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cannibalism is fun + sexy + it doesnt hurt anyone!
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is it obvious that I'm dying for any new Barb content? I can't stay alive anymore i need barb i need barb art i need barb fic i need barb irl hello ???
origina screenshot
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cant stop thinking abt @illumiskneecaps tags on this tweet
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MC who was sad that they didn't get to see the Solar Eclipse so Beel and Belphie decided to recreate it for them.
-MC, wearing sunglasses and sitting outside the HOL-
Lucifer: MC! What in the nine circles are you doing out here?
MC: I'm watching the eclipse.
Lucifer: We don't even have a sun in the devildom
MC: Shhh! It's starting!
Beel, Wearing a cardboard cut out of the sun: *Standing still*
Belphie: *Wearing a cardboard cut out of the moon, passes by Beel*
MC: Hell yeah
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Have you seen those videos of the people using buttons to teacher their dogs how to talk? (If not look up Bunny the dog on TikTok)
Can I request a reader who’s been teaching Cerberus how to talk with those buttons and the brothers reactions to it? Or at least Lucifer and Diavolo’s reactions since they are basically dog dads
SO, fun fact, I actually taught my dog some of those buttons as well. Unsurprisingly, the only one that she knows well and uses is “hungry” so I’ll feed her. She’s got a one track mind. Anyway, yes, this is a year later and you may not even care about this anymore but I’ve had it sitting in my drafts for ages and I’m finally back on this blog after some serious health issues and falling out of the fandom for a while. Now onto the actual request!
Lucifer is unimpressed when you first tell him about teaching Cerberus the buttons. He doesn’t see the point - Cerberus has a job and it requires very little communication on his part, other than attacking intruders and defending the hamily. However, Lucifer has to admit that the buttons do have their uses because now he always knows what Cerberus wants and he actually orders you to teach Cerberus more buttons that he thinks would be useful - something for if Cerberus is not feeling well or if there’s a warning that he wants to pass along, or even buttons to praise Lucifer for being such a good owner. However, Cerberus seems to much prefer the buttons you’ve trained him on, like “park” and “fetch” and “hug”, compared to the buttons Lucifer commissioned. It doesn’t exactly bolster Lucifer’s tough reputation when he introduces Cerberus to someone as a scare tactic and the large dog is repeatedly hitting “nap” or “belly rub”. Lucifer has taken to hiding those buttons to avoid any more embarrassing situations (though he absolutely provides those belly rubs in secret after).
Though he pretends not to be mostly ambivalent to the button situation, he is incredibly touched when he realizes that you’ve created a “Dad” button as well and Cerberus happily smacks the button whenever Lucifer walks into the room. It’s beyond endearing and, while he’d never admit to it, he definitely feels his connection with Cerberus is even stronger now. With that in mind, Lucifer takes everything he’s learned from watching you train Cerberus to teach him the “love you” button in relation to you. Seeing your face light up the first time Cerberus hits that button upon you walking into the room makes this entire endeavor completely worth it.
Diavolo is so incredibly pleased by this development, both because it shows just how smart Cerberus is - he’s learned so many different buttons - and by how clever you are for teaching Cerberus such a skill. Diavolo is someone who definitely loves those kinds of videos on TikTok and he finds great joy in finding the more obscure kind of buttons, including things like “please” and “no”. The first time he sees Cerberus use the “bitch” button (that Satan and Belphie created) on Lucifer he nearly cracks a rib with laugher (Lucifer would love to do more than just crack his rib for teaching Cerberus that button). It’s also not unusual for Cerberus to hit the “dad” button when Diavolo comes to visit which irks Lucifer more than a little so of course you have to teach Cerberus “mom” so he can hit that when Diavolo is around instead. However, Cerberus seems to have his own opinions on this because he still hits “dad” for Diavolo and hits “mom” when Lucifer is around instead. As you can imagine, only one of those demons is happy with this new development.
As a special mention, Satan, Belphie, and Mammon absolutely love that you’ve taught Cerberus buttons. They make it their goal to create as many annoying and rude buttons as possible, including but not limited to swear words, why, and go away. They spend hours trying to convince Cerberus to use the rude buttons in relation to Lucifer to no avail. It’s a bit of loss but at least Cerberus has taken to some of the other buttons that they know will annoy Lucifer so it’s worth the punishment they get when Lucifer discovers this little trick of theirs after he brings a dignitary to meet Cerberus and the dog hits a button the loudly yells "fuck off". (They never learn that their lessons actually worked and Lucifer now has to deal with a very judgmental Cerberus who fights with him in private via button, much to Lucifer’s disbelief.)
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i feel bad for bigender people, the commute between Jupiter and college has got to be rough
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Idia: H-Hi... M-My name is I-Idia Shroud. The housewarden of Ignihyde...
Yuurin: *bows her head respectfully to him* It's my pleasure to meet you, Housewarden Idia. My name is Yuurin. *has been assigned by Professor Vargas to help him in finishing the exercise*
Idia: O-Okay. Shall we start now?
Yuurin: *nods*
Idia: *lies down on his back, bending his knees*
Yuurin: *holds his feet securely*
Idia: I'm quite good at situps. I can probably do five.
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: *smiles* That's great, Housewarden Idia.
Idia: OMG!
Idia: R-Really?
Yuurin: *nods* We should start now, Housewarden Idia.
Idia: Ah, yes. *tries to do one situp*
Yuurin: ...
Idia: *struggles to lift his upperbody*
Yuurin: ...
Idia: ...
Idia: *sighs to himself*
Yuurin: It seems you didn't get enough sleep last night.
Idia: Yes...
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: He's the opposite of Leona-senpai.
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: Please hold my hand, Housewarden Idia. So I can pull you up.
Idia: Eh? You will do that?
Yuurin: Yes. Your core will still hurt after this even with assistance.
Yuurin: That should be acceptable.
Idia: Th-Thanks...
Ortho: What do you think about her, brother?
Idia: She's nice.
Ortho: That's great! Then can you be friends with her?
Idia: Nonononono— I shouldn't.
Ortho: Why not?!
Idia: Leona will kill me.
Ortho: ...Oh.
Idia: I witnessed how he dragged Ace when he tried to approach her.
Idia: It was the scariest thing...
Ortho: ...
*In the Equestrian Club*
Sebek: *frowning*
Sebek: What is a non-member doing here?!
Student A: Oh. Yuurin is here to visit that horse.
Sebek: That still doesn't answer my question!
Sebek: Our horses are not pets!
Student A: Well, you should ask Sir Riddle.
Sebek: No need! I will ask him myself! *approaches Yuurin*
Sebek: HUMAN! ONLY MEMBERS OF EQUESTRIAN CLUB ARE ALLOWED TO BE HERE!
Yuurin: I have permission from Riddle Rosehearts — Housewarden of Heartslabyul.
Sebek: Do you have proof?!
Yuurin: ...
Her horse: *his tail swishing* *and obviously annoyed at Sebek*
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: Are you the leader of this club?
Sebek: No!
Yuurin: Then, are you its vice leader?
Sebek: N-No...
Yuurin: I see. So you hold no authority.
Sebek: How dare you, human!
Yuurin's horse: *grunting noises*
Yuurin: Calm down, Aerion. *pets him gently*
Aerion: *snorts*
Sebek: You... YOU EVEN NAMED THE HORSE?!
Aerion: ...
Aerion: *is now staring at Sebek*
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: Yes. Aerion is a majestic horse. He reminds me of Pegasus.
Aerion: *nuzzles her hand*
Sebek: ...
Sebek: YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO NAME OUR HORSES!
Aerion: *baring his teeth at him*
Yuurin: ...
Riddle: Yuurin has my permission to visit the Equestrian Club.
Sebek: !!!
Sebek: I-Is that so?
Yuurin: ...
Riddle: You should apologize to him.
Sebek: Wh-Why would I—
Yuurin: "One's character is a reflection of their leader."
Yuurin: Is the housewarden of Diasomnia the same?
Riddle and Sebek: ...
Sebek: ARE YOU INSULTING MALLEUS?!!
Yuurin: You're tarnishing your housewarden's reputation with that behavior.
Riddle: ...
Sebek: You... FIGHT ME, HUMAN!
Riddle: Sebek!
Yuurin: Very well.
Yuurin: *walks up to him and punches him straight in the face*
Sebek: *falls on his behind*
Sebek: *blinks in confusion*
Sebek: What—
Yuurin: I advise you to visit the infirmary. And have your nose treated.
Sebek: *his nose bleeding from the punch*
Riddle: ...
Yuurin: *turns to Riddle* I hope you forgive me for my behavior. I will accept any disciplinary action.
Riddle: ...
Riddle: No. It's fine. He asked you for a fight and you gave it to him.
Sebek: ...
Sebek: HE CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD!
Lilia: *chuckles* No, Sebek. You asked for it and he acted based on your request.
Sebek: Keuk— I see. Thank you, Lilia-sama, for explaining to me.
Lilia: What is his name again? Yuurin? *chuckles* He's quite strong for him to take you down easily.
Sebek: *blushes in embarrassment*
Malleus: Indeed. Why not invite him to visit Diasomnia? I would like to meet him myself.
Sebek: W-Waka-sama?
Lilia: *chuckles* Don't worry, Sebek. We are only curious.
Akihiko: Yuurin...
Yuurin: I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry.
Akihiko: ...
Akihiko: *chuckles* Well, we can't do anything about it now.
Yuurin: ...
Akihiko: Anyway, Yuurin? Are you still taking your medication?
Yuurin: Yes. On a daily basis.
Akihiko: Don't you think it's time that you stop taking them?
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: But Aki—
Akihiko: Yuurin, I want to hear your real voice someday.
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: Hm. I'll find an alternative instead to keep this manly voice.
Akihiko: As long as it's not medication.
Yuurin: Yes, Aki.
Akihiko: Thank you, bluebell. *chuckles softly*
Yuurin: *smiles*
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you can literally say anything to men, it doesn’t matter
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Am I going clinically insane for real this time or did they actually refer to Lucifer as "daddy" in his newest Wanderers' Whereabouts thingy
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Beel, in a cheery tone: MC is so cute, I could eat them up.
Beel, in a serious tone: ...I could.
The brothers: *stops what they were doing and stares at Beel*
Beel: I won't though.
The brothers: *nods and goes back to doing whatever they were doing*
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PLEASE WHATS WITH HIS FACE 😭😭😭
WHY HE'S LOOKING LIKE THIS (still wanna kiss him tho)
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