Karts thought of the night.

I ran in to a wall today. I have a slight touch of  finding something things that that i should never find. But running in to this open my eyes to what could be truth and what could be lie. My thoughts they seem to fight each other a lot when it comes to my heart and what is logic. I keep myself distant away from what could cause me a pain. It would not be the first i happen to find my self finding a lie that was told to me. I only want to love the things and people around me but lies cut like knifes and i find my self letting it bleed not wanting to face what could be truth. I don't want to think someone close to me could do a thing like hurt me with lies, but i face the truth with hard facts and reasoning. But i would at the same time just run with the lie and fake it untiil i make it and use the lie to build me up like they had did for themselves. Its mean and cold. but i only want to think with reason. My heart has no play in the world of a liers.

Karts thoughts of the night.

Sometimes things never seem to go your way. At least for me there never was once where thing would go exactly as planned. I found myself running around trying to figure out what went wrong. It like a cycle of mess and negative thoughts. I punish my self knowing I made the mistake and I never get a another chance or if I do I would only make it worse. .

For a long time I face a wall that was called self hate. Wanting to get better but putting my self down because I failed first time. Years I thought I wasn't good for anyone of anything. And I stayed in the shadows of the maze that was my mind and faced the every day challenge of getting up everyday to feel like I was only to fail at.life anyways.

Thing changes as I got older.

Growing wiser but scared. 21 years under my belt. I learn how to face thing differently and teach my self I can be good at something and I can be happy with my self. I don't think I'm any better then anyone. I can't ever think of myself of a higher statues then another. It hearts my heart when people think I do. I'm only here to try to live be as happy as I can without hurting and or hate the things and people around me. Lost but found ill keep that in my hear as I grow. Maybe being able to explain fully what in my heart and what I look forward to in the further

K.arts thoughts of the day.

Faced with the challenges of life i found my self locking my self down and showing no fear

To what comes blocking my path to a goal I dream of everyday. Showing my passion for the art of character development. To show people my love for the skill but not only that but what learn working with the many colors I have seen with my eyes and those the colors the left it's print in my inspiration I put on my work. Testing my kin eye to seek out only the colors that could move the world. And the people you me happily. Because I care for them all. And they aspire me to love forward and get out in the crazy world of judgment and love.Hi I'm karts.

Kart thought of the day. Every time i look at my self i never once gave my self prep talks or say i was looking good. I would stare my self down and swear i can do better. I can be better. I can hurt less. But yet to find a good thing about what i see. I look at my hands and always say i can do more with these.

Being a home full time just about. Being a in home care provider for my step father i learn i can not ask say talk about it. But do it and grow. The smile he gets when he sees my drawing has pushed me to give my all to my art. Even if it hurts me. I will rise to any hill or trap this life has for me in the art world. And i hope i found were i can say those things but it be a good thing because the one thin that should never change is my skills as a artist and my determination to move people . everyday i wake up and look in the mirrow. Hopfuly if i want change it not because im not confident but because i want to become a master. A queen of her arts.

Being different is a art in its self. Because able to do it in style take no afford at all. Atlease if you love who you are no matter the hate. Take you image of yourself and make it yours. No one elses .-k.arts thoughts of the day