littl-vs
consistently traumatized acording to my therapist
so full of secrets
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i am getting overstimulated by my hair??
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if its any of us dont feel weird or bad
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catch me unable to eat because of the ptsd shit earlier
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yeah youre welcome
#like i said not a single person in this system doesnt like you#you need anything and well be there#and i can try to play a bit nicer if it helps#no promises because i *am* the embodiment of everything you're against at this point but i can try
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kid i know you dont hate me
#not enough people are wary of me anymore#i dont require you to like me or get along with you#im going to watch over you and keep an eye on will anyway#my *job* is to make people unnerved and leave us the fuck alone even though i dont have to do it very often#wasnt my intention to give that to you as well#my moral code is whatever the fuck works and you arent the only one who doesnt know what to do with that#my moral code wont ever do somethin thatll hurt will or you#im here either way until you tell me to fuck off from talking to you#call it a guardian angel or whatever the fuck you want you matter to will and im going to do my damn best to keep you safe
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i really missed you too
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watch how close i can come to breaking up with my girlfriend
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mmmhahah okay we can play that game
#🚬 fuckin *fine*#ill be pissed for a second maybe a few minutes and ill move on#but *maybe* people should learn to keep their fukin mouths shut about shit that doesnt concern them#*maybe* dont act all high an mighty about anything miss princess because i wont hesitate to lay you flat
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i really just is it that selfish to not want people t be handsy because im the ward of a playboy?
#not even th *son* i didnt even get adopted#everyone else did i just got placed under his care#and people were so *touchy*#it was fine when i was younger because itd just be a hand on the shoulder or on my face but its so much worse and i hate how *used* to it i#got and how *fine* it is#and is it reallt too much to ask to just talk to someone about it#for them to understand??#without triggering some sort of trauma response because i cant do that to older me not if he went through everything i did
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i hate the way jay looks at me because im not broken
#i wasnt “taken advantage of” or “assulted”#and i hate that i cant actually talk to anyone about anything#and i hate that i cant take showers unless they are hot enough to burn#and i really need to know if roy is still mad at me or if gar ever found out#and i *HATE* the way i gag whenever i smell cinnamon or pomegranate#its so dumb because *everything* i look at says these shouldnt have happened to me yet#that none of this shouldve happened until i was at least 18
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and now im home so i cant push off my "fuck everthing feels wrong" crisis like I have been for the last hour
#🐦 ik its all my fault like genuinely#i should have known#but idk im gonna go take a shower and not think about the rain#prrrrobbs gonna come back to this later who knowowwwsss
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i think that like maybe my fucked up timeline really messes with me
#🐦 like i have memories of things that arent supposed to hage happened to my yet or debatably*evr*#like how i slept with my girlfriend and she wasnt her and everyone blamed me for not knowing#and roy and wally and donna and kory were all so mad#and i remember having to make my way around the streets and trying to live and making some documents to get an apartment#and crashing on artys couch#but some of that shouldn't have happened#and b hitting me shouldnt have happened#idk im just kinda thinking a lot because the showers feel too much like rain and i cant also older me because it's..... hard stuff i cant do#that to him
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please?
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this isnt fair im *happy* why cant i have this one thing
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actually im so pleased i can reach past my toes after a little warm up
#🐦 cant quite stand with my hands flat on the ground but almost!#this is encouraging#and ive realized i might need to take up hazard on that lynn helping thing because my knees a little angry#at least i caught it before it got too pissed
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twenty minute stretch workout before work 💪
#actually not too bad what im working with#hamstrings are stiff so i was focusing on them and i had to put on that knew brace and adjust a little but overall?#not half bad#didnt get the chance to lift anything or work on building muscle but I didn't have time#wills brother has been working on what i need to as far as everything goes so i might pick up working out with him
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