POSTING THIS AGAIN!!!

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BE CAREFUL OUT THERE!!!

Any setting where the elves have weaker booze than the dwarves isn't committing to the bit

i can domesticate him

Because his original plan was to have him killed via letter of the law. His goal was always to get revenge within the confines of the law and publicly. He thought he could marry and be happy and have LY beheaded. But with no evidence since peng kun was killed and no witnesses like his aunt, he lost all hope. (Thus his breakdown in 47, he was that upset because he realized he lost his future.) He ultimately he choose revenge for the past over happiness in the future.

if you were gonna murder your fake dad and then immediately seek death, why'd you ask her to marry you in the first place?????

That is the point. What he is doing parallels what she did. There are so many parallels between the two, as they are mirrors of each other. Their trauma both informs who they are and how they do things. It will come up again and it will bite him (HARD) on the ass because he isn't telling her.

TBH I found the messiness beautiful because for them to have an epic love and a happy ever after they have to work through their issues and come to a place of mutual love, understanding, and trust. They have the "love" part right now but not "understanding" and not "trust". They are close to understanding, Niao Niao more so than Zisheng, but trust is the biggest one that will come between them.

he’s mad at her for getting revenge by herself, the empress keeps telling her a married couple is one person and they share everything; meanwhile he’s plotting revenge for his mother’s family while she’s totally in the dark. make it make sense!

Dumb musings about Buyi ahead, probably obvious to a lot of people, but something I just finally understood. Me doing some fandom meta'ing about our boy below:

What does someone do when they have a problem they can’t solve? Where they thought of everything, where they went through all possibilities? They usually ask someone else for help right? Two heads are always better than one. It’s typically common knowledge, intelligent people tend to ask peers for help when necessary. 

So the fact that Mr. Smarter Than Most didn't ask for help when he thought there was no way other than his way, really shows just how young he is. It shows just how narrow-thinking and inexperienced he actually was at the time. He is only 21 years old and spent probably a quarter of that in the military fighting. It's so easy to forget how young he is because he is so competent in what he does and usually acts mature for his age.

Now that I think about it there are other reminders of how young he is in the show. The man is extra af, right? He is flashy and showy when he does things, and he does it because he can. It's ridiculous, right? The way he does it also tends to be over the top too. Then there is his inexperience with social situations that aren't military-related/reporting to a higher authority. He has no idea how to woo a girl (didn't even consider the fact that others might be interested in her too until the Emperor reminded him), no idea how to talk casually, and no idea how to get people to like him. All signs of his age (and trauma), imo.

But I digress, my point was that he didn't talk to anyone when he needed help the most. He thought to tell Shaoshang but didn't want to implicate her (after the bite scene, he thought about how she told him time and again she would be by his side and help him so he knows she would be down for murder), and he probably didn't want to implicate anyone else. But he had other people he could have turned to but didn't. Which is why SS was so mad at him. He didn't think that someone else could come up with a different plan or perspective. He arrogantly thought all his ideas were the only ideas that could exist.

That is why in the very last episode Shaoshang told him that the fact he shared his burden was enough for her. It wasn't just his rejection of togetherness (of couples acting as one) or his abandoning her that made her break up with him, it was also his inability to seek help from others when it was most needed that really pissed her off. She had learned that lesson at this point, not just by Buyi's caning scene, but because of the Empress, A'yao, her brothers, and the rest. He didn't come to her for help! That was a big part of why she was so mad at him.

I think that was a big part of the show, or at least another side or theme they were going for. You are not alone, you don't have to go about the hard and difficult things in life by yourself. The many people of the world, all of them who shine brightly like the many stars in the sky, are full of love, ready to give it out should you seek it.

Our boy didn't and paid the price. :(

Cheng Shaoshang in episode one: Oh yeah, you should totally set fire to my traitor uncle. 

Ling Buyi who has been fantasizing about murdering his traitor uncle for ten years: 

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Btw you can be intensely critical of the Democratic party and recognize that it is full of aged out of touch moderates who are refusing to meet the urgency of the moment,

and also recognize that voting for Democrats is extremely important because it allows things like the confirmation of Justices and prevents the literal fascist party from gaining more power and that harm reduction is an important end in itself

These things can coexist

Politics is a long game. Being disappointed and angry today does not obviate your responsibility to participate

Yo I feel like the idea that the only historical women who counted are the ones who defied society and took on the traditionally male roles is… not actually that feminist. It IS important that women throughout history were warriors and strategists and politicians and businesswomen, but so many of us were “lowly” weavers and bakers and wives and mothers and I feel like dismissing THOSE roles dismisses so many of our mothers and grandmothers and great-grandmothers and the shit they did to support our civilization with so little thanks or recognition.

Pirates of the Caribbean/Skyrim Mashup by flipboit4midles.

(Bask in the awesomeness of this.)

Oh

My

God

A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is, or what scares me most. And I know they expect an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or people dressed like animals, but how do I tell them that when I was 17 I took a class called Relationships For Life and I learned that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. That their lover’s once endearing stubbornness has now become refusal to compromise and their one track mind is now immaturity and their bad habits that you once adored is now money down the drain. Their spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy, just another distraction in your busy life. Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought that I can become ugly to someone who once thought all the stars were in my eyes.

TIL that there are four stages to learning a new skill: unconscious incompetence, conscious incompetence, conscious competence, and unconscious competence.

via ift.tt

I never noticed but CSS goes into super feeding mode with LBY during their engagement because she 1) knows his eating habits, which are, to her, horrible, 2) knows what it feels like to starve. 

She wants him to eat more! She wants him to feel safe in regards to food security. She has her emotional support bread with her all the time, right? So that’s a comfort she wants to extend to him. I find this extra sweet and caring now. Maybe I’m late to the party in understanding this, but, it really warms my heart at how much she loves him at this point.