so you think i’m BROKEN   ?   fix me.

I highly recommend you follow the person I reblogged this from.

i am shook

                      so you think i’m BROKEN   ?   fix me.

looks @ activity // cringes. hi im here for today maybe?

                      so you think i’m BROKEN   ?   fix me.

UNI-HIATUS : hello friends so as most of you know, i will be disappearing for quite sometime due to university. this is not permanent, and activity will be sparse but this is just a warning. semi-hiatus does not start until AUGUST 30TH, 2016. i will be most active on my own personal blog ( you can FIND ME ON MY PERSONAL HERE ) and will be posting study tips, aesthetic resources, memes, hamilton etc, etc. i hope to see you guys over there where you get to see the true meme lord.

UNI-HIATUS : hello friends so as most of you know, i will be disappearing for quite sometime due to university. this is not permanent, and activity will be sparse but this is just a warning. semi-hiatus does not start until AUGUST 30TH, 2016. i will be most active on my own personal blog ( you can FIND ME ON MY PERSONAL HERE ) and will be posting study tips, aesthetic resources, memes, hamilton etc, etc. i hope to see you guys over there where you get to see the true meme lord.

don’tcha just love that shitty graphic ,,,,,

b U T WO AH FAM !!!! LOOK WHERE WE’RE AT HONESTLY   ?   I HIT 400 FOLLOWERS THE OTHER DAY.   4 0 0 .   that’s the most i’ve had in a l o n g time.   but really guys,   thank you for sticking around on this blog for so long.   i’ve been in   &   out lately bc of my health   &   school   &   work shit,   but you’ve all been there steadfast   &   strong with me   &   this lame - ass pissbaby.   it means a lot.   SO WHAT’S NOT A BETTER WAY TO SHOW IT THAN A FOLLOW FOREVER.   (   maybe a giveaway.   but i’m saving that for the future ;~*   )

SPECIAL THANKS   :

@mctwisty   /   @deathwritten    /   @carvedsilk  :   abs.   the mer to my der.   the luv of my life.   another theatre goddess.   tbh when we first started interacting on ur elena i was like ‘ oh man this girl is g o o d there’s no way she can get better than this ‘   &   then u made ur mer   &   ? ? ?   you proved me wrong   ?   you are amazing at writing,   honestly.   &   every thread we have makes me want to cry UGH I LOVE U ABBY OK UR GREAT.   i could go on forever about u ily.

@mcruler   :   mia.   my luv.   my fam.   UGH I LOVE YOU   ?   you’re such a sweetheart honestly   &   your addison   ?   wow   ?   tbh   ?   and your writing is gorgeous.   you have an amazing way with words,   &   every time you pop up on my dash i just smile bc.   ily.   my addie.

@bcttleworn   :   SABRINA   !   YOU DESERVE A SPECIAL PLACE ON THIS LIST JUST FOR BEING A BIG SWEETHEART ILY.   you’re amazing at alex holy shIT   !!!!   he has the biggest place in my heart,   &   you bring his character to life.   i just.  I LOVE IT   &   YOU   &   WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT.

@lxstfights   :    okay sry ur actually izzie stevens IT’S RIDICULOUS.   ally,   your portrayal is so real.   you get izzie’s character down to a T,   &   you’re actually the sweetest person ever,   so   ?   also IRL derek shepherd.   i love it.

@agcntstarbuck   :   SUMMERRRRR hey babs ily.   i love your blog so much it’s CRAZY,   mainly bc ur the sweetest thing under the sun,   &   i love dana scully with all my heart so :’)   no but really you’re an amazing writer   &   so nice,   &   honestly we need to chill soon bc we live SO CLOSE WTF <3

@uptightnerd   :   okay layla you just made ur way back into the rp community but ur so special to me that i just had to have you on here   !!!HEY GUYS IF YOU LIKE BEN WYATT FROM PARKS & REC,   GIVE THIS BLOG A FOLLOW.   layla is one of the best writers on here tbh,   &   she’s also kind   &   hilarious   &   i love her to bits   &   pieces,   so    !!!   luh u xx

THE LOVELIEST PEOPLE HONESTLY   :

@starhaze,   @seriouslytorres,   @alleyspat,   @scalpelsuperstar,   @akepnermd,   @pxsthumus,   @amelia-hurricane-shepherd,   @neurohero,   @bbcmycroft,   @becomeshope,   @mcjorhunt,   @sloaniisms,   @healics,   @whichmorgan,   @harvalle,   @masondixons,   @gcldenthroat,   @mcplastics / @lockwoodspecial,   @cardiogcd,   @chosenforthis,   @airbcrneranger,   @brightotter,   @kaleiidoscopehearts,   @doctcrisms / @neurcisms / @littlcshepherd,   @fllowershop,   @glorysoaked,   @mcsteami,   @marriedcunt,   @chamberburied,   @criedhard,   @llexipedia,   @toerr,   @burnedthrice,   @crimesucks,   @oncecursed,   @gallowsqueen,   @laidre,   @nightnvrse,   @ovalbound,   @lotofblood,   @silverheartsilverskin,   @bonesettcr,   @falsepsych / @spookybeliefs.

AGAIN,   i love you all so much   &   thank you for sticking this blog out with me.   derek   &   i wouldn’t have made it this far without you guys.   <3

                The baby you have is the baby you were destined to have. It was meant to be. That’s what all the adoption people tell you, anyway. I’d like to think it’s true. But everything else in the world seems so completely random. What if, one little thing, I said, or did could have made it all fall apart? What if I’d chosen another life for myself, or another person? We might have never found each other. What if I’d been raised differently? What if my mother had never been sick? What if I’d actually had a good father? What if? What if?…What..if? Your life is a gift. Accept it. No matter how screwed up or painful it seems to be. Some things are going to work out as if they were destined to happen. As if they were just meant to be.    — MEREDITH GREY. 8.11.

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              she giggles as she feels his hands running up her sides.   hands grip either side of him,   pulling him towards her until her back’s against the sink.   ❛   i agree.   ❜   hands are released from his waist as they grip under the sides of her shirt,   pulling it over her head with such ease.   she pulls him closer to her,   a smirk filling her face.   she cocked an eyebrow as she brought her lips to his.   ❛   your shirt smells funny by the way.   ❜   she teased,   scrunching her nose.

             ❛   now that i’m out of it,   i suppose you can do WHATEVER you want.   ❜   her lips snaked along his jawline, peppering soft kisses as her teeth nipped the skin.   ❛   or   ---   you know,   we could just,   go to bed.   ❜   she sighs,   dramatically.

               he had slept over a few nights ago   &   apparently forgot a set of clothes,   for when he gets to her place after a long shift he sees HER   :   padding around her room in nothing but one of his shirts.   she slips into her bathroom,   barely giving him a glance as he can’t help but follow.  fingers a c h e for her skin,   yearn to travel the map of her body   ;   with such a long day behind him he knows she’ll help him forget all about it.

               ❛   you look good in my shirt.   ❜   it leaks from his lips,   dark   &   low in return.   one hand crawls past the fabric to rest at her waist,   the other pushing her hair aside for a kiss to place at the crook of her neck.   ❛   -   but you’d look even better out of it.   ❜

(   @mctwisty.   )

                       if she could sigh, she would’ve.   he knew,   dear god,   he knew.   eyes move around the car   ---   lips unable to part.   she tests her neck,   a small move to face him,   not broken.   her head turns more until their noses skim.   she could feel his presence,   but her vision was clouded.   eyelids flutter,   as a hoarse cough causes blood to slowly trickle out of her mouth.   her arm that wasn’t shattered,   found his hand,   squeezing with all the strength she had in her body.   ❛   d   ---   der  ---   ❜   a small grunt of frustration escaped exasperated lips as she cried out in pain.   her body merely surged, pressing back against the seat.   (   what’s wrong meredith,   you’re a doctor,  figure it out   ).   she assumed she’d lacerated a large part of her liver,   her leg possibly needed to be amputated.   she couldn’t think,   she could barely move.   then she remembered the life that was growing.

                         her hand that was wrapped around his,   carried both his hand   &   her hand to the stomach.   she wanted to talk, to tell him. but it all came out in grunts   &   cries.   ❛   baby.   ❜   (   there’s a baby inside of me,   he’s not moving.   )   the words escaped her lips before she screamed in pain her body seizing up,   hand involuntarily releasing his.   that’s when she felt it,   her seat belt beginning to give way.   before she knew it,   her body was against the other side of the car,   landing on bits   &   pieces of broken glass.   her body shook as she laid there,   small whimpers escaping her lips.   she couldn’t moved.   (   paralyzed probably,   if help doesn’t come soon,   it’ll be too late for me.   )  

                          blackness began to flood the corners of her eyes.   (   i’m going to die here,   we’re going to die here.   dammit derek.   )   ❛   i’m   ---   okay.   ❜   her breath was shaky as she laid there in a pool of her own blood.   eyes fluttered closed.    you’re no more than ordinary meredith.   her mothers voice rang through her head,   she liked being ordinary,   ordinary got her HIM.   she lets her eyes remain closed,   the scent of blood flooding her senses,   the pain that ached all throughout her body.   (   you’ll be okay derek,   you’ll be okay without me.   )   in a doctors opinion,   she knew there was a 1% chance she could ever come back from this   &   be OKAY.   breathing become less frequent but she was hanging on.   hanging on to that 1%,   that 1% so she could meet her child.   her breath wheezed loudly as she summoned all the strength in her body.   ❛   sorry   ---   for being   ---   late.   ❜

                    an examination rolls over in cranium,   scrolling through his endless hours of research   &   experience,   pulling whatever he can   ;   it races through his head like the speech of his coworkers.   (   female,   late 20s / early 30s,   victim of a broadside strike on the drivers side by an apparent drunk driver.   conscious,   barely,   pieces of the other car lodged in her lower thigh.   lacerations to her arm   &   collarbone.   unable to assess head wounds.   possible spinal injury.   treat with caution.   )   one thing surprises him   :   she’s talking.   SHE’S TRYING.   barely audible,   coughed   &   painted in b l o o d   –   the remnants of repetition,   something he said moments before   ;   why was she stuttering what sounded like his name   ?   why wasn’t panic the first thing on her mind   ?   pain,   help   :   HIS NAME SHOULDN’T BE HER SAVIOR.

                    &   then,   he realizes   :   of course.   how could he not recognize it   ?   the dusty locks falling past the shell of her ear,   the petite shoulder underneath his fingertips.   the car she took to work,   how she was late for their dinner date.   the ring   –   his mothers wedding ring   –   laced upon a chain around her neck,   the very CORE of him tethered to her being.   the truth hits him too slow but all at once,   pulling every ounce of air from his lungs.   ❛   meredith   ?   ❜   it shouldn’t be a question.   it shouldn’t be happening,   this couldn’t be happening.   he couldn’t be here,   barely touching the woman he loves,   watching her die.   it wasn’t real.   but it was.

                    ❛   meredith.   oh my god.    ❜   other hand holding him against the car nearly gives way,   stars dancing in front of his eyes as breath dares to trickle past his lips.   he covers his mouth with calloused knuckles,   unsure of what to say,   overcome by what he wants to do.   finally his grip falls on her once again,   shaking with his frame.   ❛   okay,   mer   ––––––   i need you t’ breathe.   okay   ?   i’m   –   i’m here.   alright   ?   i just   –––   i need you t’ breathe.   stay with me.   please.   stay with me.   ❜   he’s afraid he’ll break her.   just his fingertips lingering upon the collar of her shirt,   pressing faintly into skin   &   he’s afraid his touch alone will take her a w a y.   still he doesn’t pull away,   head ducking under the window to search for her face.   (   he’s glad she can’t see the tears streaming down his own.   )   ❛   listen,   someone’s on their way.   they’re gonna get you out of there.   can   –   can you move at all   ?   can you talk   ?   ❜

          heyo heyoo ! so listen up kids,   i recently just hit 450 followers so i decided to do a lil sumthin sumthin to show how much i appreciate you guys. anyways, i see that you’ve probably read the title. so I MADE A PSD PACK !. I am so forever greatful for all of you, and really hope you enjoy this pack because i worked kinda hard on it. feel free to add borders and adjust stuff but just i love you guys.   

——–   ( DOWNLOAD HERE   //   LIKE OR REBLOG IF USING ).

                  hands tremble,   as she hears HIS voice,   her HUSBANDS voice.   she can’t bring herself to turn so he could see who she was   ---    god it hurt all over.   her neck was most likely broken,   maybe a spinal fracture.   a piece of metal protruding from her leg.   vision was blurry but she had to say SOMETHING   ---   SO HE WOULD KNOW.   a cough,   blood trickling down rosy painted lips.   she didn’t know if her voice was audible but she could feel her heart about to burst.   ❛   d   ---   ❜   nothing.   head was still slung away from him,   the copper taste flooding her mouth.   maybe there was an hematoma sitting on the part of her brain that allowed her to speak,   or maybe her mouth was too full of blood.   ❛   d   ---   d  ---   ❜   a disgruntled moan escaped from her lips.    she was not fine, she was NOT going to be fine.

                     (   i can’t breathe derek,   it’s me,   meredith.   i’m not going to make it.   )

                    there was some kind of accident,   a cacophony of crushed metal   &   screams.   blood on the pavement   /   blood on skin,   a horror show unraveled before his eyes in mere seconds.   someone’s yelling behind him,   shrieking for a DOCTOR,   &   it takes him but a moment to register the sight at hand.   (   a surgeon should be used to tragedy,   to unrelenting surprise.   )   derek paces to the first car,   the worst in condition,   to find the confused,   panicked driver pinned to their seat by the steering wheel.   a sharp gasp pulls into heavy lungs,   hands daring to shake as he rests a palm gently on the shoulder of his patient.   ❛   hey,   hey   –   listen.   my name’s derek.   i’m a doctor at seattle grace mercy west.   ❜   he’s a doctor,   he’s a great doctor   ;   it’s as if saying it will validate their life in his hands,   will pull them from the wreckage around them.   it doesn’t.

                    ❛   you’re going t’ be fine.   alright   ?   just   .   .   .   just breathe.   everything’ll be okay.   ❜

                      so you think i’m BROKEN   ?   fix me.

                  ❛   GO AWAY   ---   i’m still mad at you,   and you’re not even my doctor. ❜

                   ❛   ––––––––   &   how’s my FAVORITE patient doing t o d a y   ?   ❜