May the 10 of Pentacles bless your account with more money than you can spend. 💵✨

I hate that the Dairy Queen cashiers have to flip your blizzard upside down before giving it to you. I hate it. I know it’s most likely going to stay in it’s cup and I know I get a free one if it doesn’t, but the cocktail of a potential disaster and the cashier apologizing to what is most definitely a horrified me, having to sit in a drive-thru while someone behind me just bore witness to my fucking salted caramel blondie blizzard splattering on the asphalt, melting away while they mix me another one and i pray to god that they don’t flip it upside down again, is just a stress that I find entirely unnecessary. I trust it’s thick, just give me your word and i’ll be on my merry way.

I’ve never seen more relatable content in my life omg

ABBA goes so hard in so many different ways like they really have a song for every situation.. breaking up? getting married? defeating the french? Finding out you have not one but three possible fathers??? Really they covered everything

date a boy who makes you feel the way music does

i got a rare condition

i got a glass dick and paper balls

every time i jump my dick just shatters and my nuts turn into origami paper cranes and fly away

op is literally choking on their alibis but its just the price i pay i guess

and yes but what a shame what a shame the poor groom’s bride is a 

Andrew Lloyd Webber…Writes entire musicals to showcase one (1) iconic diva song

Frank Wildhorn…Writes entire musicals that just happen to, by happy accident, have 2-3 jams

Robert Lopez…Writes entire musicals because he loves $$$

Jason Robert Brown…Writes entire musicals because he loves himself

Stephen Sondheim…Writes entire musicals to help decadent gay teenagers from the Upper West Side of NY and Midwest of the U.S ace their SAT verbal section

Andrew Lloyd Webber…Writes entire musicals to showcase one (1) iconic diva song

Frank Wildhorn…Writes entire musicals that just happen to, by happy accident, have 2-3 jams

Robert Lopez…Writes entire musicals because he loves $$$

Jason Robert Brown…Writes entire musicals because he loves himself

Stephen Sondheim…Writes entire musicals to help decadent gay teenagers from the Upper West Side of NY and Midwest of the U.S ace their SAT verbal section

I don’t know why but Will Roland’s fucking Instagram is hilarious to me. Hes got two posts, almost 45k followers who I can only assume are just wishing for more posts, and he follows one person. That person is Barack Obama.

i honestly always forget that my posts show up on peoples dashes most of the time. like, i’m just shit posting, get with the program.

Howard Foster and Myra Clark, high school sweethearts forced to break up in the 60s due to racist social pressure. They reunited 40 years later and got married.

Me trying to connect seretonin molecules to my neurotransmitters

someone: stop quoting John Mulaney all the time

me: