they used to make smackable technology. you used to be able to hit your tv when it didn't work good.

new favorite meme

The US military emitted 640 times as much CO2 as Taylor Swift last year

in my head the star wars equivalent of tswift is some human woman named tay’lor spiff or something and her stans are losing their minds over theories that she’s secretly a jedi singing about the horrors of war, even though she’s from a neutral system that hasn’t seen so much as a moral panic in 50 years

Source smoothdunk on twitter

IG : @emperorofmischief

someone with a major in literature and/or poetry tell me what's so poetic about this that it captivated me because i have no idea honestly

i love six o clock because the clock looks so stupid. "|" like get real

Lmao how is this real, "the ambient sounds of the world were wrong, sir"

I would like all Americans (and everyone else) who are excited for the Superbowl to know: Before the actual Superbowl there's a live tournament on TV, here in Germany, called "American Ice Football".

It is exactly what it sounds like: American Football but played on Ice, in shoes with entirely smooth soles.

It's a tournament with 4 teams and they are called Eastside Ossis, Westside Wessis, Northcoast Naughties and Southside Smoothies and it's just hilariously entertaining.

Here's a video to show you how stupid it looks:

unsung benefit i think a lot of ppl are sleeping on with using the public library is that i think its a great replacement for the dopamine hit some ppl get from online shopping. it kind of fills that niche of reserving something that you then get to anticipate the arrival of and enjoy when it arrives, but without like, the waste and the money.

Have you seen the crap they're putting on children's television nowadays? When I was a kid, TV shows made for us were meant to do one thing: sell toys. Now they're all about doing fun activities with your friends, and learning about your responsibilities to greater social harmony. No wonder capitalism is flaming out like a Boeing stock option.

Thing is, even with this renewed focus on teaching children not to be useless, cranky ultra-consumers, the shows don't exactly teach valuable skills. Yeah, yeah, I know, interpersonal discussion, knowing about recycling, outer space, Freudian psychoanalysis, how to make change. All that stuff is covered, and it's fine, but it seems like shows are expecting parents to fill in the gap with these skills. Skills the parents often don't have. The cycle needs to be fixed, and it's television's role, as always, to tell people what to do.

Kids should be learning about the different kinds of screwdrivers, basic wiring, how to replace floor moulding, and what sorts of chemicals might inadvertently create bombs. If there's time, they can cover less practical information, like how to drive an unsynchronized manual transmission in a Detroit Diesel. I'm not asking for too much: I think children do not necessarily need to know how to operate a Lenco unless they're planning on going drag racing, which is a sign of excellent parenting already.

That's why I've bought the rights to the entire back catalogue of The New Yankee Workshop, and recruited a pop starlet to sing a new earworm of a theme song. We're gonna chop up the existing episodes with lots of fast transitions, exploding effects, and a dance party at the end. Wouldn't you rather your toddler ask you for a scroll saw for Christmas?

Girlfriend who hates you simulator