is a false dichotomy that is both ridiculous and offensive. Dresses can be just as elegant and modest as a mans suit, and as comfortable and functional as whatever Hemmsworth was wearing.
Degrading
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How fast smut has inflitrated books, mostly bestsellers aimed at young girls and young adults is very concerning. Back in the day it was mostly just to be found in fanfics and doujinshis and stuff like that and frowned upon by the public.
Now the consens has shifted to being completely fine with hardcore stuff put in fantasy books and the like with no warning whatsoever on the covers. This is absolutely irresponsible from the publishers.
I don't wanna name names, but it's definitely the fault of booktok and how smut has infiltrated any form of mainstream media.
Booktok was a mistake.
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Please remember that you can be selective about agreeing with someone. Being aware that they made a good point doesn't mean you've betrayed your values. It just means you are aware that nothing is black or white. And that's a good thing. Listening and being able to civil is how problems get solved.
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Eve being created as Adam's helper does not mean she was created to be his slave. Sorry to burst your bubble trad dudes
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It is arrogance in us to call frankness, fairness, and chivalry ‘masculine’ when we see them in a woman; it is arrogance in them to describe a man’s sensitiveness or tact or tenderness as ‘feminine.’
C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
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If he won't make any effort to win you, he certainly won't make any effort to keep you.
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learning lately that a lot of confidence is about owning up. like "yeah i'm a little addicted to my phone right now" or "yeah i'm not really over this person yet" or "yeah i still get pretty anxious in crowds" just saying anything at all but then following it up w "but i'm trying to get better" and being super nonchalant and unaffected. so powerful. you would literally be undefeatable in the face of even the most judgmental person. no one can judge you for things you already know about yourself and are trying to improve on. the trick is to know yourself from the inside out, to hold yourself accountable, and to actively improve every day. like that is literally the secret to never feeling like you're at the mercy of somebody else's judgment
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He who is not angry when there is just cause for anger is immoral. Why? Because anger looks to the good of justice. And if you can live amid injustice without anger, you are immoral as well as unjust. - St. Thomas Aquinas
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How I incorporate a vintage lifestyle in a modern world 🎀
Another "tips and tricks" post ♡
Listening to the news/music on a radio: they might seem obsolete, but those portable old radios just bring me so much joy. There are so many good stations out there and it's a great tool to have screen-free background noise. I love turning it on during breakfast, when I am cleaning or baking, specially when classical music is playing.
A wooden brush: I am new to this, but I just bought my first wooden brush. They look so vintage and I am always open to try new things like this. I have long curly hair, so I hope this brush helps with detangling my hair.
Start a cookbook: right now I am slowly making a desert/cake cookbook and I am loving it so much. Fantasizing about it going from generation to generation just gives me more motivation to keep doing it.
Dressing modestly: This one is a non negotiable. It's also a religious choice. Dressing modestly will make you feel beautiful and there's a plus, almost all vintage fashion is modest. That's a win.
Red lipstick: It is such an eye turner, and sometimes it makes me feel a bit shy, but the confidence a red lip gives me is beyond imaginable.
Prayer: This is the secret to everything. Pray, pray, pray, pray. When you fall short, pray, when you are on top of the world, pray also.
Drinking Coke: Even though my country didn't sell Coke until 1977, this beverage just has that old feel, very "vintage americana". On warm summer days, Coke is the best thing ever.
Follow make up/ hair tutorials or 40s/50s routines: YouTube is full of these videos, some of them actual old tutorials from those decades.
Feel free to add more on the comments 🎀
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My tips for living an organized, feminine life.
If you are a coffee or tea drinker, make sure to invest in whitening toothpaste or white strips.
Floss, it defines your teeth and improves your smile.
Moisturize your skin. I never realized how much of a difference it made until I did it for the first time and someone close to me mentioned how much more awake and lively I looked that day.
If you aren't big on jewelry, at least wear earrings. They can be clip-ons or actual earrings, the point is that earrings elevate any look and make you look put together. A subtle but profound difference.
If you find that a full face of makeup is too time-consuming, invest in a brow gel, mascara and lash curler, concealer for under your eyes, and lipstick that can double as blush. These few things make a huge difference in looking put together.
If you struggle with lipstick because it doesn't go on smoothly or emphasizes the cracks in your lips, invest in a lip scrub or gently rub your lips with a washcloth or your finger after a shower to get rid of any dry skin and smooth them out.
If you're looking to change your wardrobe I suggest one piece dresses over a skirt and shirt combo. It's a small difference, but finding one throw over that goes with your dress as much easier than finding a throw over and a top that match.
Invest in a purse large enough to carry around everything that you have with you on a daily basis. It looks much more put together to have one satchel that holds all of your belongings, than to be struggling constantly to hold everything.
Keep a planner in your purse that is color coded by the following categories: work, personal, chores, and family. This allows you to make sure that you are allocating adequate time to each of these four pillars without neglecting the others.
Find a signature nail color, or two, and keep your nails neatly trimmed and polished. Freshen up your polish every few days.
Find your signature scent — this applies to deodorants, body mists, and perfumes. You don't need more than one of each, just find your favorite and stick to it. It removes the complication of having to choose later.
In a world of constantly chasing the next new thing — find the hygiene products that work for your hair and skin type and stick to them. This takes away from the constant need for something ne.
Create a skincare routine — even if it is just a face wash and moisturizer. Use this routine for your face, neck, and hands as these places are most prone to signs of aging.
There are so many things I probably forgot to list, but feel free to reblog with your own tips!
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Bdsm has no place in the traditional feminine community. We do not want you here. Our lives are not your fetish. Leave us alone.
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