me: sees my fp talking
me: !!!!!notice me validate me love me pl eas e i love you i love you!!!!!
fp: logs off
me: well now that we established that you hate me, my death is now set fo-
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this lead to a lot of me clinging onto him and waking up crying in the middle of the night. yikes
karamatsu tried to kill himself once. it was so traumatizing that i had nightmares about it all the time and i asked todomatsu if we could switch spots so i could sleep next to karamatsu
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i loved him so much. he was so ridiculous but i just wanted him to be happy. he didnt deserve the pain others inflicted on him or the pain he inflicted on himself
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karam/atsu tried to kill himself once. it was so traumatizing that i had nightmares about it all the time and i asked todom/atsu if we could switch spots so i could sleep next to karam/atsu
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ggod im so obsessive its disgusting
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i hhate star wars i have 0 interest in it!!!! all it does is remind me of my qp!!!! who ignores me for it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! amd who stays up until like 4am ignoring me!!!!
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Me: I am content
Me: *remembers argument that never properly ended/ all the things that bother me that I’ve never said bc I’m terrified of being abandoned*
Me: I am no longer content
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im so annoying??? tbh??? i only talk abt myself and thats why?? ppl dont talk to me???
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i want to starve myself out of spite lol but
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king: my desperate need for destruction aislyn: my desperate need to be loved ev: my desperate need to be cared for
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the x files // s2 e3
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um im th real osomatsu,? fuck you???
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i shouldve t ried harder bc now theyre Gone
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I want to fight.
I want to tear open my ribcage and release the snapping, snarling beast from inside of me. I want to scream and kick and hurt.
So long now I’ve been silent and nodding and tame. I’ve been your plaything- a raggedy damn doll. But now I have teeth. I’ve got bones and claws and fists. I’ve got anger in my heart and fear in my eyes. I’m a nightmare at my core and the terror’s dripping out. My heart is kicking out.
I want to fight.
“I Want to Fight” by Specter B. Bradford (via forever-driveling)
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barghest i guess?
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