lu-fu-nope - Tumblr blog

lu-fu-nope · 4 years

Text

This blew my damn mind

105K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 5 years

Text

Right now, I’m sifting through 50+ applications for a new entry-level position. Here’s some advice from the person who will actually be looking at your CV/resume and cover letter:

‘You must include a cover letter’ does not mean ‘write a single line about why you want this position’. If you can’t be bothered to write at least one actual paragraphs about why you want this job, I can’t be bothered to read your CV.

Don’t bother including a list of your interests if all you can think of is ‘socialising with friends’ and ‘listening to music’. Everyone likes those things. Unless you can explain why the stuff you do enriches you as a person and a candidate (e.g. playing an instrument or a sport shows dedication and discipline) then I honestly don’t care how you spend your time. I won’t be looking at your CV thinking ‘huh, they haven’t included their interests, they must have none’, I’m just looking for what you have included.

Even if you apply online, I can see the filename you used for your CV. Filenames that don’t include YOUR name are annoying. Filenames like ‘CV - media’ tell me that you’ve got several CVs you send off depending on the kind of job advertised and that you probably didn’t tailor it for this position. ‘[Full name] CV’ is best.

USE. A. PDF. All the meta information, including how long you worked on it, when you created it, times, etc, is right there in a Word doc. PDFs are far more professional looking and clean and mean that I can’t make any (unconscious or not) decisions about you based on information about the file.

I don’t care what the duties in your previous unrelated jobs were unless you can tell me why they’re useful to this job. If you worked in a shop, and you’re applying for an office job which involves talking to lots of people, don’t give me a list of stuff you did, write a sentence about how much you enjoyed working in a team to help everyone you interacted with and did your best to make them leave the shop with a smile. I want to know what makes you happy in a job, because I want you to be happy within the job I’m advertising.

Does the application pack say who you’ll be reporting to? Can you find their name on the company website? Address your application to them. It’s super easy and shows that you give enough of a shit to google something. 95% of people don’t do this.

Tell me who you are. Tell me what makes you want to get up in the morning and go to work and feel fulfilled. Tell me what you’re looking for, not just what you think I’m looking for.

I will skim your CV. If you have a bunch of bullet points, make every one of them count. Make the first one the best one. If it’s not interesting to you, it’s probably not interesting to me. I’m overworked and tired. Make my job easy.

“I work well in a team or individually” okay cool, you and everyone else. If the job means you’ll be part of a big team, talk about how much you love teamwork and how collaborating with people is the best way to solve problems. If the job requires lots of independence, talk about how you are great at taking direction and running with it, and how you have the confidence to follow your own ideas and seek out the insight of others when necessary. I am profoundly uninterested in cookie-cutter statements. I want to know how you actually work, not how a teacher once told you you should work.

For an entry-level role, tell me how you’re looking forward to growing and developing and learning as much as you can. I will hire genuine enthusiasm and drive over cherry-picked skills any day. You can teach someone to use Excel, but you can’t teach someone to give a shit. It makes a real difference.

This is my advice for small, independent orgs like charities, etc. We usually don’t go through agencies, and the person reading through the applications is usually the person who will manage you, so it helps if you can give them a real sense of who you are and how you’ll grab hold of that entry level position and give it all you’ve got. This stuff might not apply to big companies with actual HR departments - it’s up to you to figure out the culture and what they’re looking for and mirror it. Do they use buzzwords? Use the same buzzwords! Do they write in a friendly, informal way? Do the same! And remember, 95% of job hunting (beyond who you know and flat-out nepotism, ugh) is luck. If you keep getting rejected, it’s not because you suck. You might just need a different approach, or it might just take the right pair of eyes landing on your CV.

And if you get rejected, it’s worthwhile asking why. You’ve already been rejected, the worst has already happened, there’s really nothing bad that can come out of you asking them for some constructive feedback (politely, informally, “if it isn’t too much trouble”). Pretty much all of us have been hopeless jobseekers at one point or another. We know it’s shitty and hard and soul-crushing. Friendliness goes a long way. Even if it’s just one line like “your cover letter wasn’t inspiring" at least you know where to start.

And seriously, if you have any friends that do any kind of hiring or have any involvement with that side of things, ask them to look at your CV with a big red pen and brutal honesty. I do this all the time, and the most important thing I do is making it so their CV doesn’t read exactly like that of every other person who took the same ‘how-to-get-a-job’ class in school. If your CV has a paragraph that starts with something like ‘I am a highly motivated and punctual individual who–’ then oh my god I AM ALREADY ASLEEP.

200K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 5 years

Text

THERE IS A FONT THAT IS DESIGNED TO MAKE U REMEMBER EVERYTHING

I don’t usually share a whole lot but THIS IS INCREDIBLE

http://sansforgetica.rmit/?utm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=Sans_Forgetica&utm_content=Launch_Video

123K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 5 years

Text

“our teeth and ambitions are bared” is a zeugma

and it’s a zeugma where one of the words is literal and one is metaphorical which is the BEST KIND

357K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 6 years

Text

How To Get A Job Fast As Hell

@owenabbott

Apply to a job, wait (1) day, then call. Give them your first and last name. Tell them you submitted an application and that you’re very motivated to find [Enter field name] work. Let the conversation lead you wherever it takes. Be very polite. Say” thank you for your time, I’ll be looking forward to hearing back from you.” Rinse, repeat. This is to force them to be looking out for your application.

When you get to the interview, shake their hand firmly, tell them your first and last name.

Describe your experiences as “ two years transcription and data entry” if you have a desk job interview and “ [however many years] costumer service, retail and stock” for your retail jobs.

Don’t use job “ buzz words” I stg they hear them all day. Say things like, “ I’m detail oriented and am very good at taking instruction.” “ I would like to work for a company with integrity and I feel that [ company name] would be a good fit”

When they ask you if you have “reliable transportation” say YES. don’t tell them what kind of transportation, just say yes. (if you don’t do this, you wont get the job , I’m telling you right now).

Research the company. Know what they do, why they do it, how OLD the company is. WHERE it was founded, and what kind of position you’re intending to apply for.

When they ask you “ give us a situation where you had to blah blah blah” Make one the fuck up. Make yourself sound good as hell, and like you put your company’s needs slightly above the customer’s needs, but make the customer happy.

If they ask you about being outgoing, Say you “like to focus on your work so you can concentrate on doing things right” (which buys you out of having to act friendly all the time)

Questions for after the interview:

1. Does this position offer upward mobility?

2. Do you enjoy working for the company? (if you’re not interviewing for a temp agency who will send you anywhere)

Then, shake their hand, Ask them to repeat their name (REMEMBER THIS) say thank you for your time, wish them a nice day and leave. write their name down outside if you have to, just remember the fuck out of it.

AFTER your interview, send a card directed to the name of the person who interviewed you (I’ll give you them) that says “Thank you for the interview, I appreciate the opportunity. have a great day” This shows that you have an understanding of professionalism, and will have them thinking of you kindly (or at least remembering you) when they’re shuffling through the choices.

DO NOT tell them you just moved to the city over the phone. In person, tell them you just moved to the city. Make it sound like the only reason you need a job is because you moved. Not because you’re desperate.

__________

The titles of each section are key words you can use to search for jobs on Snagajob.com and Simplyhired.

Data Entry:

http://citystaffing.com/job/data-entry-specialistsmailroom-clerk/?utm_source=Indeed&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=Indeed

https://www.roberthalf.com/officeteam/job-search/chicago-il/data-entry-clerks-needed/43517752?codes=IND

http://www.simplyhired.com/job/data-entry-specialists-job/chicago-transit-authority/jepfivkhjk?cid=udsowkxtausyzitcfeecaeuzoxkltmbl

https://jobs-theprivatebank.icims.com/jobs/3435/temporary—data-entry/job?mode=job&iis=SimplyHired&iisn=SimplyHired&utm_source=simplyhired&utm_medium=jobclick&mobile=false&width=792&height=500&bga=true&needsRedirect=false&jan1offset=-360&jun1offset=-300

Front Desk:

http://localjobs.joblur.com/jobapplication2/?jobid=99957&subaffid=300006&JobType=Food%20/%20Bev%20/%20Hosp&ix=1&c1=99957

https://jobs.ajg.com/job/-/-/109/1256110?apstr=%26src%3DJB-10280

https://pepper.hiretouch.com/job-search/job-details?jobID=32066&job=receptionist

http://accesscommunityhealth.hodesiq.com/jobs/default.aspx?JobID=5203566 (this one is close to the place you rented.)

http://ihg.taleo.net/careersection/all/jobdetail.ftl?job=R113601&lang=en&media_id=24863&src=Indeed&src=JB-10920

https://covalentcareers.com/employer/listing/86450f8517588197c9b04f5068ed4300/detail/?apply=1&ref=indeed&v=30&utm_source=indeed&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=indeed_optical

http://www.careerbuilder.com/jobseeker/jobs/jobdetails.aspx?APath=2.21.0.0.0&job_did=JHN0KY6823WBWZX21VM&showNewJDP=yes&IPath=JRKV0F

http://www.simplyhired.com/job/front-desk-receptionist-customer-service-sales-job/rosin-optical-co-inc/qaeoquzgdi?cid=ivdnhijkmxchdanahwfoupazcwisfnxt

http://www.simplyhired.com/job/receptionist-front-desk-job/all-us-jobs/fonj7wmldf?cid=trhyvmfcsgjltxkjxkemyinsjveewfjp

Other jobs you don’t need a degree for that aren’t retail:

Dental hygenist ( yeah, seriously, who knew!) They also make about 40,000 a year)

Stenographer-Court Reporter

Surveyer ( you need a certificate for this, but its something you can get while working a temporary job and doing this on the side. Also, they make like $55,000 a year sooooooo) https://sjobs.brassring.com/TGWEbHost/jobdetails.aspx?jobId=1406428&PartnerId=16023&SiteId=5118&codes=IND

Real Estate Broker

Purchasing agents, except wholesale, retail, and farm products ( basically you arrange to buy large things) they make like 60K

Claims adjuster

Loan Officer

Subway driver (trains) they make like 60K,

Duct Cleaner: http://jobview.monster.com/Duct-Cleaners-950-00-Weekly-Entry-Level-Flexible-Hours-Call-to-Apply-Job-Chicago-IL-US-161970321.aspx?intcid=re

495K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 7 years

Text

So, guys, probably more reliable than Google Translate is in many cases there’s Linguee.

Linguee is a sort of dictionary filled with examples and sentences from all over the internet so you can look up individual phrases or words and see how they’re used and in what contexts.

So if you want to type in an actual phrase or something in English or Spanish (or a different language if you pick it) you can see your words used in sentences and see how actual sentences look… rather than relying on Google Translate to mess up the grammar or false cognates.

And more than that, you can also check the sources they take the example sentences from.

I highly recommend Linguee for people who are trying to figure out specific phrases rather than particular words (which I would use WordReference for).

76K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 7 years

Text

so i just googled the phrase “toeing out of his shoes” to make sure it was an actual thing

and the results were:

it’s all fanfiction

which reminds me that i’ve only ever seen the phrase “carding fingers through his hair” and people describing things like “he’s tall, all lean muscle and long fingers,” like that formula of “they’re ____, all ___ and ____” or whatever in fic

idk i just find it interesting that there are certain phrases that just sort of evolve in fandom and become prevalent in fic bc everyone reads each other’s works and then writes their own and certain phrases stick

i wish i knew more about linguistics so i could actually talk about it in an intelligent manner, but yeah i thought that was kinda cool

71K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 7 years

Photo

How to say pencil in French.

1K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Text

I honestly love being quiet and lowkey.

#SAME #except I want to tell everyone everything all the time #I'm a serial over sharer

42K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Photo

A very useful demonstration of the importance of sentence length.

103K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Text

Achieving your full academic potential: Things to Avoid Doing

Things you may want to avoid doing in the future.

Doing, wait, not doing these things always works for me.

Staying up late.

Sleep is yes. And as my speech coach puts it “there are only so many all nighters a person can pull before they just can’t”. Not only will staying up uber-late make the next day a battle between you an a surprisingly pillow-like desktop, if you’re tired, your work probably won’t be the your best.

Over-scheduling.

It’s easier to look at a schedule with 3-4 assignments than it is to look at one with 9-10. When scheduling, if you have a plethora of assignments, prioritize. Write down the most important assignments, and leave any others off the page or in the margins. You only have so many hours in the day and it’s better to complete the most important tasks than none at all.

Pro-tip: The Pareto Principle. The Pareto principle revolves around the 80%-20% ratio. Allow me to explain, if you have 10 pieces of work, there are probably only two of them that will take up 80% of the work. And 8 of them that will take up 20% of the work. The key to prioritizing is finding those two assignments (or however many = 20% in your workload) and doing them first

Working in bed or laying down.

NONONONONONONONONONO. This is how “cat-naps” happen. You swear that you’re going to get straight to work and then your phone on the bedside table lights up. It’s too hard to organize a book, a notebook, and a laptop on a bed without moving the laptop off of your lap. So why not check it?

Working in bed helps the boogeyman grow under it.

Over-working.

If you take on more than you can handle, you will not get the results you want. It’s perfectly alright to challenge yourself. In fact, it’s great. But, there is a difference between being ambitious and stressing yourself out. If it’s too much, go back to the Pareto principle and prioritize.

Drinking excessive amounts of coffee and energy drinks. (Especially in the afternoon.)

One (maybe two, if you ordered a tall) cups of coffee in the morning is fine. But in the afternoon or the evening, stick to exercise, healthy snacks, and naps. Sugary energy drinks as well as coffee that contain caffeine can speed up your heart rate, cause stress, and irregular breathing patterns. If you become addicted to caffeine these things will accelerate and can end up hurting you detrimentally.

Over-using productivity apps.

Productive apps are awesome, if used correctly, don’t abuse them. It was difficult for me to use productivity apps on my phone at first because the other things on my phone would distract me. If you plan to use productivity apps on you phone and computer make sure that you have the self-control needed o use them properly.

Tumblr. - I’m only half kidding

Those are the general ones, these are a bit more subject specific

Math/science

Falling behind.

In other classes falling behind is not recommended, but is usually fixable by reading a few chapters or asking a friend for notes. Because of arithmetic’s complex nature that relies not only on facts, but applying them it is very difficult to master one a concept while you’re supposed to be mastering another. Often, learning one key concept can help you with many other assignments, not learning key concepts can make those other assignments 10x harder.

Receiving low homework scores.

In all of the math classes I’ve been in, the homework scores were more of your grade than your test homework. Always turn in your homework, even if it feels impossible, try your best, and never leave your paper blank. Even if you got all of the answers wrong, many teachers will give you serious credit for trying and failing rather than just failing.

Learn everything from the teacher.

There are a plethora of online math resources that are awesome, and math teachers usually only teach one method of solving a problem. Try Khan Academy , For Dummies, or IXL. Or look around a bit, there are a lot of other great sites, those are just my favorites.

Learn everything. (This is usually for science.)

In science (especially in biology and Earth sciences.) you are introduced to a myriad of concepts and vocabulary words that might seem like too much to memorize. Don’t. Look at what your teacher puts emphasis on and memorize that. Also, if you are using a textbook, there is a good chance that the textbook is filled with notes on the ‘key concepts’ or learning requirements for each chapter. These are also things that you should attempt to memorize.

English/writing/history/ other humanities

Not develop an opinion. (Especially in history)

If there’s anything a english/ writing/ history teacher loves, it’s an opinionated student. Textbooks give you facts and figures, and you can interpret them however you want. So, do just that. This will show your teacher not only that you are interested in his or her subject, but that you are engaged in the material that they gave you.

Ignore teacher comments. (No matter how small.)

It isn’t fun to read nit-picky comments about your work. Especially on your writing. But look at them. Even if you receive a good grade on a paper, applying corrections on your next one will ensure that you get a better grade the next time.

Staying quiet in class.

I understand that for some people this one is hard, for some people this one is practically impossible. But teachers love it. If you can, voice your opinion and answer questions in class as frequently as possible. I’ve even received extra credit for being verbally engaged in class more than other students.

Not trying to learn everything.

This one is a lot like the ‘not ignoring teacher comments’. A lot of information slips through the cracks (especially in english) that pops back up on exams. Because most of what is learned in an english class is not drilled into you like it would be in a math or science class, to do well, you have to drill yourself. I’ve been told the difference between ‘affect’ and ‘effect’ plenty of times, but I didn’t truly learn it until this year when I had to study it for an exam.

Pro-tip: Don’t challenge your teachers. They determine your grades. Momentary satisfaction is not worth a bad grade.

Hope this was useful!

12K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Text

study moods

inspired by this post

because sometimes the idea of studying is too daunting to face, and mixing up your environment to make it more fun can make all the difference

too punk to quit: shorts and a band t-shirt, homework spread out over the floor, a can of soda or a shitty energy drink, and a playlist of your favorite throwback songs on full volume

sleepover: a nest of blankets and pillows, your comfiest pajamas, popcorn and gummy worms, everything you need within arms reach, not leaving this spot for hours (or days) until you’re done with all of your work

no distractions: sitting at a desk with nothing but a glass of water and a computer, hair pulled back, typing up notes from the school day

my life is a mess: hot tea, a comfy sweater, all of your papers sprawled out on the floor around you, finally going through and throwing out all of the stuff you don’t need anymore and hoping that you’ll be a bit less overwhelmed once you’re done (spoiler alert: you’re gonna feel so much better)

rise and shine: early morning, at a table or in the kitchen, drinking orange juice and getting a head start on some assignments

am i a scholar yet: at your favorite library, revising or taking notes on readings, classical music playing with headphones on and a bag of almonds to snack on

growing up is overrated: doing homework at a friend’s house, cartoons on the tv or your favorite playlist on shuffle, sharing gossip and solutions to math problems

15K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Text

“This is your daily, friendly reminder to use commas instead of periods during the dialogue of your story,” she said with a smile.

554K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Text

Writing Advice: Epithets - What Are They And How Should You Use Them?

One of my pet peeves as an editor is the irrelevant epithet. An epithet is many things, but in this context it is a descriptive word used in place of a noun or name, as an identifier. An example is below:

“I wanna be loved by you,” Marilyn sang. – noun

“I wanna be loved by you,” the blonde sang. – epithet

One of the common things I see people do is to use epithets in situations where they really aren’t relevant. I’ve also seen people say that you should NEVER use epithets, but I think that’s a little much. They can be used effectively to add more depth and meaning to a scene, but just like most things, can be really out of place if not used correctly.

If you’re using an epithet to describe a person, try to be sure that it is relevant to their position in the scene. One of the most common mistakes I’ve seen people make is to refer to someone by their profession in situations where their profession is completely irrelevant.

For example: They kissed, and the mechanic responded enthusiastically.

Now, unless this is a set-up where it’s important that we remember one character is a mechanic (is someone having an affair with a mechanic? Did they start up a porno in the middle of changing the oil in the car? Is one of the partners a trust fund kid who’s slumming it with a blue-collar worker and it’s important to reinforce that difference right now?), this is ridiculous. Why do we need to be reminded right at this moment that the character is a mechanic? If the answer is, “we don’t,” then don’t use that epithet.

A good rule of thumb is that if your narrator is familiar with the other character’s name, use that unless you are specifically reminding readers of one of the character’s traits. Think of it this way: When you first meet a stranger, you may identify them by obvious traits or by their role in the current situation. It’s not uncommon to identify the person bringing you your food at the restaurant as “the waiter” or “the waitress,” even though they may have introduced themselves by name at the beginning of the evening.

On the other hand, if you go to a restaurant where one of your friend works and they wait on you at the table, you’re probably going to mentally identify them as who they are, a full concept of what you know of their personality, summed up by their name.

This happens in fiction too. Once you’ve become familiar with a character, it’s kind of jarring to have them reduced to one single trait. You know who they are; you know their personality and maybe some of their motivations. You’re friends, in a sense. Using an epithet in this circumstance is distancing. It puts space between you and the character. It says “Forget everything you know about this character except the trait being emphasized right now.“

You can see why this should be used sparingly and not tossed in at random. I know a lot of people use it as shorthand to keep from getting pronouns confused, especially if you’re writing a scene with multiple people who use the same pronouns, but that’s like using a bomb to ward off a few mosquitoes. It’s overkill, and you start losing the effectiveness of the scene. It IS possible to write a lot of similarly pronouned people in the same scene without resorting to irrelevant epithets. (I’ve written a third-person POV m/m/m threesome, so I understand it can take a lot of work, but you’re a writer! You’re not scared of a little work!)

Anyway, keep that in mind when you’re writing: The words you use to describe people are important. They add things to the scene. And if you’re not careful, you might add things you didn’t mean to, and then you’ll end up with the equivalent of a banana on top of a pasta-marinara dish.

348 notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Text

also guys i think it’s time to start spelling ‘small’ right again,, it’s been long enough

#this is amazing #English language #language and change #language and technology

147K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Text

“This is your daily, friendly reminder to use commas instead of periods during the dialogue of your story,” she said with a smile.

554K notes · View notes

lu-fu-nope · 8 years

Note

Your child language acquisition and language change posts are my life savers currently

I’m really really glad that they’re useful to you even though I don’t need them anymore and I’ve stopped updating them. I’m so glad that these blog has been useful still!

Best of wishing with your studies!

2 notes · View notes