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karinakan · 1 month

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Three Big Girl Investments I’m Asking Him For

The girls in the femininity/hypergamous courses wouldn’t tell you what I would for FREE! Take notes and like ❤️ to save for later.

Disclaimer: I am not asking for anything I am not financially prepared to invest in myself if I am told “no”. These are all “Hoe” appropriate asks for the man I don’t want to marry but he’s cool for this chapter. These are all advanced asks and not suggested for anyone to use as reference if you are not educated nor prepared to do so.

A Gas Station/EV Charging Station

We are transitioning into tech based times and major car companies are producing electric vehicles which indeed need charging. Road trips for work, relocation or vacation isn’t going anywhere anytime soon.

I bet you wish you owned a gas station when the prices went up earlier this year. Gas prices in the 90’s were like $1 and NOW WE ARE AT SIX DOLLARS A FUCKING GALLON!

MY IDEA: A location right off a highway and preferably not surrounded by a chain of gas stations. I also want to be accessible for truckers whether it’s day or nighttime.

Male Dominated Business

A cigar lounge. A barbershop. A sports bar. One of the wisest things I’ve been advised as a woman is to invest in a male dominated business. Men who grow their hair need shape-ups, so I cannot wait to begin construction on a barbershop. Men are die hard loyal to their favorite pubs and sports bars (especially if their team is in the playoffs) so I want to profit off of that and have no shame.

Most strip clubs, bikini bars and burlesque clubs are owned by men. I want to flip the script for my personal satisfaction (and profit).

MY IDEA: I prefer to get my feet wet with a barbershop in order to gain hands on insight on the male consumer since the barbershop is where men vent and bond. I would secure a location in a neighborhood where I can secure enough black barbers both male and female.

A Franchise

At first I wasn’t interested in owning any franchise, however when I did further research I figured out how I plan on maximizing my investment. People are more willing to purchase something when they’re waiting for their flight/bus/train so I’m going to go that route.

MY IDEA: Maybe a Dunkin/Subway in a bus/train station. Amtrak isn’t going anywhere until we can teleport so I want to capitalize off of folks who want a coffee while waiting for their delayed train. I know someone pocketed big bucks off of me!!!

Egg Freezing (bonus)

This one is suggested for anyone who intends to become a mother. This costs around 10,000-20K according to this source with an average storage fee of $800 a year. I’m thinking long term and I want to pass on investments to my children. Even if you insist on not being a parent, you may want to save them just in case on someone else’s dime. Nothing against those who do not desire children because I commend anyone responsible enough to opt out of a responsibility they know they do not want. That’s smart.

Hope this inspired you in the slightest! Happy healing 🕯🧿

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karinakan · 1 month

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Question about Cycle Syncing. Do you know where i can find, like a masterlist of food that fits into the steps of the cycle? I always see the same food but how abt the rest? Would be nice to know for example for meal building.

MASTERLIST: NUTRITION CYCLE SYNCING

This post is a masterlist of everything that is recommended you eat while cycle syncing. if you don’t know what that is, read this beginner guide.

This post is a researched post, because I actually couldn’t find a proper masterlist. So, I researched what kinds of nutrients you need during your 4 phases, but I am NO DOCTOR. Just a little disclaimer!

MENSTRUAL/FOLLICULAR PHASE - high iron, vitamin C foods

VEGETABLES

Spinach

Silver beet

Broccoli

String beans

Peas

Sweet potatoes

Beet greens

Dandelion greens

Collards

Chard

Chilli peppers

Sweet yellow peppers

Parsley

Brussel sprouts

FRUITS

Oranges

Guavas

Black currants

Cantaloupe

Kiwis

Lemons

Lychees

Papayas

Strawberries

Oranges

Watermelon

Figs

Prunes

PROTEINS

Beef

Lamb

Liverwurst

Pork

Veal

Dried beef

Eggs

Shrimp

Clams

Tuna

Sardines

CARBS/OTHER

Whole wheat bread

Enriched pasta

Rye bread

Enriched rice

Tofu

Beans

Lentils

OVULATORY PHASE – complex carbs, lean proteins, anti-inflammatory, vitamin B6, folate/choline

VEGETABLES

Carrots

Spinach

Sweet potato

Red potato

Green peas

Chickpeas

Butternut squash

Asparagus

Turnip greens

Romaine lettuce

Beets

Sweet corn

Mushrooms

Pumpkin

Parsnip

Cauliflower

FRUITS

Bananas

Avocado

Mango

Blueberries

Apple

Peaches

Tangerine

Pink grapefruit

lemons

PROTEINS

Egg whites

Strained yoghurt

Skinless white meat poultry

Plain greek yoghurt

Low fat cottage cheese

Tofu

Lean beef

Powdered peanut butter

Beef liver

Pork loin

Bison

Organ meat

CARBS/OTHER

Lentils

Kidney beans

Green peas

Walnuts

Flaxseeds

Cashews

Almonds

Pistachios

LUTEAL PHASE – High fibre, vitamin B12, magnesium

VEGETABLES

Spinach

Swiss chard

Collard greens

Green peas

Sweet corn

Cabbage

Arugula

Bok choy

Celery

Lettuce

FRUITS

Pears

Strawberries

Avocado

Apples

Raspberries

Blackberries

Blueberries

Bananas

PROTEINS

Animal liver

Animal kidney

Clams

Swiss cheese

Turkey

Crabs

Ham

CARBS/OTHER

Oats

Popcorn

Almonds

Fresh coconut

Sunflower seeds

Dark chocolate

Wheat

barley

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karinakan · 1 month

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YOUR BEGINNER GUIDE TO CYCLE SYNCING — DIVINE FEMININE

based on a health link article

Cycle syncing is when we match our menstrual cycle to our health lifestyle, such as nutrition and exercise. By using your menstrual cycle as a guide of your health throughout, you become in tune of your hormonal needs

Our menstrual cycle has 3 distinct phases excluding your period, which occur over a month.

Follicular(menstruation happens in this phase). Lasts for 6-14 days. Estrogen and progesterone are increasing.

Ovulatory. Lasts for 15-17 days. Estrogen is at its peak, testosterone and progesterone are increasing.

Luteal. Lasts for 18-28 days. Estrogen and progesterone are high, but if the egg stays unfertilised, the hormones decrease and the cycle repeats.

EXERCISE

Menstrual/Follicular

Your hormones are at its lowest, so light exercise and cardio is better suited for your stamina here. Yoga, walking, stretching, jogging

Ovulation

Hormones are increasing, so high intensity exercises are suited for this phase as your energy is higher. gym, cycling, skip rope, running, HIIT

Luteal

As your body prepares itself for another cycle, energy may be low, so light or moderate exercise is best. Pilates, ab exercises, any strength training

NUTRITION

Menstrual/follicular

Your Estrogen will begin to increase in this stage. Drink warm beverages to help with cramps. Despite your cravings, limit fatty/oily foods, caffeine and watch your sodium intake. Eat foods that help with metabolising your estrogen.

broccoli, sauerkraut, cabbage, high quality meats, cauliflower, spinach, sesame seeds, flaxseeds

Ovulation

Your estrogen is the highest so opt for foods that support your liver, protect you from environmental toxins(as they can impact your hormones) and are anti-inflammatory.

Leafy greens, whole grains, eggs, legumes, high quality meat & fish, garlic, almonds, whole fruits

Luteal

Estrogen and progesterone are high, but will begin to decrease. Magnesium rich foods to help fight fatigue, and foods that help with serotonin are best.

Leafy greens, quinoa, buckwheat, dark chocolate, spinach, pumpkin seeds, sweet potatoes, beans, avocado

This is the phase when your cycle is beginning to repeat, so you want to ensure that your diet is optimal. Avoid caffeinated drinks, sugar, deep fried foods and high amounts of dairy.

To start implementing these changes to your lifestyle, track your cycle and begin to identify how long each phase lasts for. Pay attention to how your body responds to each phase.

with that, I wish you luck 💖🎀 i hope we all stay healthy and happy together 👏

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karinakan · 1 month

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wanted to post this on it's own because i spent so much time on it...

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karinakan · 1 month

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Best foods for beauty:

•Celery juice (contains anti-inflammatory properties)

•Hot water and turmeric with lemon (anti-inflammatory properties & vitamin c promoting glowing and youthful skin)

•Salmon (prevents inflammation that leads to acne)

•Sweet potatoes (contain retinol vitamin A)

•Macadamia nuts (prevent insulin driven acne)

•Green tea (antioxidants and anti-inflammatory properties)

•Oranges (vitamin c helps prevent wrinkles and aging skin)

•Bone broth (collagen booster)

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karinakan · 2 months

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Hi! I’m about to start uni in October (law)

Can you give me a list of to-dos to mentally and physically prepare for this new journey? Like, things to bring, items to buy, notebooks etc 🥹💘

Operation Straight-A Student: A Comprehensive Guide to Prepping for a Successful Uni Experience 🎀📚💗✏️

ty for the ask! i'm not a law student, so this is gonna be more general uni advice that i hope can apply for you. best of luck in your journey, you're gonna do amazing things!!

step no. 1: plan, plan, plan!

for me, being organized & prepping ahead of time has been so helpful. even if things get a bit hectic or tough, having a routine to fall back on is key. here's how i do it!

google calendar

as soon as i have my class schedule, i input all my class meeting times on google calendar. then, based on whatever free space is left over, i allocate time for schoolwork and studying. here's the schedule i designed for this upcoming term:

make sure your study/ classwork time accounts for whatever online courses you're taking too. you should also include blocks for work, club meetings, etc. if they're recurring. i have google calendar linked to my phone so i get notifs for each time block.

planner

i recommend having a good planner. whether this is online or physical, depending on your preference, a weekly planner of your own is helpful for staying on top of work & having peace of mind.

the planner i use is the moleskine weekly planner. here is what it looks like inside:

on the left side i write all the tasks i have on each weekday (similar to the google calendar). on the right side, i list all the tasks i have to complete during that given week - i open the syllabi for all my classes and input whatever hw, assignments, projects, etc. are upcoming. i write them down in a checklist along with the date they're due. then, during my study blocks, i can check this page & decide what to work on!

note-taking & classwork

you should also have supplies for note-taking. some ppl prefer to take digital notes, so this means using your laptop or a tablet & stylus. personally, i like to take handwritten notes, so i bring loose-leaf lined paper & pencils to my lectures. i write the class name & date as the header for each page. when i'm done taking notes, i write the key topics in the top left-hand corner of the pager (in "no-man's land") so i can easily find the notes on specific topics when i'm flipping through them.

in terms of classwork, i recommend having a folder for each of your classes where you can store notes, assignments, tests, etc. i know some people use one big binder for all classes, but if you have a separate folder for each, you don't have to carry them all around on days when you only have two or three classes. i like the brand five star bc the folders are very durable and i've had the same ones all throughout uni!

for me, i've never been a huge notebook person b/c i like to keep my subjects separate so i rarely fill up an entire notebook. you can buy one to start with, and see once school starts if you think you need more!

other supplies

in terms of supplies, i'm honestly pretty minimalistic. the necessities for me are my planner, a folder & loose-leaf paper, and a pencil pouch with plenty of pens & pencils. i also bring my laptop & charger with me to school bc i use that for my online classes.

i do enjoy having cute supplies! i have a cute pink pencil pouch, glittery mechanical pencils, and fun pens. i also put stickers all over my laptop to give it a personal touch. i did a bit of embroidery on my backpack as well. you don't need to spend tons of money on aesthetic supplies, especially if it's something you won't have for long. but, finding simple ways to add a personal touch to your items can be fun & motivating!

step no. 2: make an action plan

i feel like it's easy to tell yourself you wanna do certain things or be a certain person during school. for example, i always want to be super studious, outgoing, & involved, but i used to struggle sm to actually do that. instead of only thinking of how you want to be, create actual steps/ tasks for yourself. here are my action items for inspo:

sit in the front row of every class - this can be daunting, but in my uni experience, wherever you sit in the first week becomes your (un)official assigned seat. get to class early, take a deep breath, and sit yourself down at the front! you'll be forcing yourself to stay at the front, but i promise it's fine! i really prefer this b/c if you & the prof get to class early you can chat a bit. also, when i wanna participate, i can speak at my regular volume & they'll hear me (rather than if i'm in the back row and had to scream). if nothing else, you'll become a familiar face!

attend office hours for each class at least once - i sometimes felt nervous/ anxious to go to office hours and talk to the professors & ta. but when you do it once, you realize they truly just want to help! getting to know the ppl who grade your assignments can be super useful. they might give you advice or info you don't get in lectures. plus, they are super knowledgeable!

raise your hand once per week - this forces you to be engaged with the content. i used to have such horrible social anxiety & the thought of speaking up in class & getting an answer wrong was my worst nightmare. and when i set this rule & began forcing myself to participate, i did make mistakes. but guess what... everyone moves on immediately. you might feel like the world is ending. it haunted me for weeks after 😢 but no one else cares! in the end, ppl will only remember that you were confident enough to raise your hand & speak up, not what you said. pls don't let your education suffer just b/c you're afraid some classmates might judge you! if raising your hand to answer problems is too daunting, start with asking clarifying questions & slowly build up to whatever you're able to do.

start a conversation with a classmate - having classmates that you're friendly with is so important. if you miss a lecture, need help on a concept, etc. you'll have someone you can turn to. and that's the least of it - you can end up making long-lasting friends! yes, it's scary to talk to a stranger. so, force yourself to do it as early as possible in the semester. an easy one - if you see someone sitting by an empty seat, ask if that seat is taken. if not, yay! it's go time 😊 sit by them and find something else to talk about - give them a (genuine & non-creepy) compliment, ask them if they've seen the syllabus, ask if they know the prof, etc. just something to get the convo started!! figure out their name, major, and other stuff too. once you've talked with them long enough to feel like you're getting along (whether that's after one class or multiple) ask for their number/ discord/ whatever so you can keep in touch! if they share your major, you should keep in contact with them b/c you might have other classes together in the future. but, again, in the best-case scenario, you have a new friend!

wear a cute outfit once per week - sometimes i would get a bit embarrassed or self-conscious to dress up for class. i forced myself to do it once per week, starting the first week of class, to set a precedent for myself. slowly i eased my way into wearing cute, fun outfits every day! no one is judging you as much as you are judging yourself, so have fun & be true to you.

step no. 3: study smarter, not harder

attending class is one thing, but you've got to put in the effort to study if you truly want to succeed. but, not all study methods will work for every single person. figure out how to study so you don't waste time with methods that don't work for you.

determine your learning style(s)

there are a few widely accepted learning styles. you've probably tried all of them throughout your time at school, so think back on which learning experiences have been most and least successful for you. then, connect them back to these learning styles to figure out ways you can most effectively study.

visual: if you learn by seeing info visually, such as with maps, graphs, diagrams, charts, etc.

auditory: if you learn by getting info in auditory form, aka when it's heard or spoken

kinesthetic: aka hands-on, if you learn by doing & applying

reading/writing: if you learn info best when it’s in words, aka by writing it down or reading it

you might find that multiple of these learning styles are effective for you, maybe there's one that sticks out as the most similar to your style of learning, or maybe one that just doesn't work for you. now, you don't need to assign yourself one and forego the rest, but you can adjust the time you spend on various study methods based on how well they work for you.

for me, i've realized over time that i am NOT a reading learner. in high school i would diligently read all the textbook assignments, spending hours getting through the chapters, only to retain none of it & do poorly on assignments & tests.

on the other hand, i respond really well to kinesthetic learning - when applying concepts hands-on, such as with practice problems, i have a much better understanding of concepts & retention.

fast forward to college - i spend very little time on assigned readings. in fact, sometimes i skip them all together 🫢 b/c if i spend an hour reading the textbook but retain none of it, that's an hour wasted. especially if the content from the textbook is going to line up with the lecture, i'm much better off paying attention & taking good notes in class, and then spending my study time doing practice problems. if i really do need to read the textbook, i have to make it interactive for myself - i answer the questions at the end of the chapter, take notes, quiz myself, etc.

now, my advice here isn't to skip textbook readings!! that's not something i recommend b/c for so many people, it IS effective and helpful! when it comes to studying, play on your strengths. don't try to force yourself to learn in a way that doesn't work for your brain. make modifications & prioritize your learning! here is an awesome guide to different methods that work for the various learning styles.

find your ideal study environment

you can also maximize the effectiveness of your studying based on the environment you're in. if you can decide what factors help or hinder your studying abilities, it will help you decide where you should make your go-to study spot!

at home or in public? sometimes, studying in a public place can be unproductive. it might make you feel more stressed (like the sensation of having your teacher look over your shoulder during a test 🫣) or distracted. for me, studying in public is actually useful b/c i'm less likely to get disctracted. if i'm in my room i might get tempted to open up tumblr or pinterest, but in public i feel like ppl might see me get off topic which deters me LOL. however, studying at home is nice b/c you're in the comfort of your own personal space - you can change into pjs, cuddle your pet, grab a snack, etc. i do a mix of studying in public & at home b/c i feel like they both have their benefits

quiet or noisy? do you study better in a silent environment, or do you like some sound/ white noise? personally, i cannot deal with ANY noise when i'm trying to study, it totally breaks my focus 😭but some people like the ambient/ white noise of a coffee shop

music or silence? similar to the last one, does having music help you stay focused, or distract you? i know ppl will swear by different things - classical music, upbeat music, songs in different languages, etc. again, i personally cannot handle any sounds 😅 but if music keeps you alert, plan accordingly - have earbuds or go to a coffee shop that has a playlist going

nature or indoors? maybe you find it stuffy to be indoors all day & studying out in the open air helps you stay grounded and calm. on the flipside, being exposed to the elements might just make you more distracted. if you like studying outdoors, try public parks with benches, and also see if your campus has outdoor seating areas. some libraries do too. for a happy medium, you can study someplace with large windows/ nice view.

independent or collaborative? do you study better on your own or in groups? you can join a study group or go to office hours to get a sense of studying in a group setting vs. alone. group studying can help hold you accountable, make it more interactive, and keep you focused. that being said, i def prefer studying independently. i like to go at my own pace, and tbh i get easily distracted w/ others and will begin to just chit chat

based on how you answer those questions, you can decide what your ideal study environment is & pick a go-to place! for me, based on my preferences, my most effective study environment going to the library alone or studying in my room.

that's all for this post! i feel it got very long but i had so many tips to share. there's no "one size fits all" guide to navigating uni life. but i think everyone can benefit from prepping in advance & being mentally prepared. knowing your own strengths + having a plan of attack will guide you in stressful/ uncertain times!

overall, take the time to get to know yourself & figure out how you can be at your very best. apply whichever bits of advice resonate, and ignore anything that's not gonna serve you. this is YOUR journey!

and remember, even with all the planning in the world, things can go unexpectedly. you are more than equipped to deal with whatever life throws your way! when you are faced with unexpected things - pause & think, assess the situation, & determine your best course of action. above all, YOU'VE GOT THIS! 💗

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karinakan · 8 months

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Want to learn something new in 2022??

Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)

40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)

Excellent basic crochet video series

Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)

Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)

How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)

Another drawing character faces video

Literally my favorite art pose hack

Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??

Introduction to flying small aircrafts

French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding

Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)

Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)

Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)

Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:

Calculus 1 (full semester class)

Learn basic statistics (free textbook)

Introduction to college physics (free textbook)

Introduction to accounting (free textbook)

Learn a language:

Ancient Greek

Latin

Spanish

German

Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)

French

Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)

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karinakan · 9 months

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How can I maintain my femme fatale appearance as a day time look? I am able to exude it when it comes to nighttime however, what would a daytime look be ?

Style outfits in dark colors and luxurious, tailored fabrics, but in more casual cuts (e.g. a black knit tank dress/slip dress, silk button-downs, casual blouses, tailored shorts, vests, dresses, skirts, blazers, vegan leather/leather basics, items with lace-up and lace-trim detailing, coated denim, etc.)

Wear pointed-toe shoes like flat slingbacks, kitten heel pumps/boots

Make a thin jet black cat-eye with standout black lashes and full brows the focal point of your makeup look. Save the red/deep-hued lipstick for nighttime

Embrace a shaggy bob, tousled waves, a layered lob, long layers, or a sleek bouncy hairstyle

Try a sensual floral, instead an outright seductive scent (think something like YSL Mon Paris)

Maintain good posture, eye contact, and clear, assertive communication – be playful when the situation deems it appropriate. Never forget your class or charm

Hope this helps xx

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karinakan · 9 months

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Femme Fatale Guide: Tips On How To Be A High-Value Woman

Table of Contents:

Prioritize Your Self-Respect Above All Else

Set & Uphold Clear Boundaries in Every Area of Life

Make A Deliberate Effort To Discover Your Values, Passions, & Boundaries

Build A Strong Personal Brand & Cult of Personality

Center All Aspects of Your Health & Well-Being

Read, Study, & Build A Strong Skillset

Consistently Invest in Your Appearance

Remain Dedicated To Lifelong Learning

Personalize Your Interactions & Learn Proper Etiquette

Master The Art of Engaging Conversation

Become Extremely Discreet Yet Utterly Shameless

Embrace Growth Without Succumbing To Your Perfectionist Expectations

HOW TO BE A HIGH-VALUE WOMAN:

Prioritize Your Self-Respect Above All Else: Get goals and standards that align with your needs in every area of life (career, finances, physical/mental/sexual health, emotional well-being, friends, family, intimate relationships, self-development). Express and act in alignment with your standards and dreams. Don't allow the displeasure of others to dictate your actions or daily activities.

Set & Uphold Clear Boundaries in Every Area of Life: State them calmly and clearly. "No" is a complete sentence. Reciprocate this effort to others. Practice the art of discernment, differentiation, and interdependence. Get to know yourself, and learn how to observe your needs independently of others' expectations and desires.

Make A Deliberate Effort To Discover Your Values, Passions, & Boundaries: Figure out what matters most to you in life. What activities, topics, aesthetics, art, clothing, hobbies, sounds, movements, books, television shows, movies, songs, and types of conversations most light you up inside? Here are some resources to guide your self-discovery journey HERE, HERE, and HERE.

Build A Strong Personal Brand & Cult of Personality: I have more tips on building your personal brand, creating your persona (or ‘Dream Girl archetype’), and an ultimate Femme Fatale playbook linked HERE, HERE, and HERE.

Center All Aspects of Your Health & Well-Being: Physical, Mental, Emotional, Sexual, and Spiritual. Celebrate your needs – they make you human. Eat a healthful, plant-based diet, exercise and walk daily, meditate, read at least 10 pages a day, journal, make to-do lists, declutter your space, self-pleasure, recite your affirmations, lean into shadow and mirror work, create morning and nighttime routines. Feeling in alignment is essential to allowing your magnetic aura to shine through. Find all my tips to cultivate self-regard in every area of life HERE.

Read, Study, & Build A Strong Skillset: Designing the life of your dreams is an inevitable aspect of living in your queen energy. Stay informed, read books and articles on your industry, interests, current events, cultural happenings, history, and any other topic that brings you joy or you would find intriguing if someone brought up the subject at a dinner party. Mastering an evergreen skillset is essential for succeeding in your career or building a business. Living in your queen energy means living in abundance. While queen energy is a mindset, it is impossible to fully live in this dream reality without having passions and your finances in order. Start with my entire Femme Fatale booklist HERE and guide to building your dream career HERE.

Consistently Invest in Your Appearance: Choose between investing time, money, or extra effort into upkeeping a polished style, beauty, grooming, and physique-maintaining routine. Wear clean, wrinkle-free, well-fitting clothes – styled and accessorized in a way that appears thoughtful & put together with impeccable grooming (clean hair, nails, skin, etc.). Stay consistent with your beauty/makeup/skincare routines, smelling nice daily, and maintain a scheduled routine (weekly, monthly, every 6 weeks, etc.) for specific treatments that make your life easier and make all the difference. These practices don't need to cost a lot of money. You choose to spend more money, time, or effort on these practices, depending on your personal preferences and based on your lifestyle and circumstances.

Remain Dedicated To Lifelong Learning: Make it a priority to read a few articles and 10 pages of a book daily. Ensuring keep up with your learning & education on different topics and the world is fulfilling and enables you to enter into a wider pool of conversations. This practice also strengthens your mind, sharpens focus, and helps your brain relax.

Personalize Your Interactions & Learn Proper Etiquette: Address people by name, and offer a firm handshake. Maintain eye contact. Say "please" and "thank you." RSVP promptly. Communicate clearly and compassionately. Make the person feel special and like the only individual in the room while introducing yourself. It’s the secret to leaving a lasting impression,

Master The Art of Engaging Conversation: Prioritizing self-presentation, learning how to listen, holding your own, and encouraging others to feel relaxed are the secrets to becoming magnetic in any social situation. Be mindful of how much you listen (more) and speak (less). Carefully consider your tonality and word choice. Remember and recounter the small details of another person’s anecdote that felt important to them. Acknowledge their emotions and validate them. Read more of my tips HERE.

Become Extremely Discreet Yet Utterly Shameless: Do as you please, but keep your business (or pleasure) to yourself. Privacy is peace, power, bliss, and radiates quiet confidence – the greatest telltale sign that someone is living in her queen energy. Learn to hold your own. You will be guaranteed to earn respect within seconds of gracing anyone's presence.

Embrace Growth Without Succumbing To Your Perfectionist Expectations: Remember that every skill, successful relationship, and goal takes time and experience. No one has it all figured out. It’s okay if you’re not where you expected to be or desire to be at this stage of your life. Stop comparing yourself – we all have our own paths. Choose to do one small thing every day to make your life better – either a step towards reaching a goal or indulging in a deep desire. Ensure there's a healthy (not necessarily equal) balance between the two. Leave your future self better than you found your past self. Express compassion towards yourself and acknowledge that you’re doing your best. Everything starts to make considerably more sense in hindsight.

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karinakan · 9 months

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People in general are visual but if men in particular are so visual then make them see your value.

This is the best way to weed out trash. Men will pay more attention to your behavior than your words. Stop wasting your time trying to tell him how valuable you are and show him.

-Yes, I'm at the spa AGAIN I will call you later.

-On vacation I'm staying at the (insert 5-star hotel/resort)

-Please send someone to carry my bags.

-Do not drop me off here, please pull up to valet.

-No I'm not coming outside this late, please reschedule. I'm going to bed.

-I'm enjoying wine and live music at (insert upscale lounge/restaurant)

-dress accordingly. If you want to be treated and approached with respect then dress accordingly

Credit Taneisha Fletcher

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karinakan · 1 year

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Femme Fatale Guide: How To Reduce Social Anxiety To Boost Your Confidence, Make Friends, & Become Magnetic

Some practical tips to reframe your thoughts going into social settings to help you boost your confidence and step into your power. Here's how to hold your own in every conversation, connect with anyone, and use the art of seduction, influence, and charm to become a social magnet to level up in every area of life.

HOW TO MANAGE SOCIAL ANXIETY:

Everyone Is Self-Conscious: Remember that, like yourself, everyone is more focused on (and critical of) how they’re presenting themselves and their actions, not yours. People care too much about how they look to overanalyze what you do. They often forget most (if not all) of the things you say in a casual conversation by the next day. Realizing that we all are too self-focused to really care about the small things others do or say is freeing. This reminder can help calm your nerves and reframe the situation to ease anxiety when you start to worry about what others are thinking of you in a social setting or during a conversation.

Prioritize Self-Presentation: Consider how confident you feel with your actions and self-presentation when interacting with others before worrying about their impressions of you. Focus on how you can show up as your best self when engaging in social activities and conversations. People notice when others like and feel comfortable with themselves. This quality is attractive to others and will make them feel more at ease when speaking to you. Interactions flow better when your conversation partner is relaxed, so finding ways to stay calm when speaking makes it easier to manage social anxiety. Allow your self-assurance to speak for itself. This ability to hold your own will radiate through your words, tonality, delivery, and mannerisms during any conversation. Simply put – People like others who already like themselves. Who you attract into your circle reflects the person you've decided to be.

Listen. More than you speak: This tip kills two birds with one stone – it allows you to sit back without worrying about what you need to say while allowing the other person to feel heard. The easiest way to be well-liked is to give people the space to share their thoughts, have them be valued, and feel understood. We have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Practice active listening to increase your charm. Use the information you uncover to drive the conversation. You don't necessarily need to be chatty or extroverted to be charismatic (more on this point later).

TIPS FOR SOCIALIZING & MAKING FRIENDS:

Get Curious To Connect: Follow-up questions are your best friend if you get nervous and anticipate a wave of social anxiety. These questions have a dual benefit: You’re allowing others to indulge in subjects or experiences that resonate with them and helping to guide the conversation. Listen to ways that you can branch off into related topics, mutual interests, and shared emotions or experiences. Ask relevant questions to keep the conversation flowing and demonstrates your interest and desire to connect with the other person. There’s no quality more charming than making others feel special and understood. This interpersonal skill allows you to connect with others without feeling like you need to fill up air time or be more vulnerable than you’re comfortable. It can be especially helpful to remember this advice when conversing with a stranger, authority figure, or someone else you want to impress without looking inferior (teacher, boss, industry leader, partner’s parents, etc.).

Read & Develop Interests/Opinions: Expanding your knowledge base provides an entry point to more people, engaging conversations, and opportunities. It’s easier to speak to people when you have some understanding of relevant topics others are discussing around the table or are of interest to the person in front of you. Take time to read about and study topics you’re interested in. Stay on top of cultural topics (movies, music, books, TV shows, etc.) and news within your chosen industry (or one you’re hoping to break into), different destinations you’ve been to or want to go to, favorite products, etc. Develop some robust opinions (don’t share those on hot-button topics like politics and religion) on these subjects and current events. Having the ability to listen to others' perspectives on a topic with an understanding of the subject matter and dive further into the topic with a distinct POV makes for an engaging conversation (and a potential new connection).

Learn The Art of The Follow-Up: If you hit it off with someone, exchange contact information (social media, phone number, email – depending on the context of the situation and level of initial connection). Send them a relevant message at some point over the next few days to stay connected. Try something related to the conversation – like an article on a topic you discussed, or a recommendation for a coffee shop in the area. Or, get more personal if you’re comfortable, and ask how a meeting went, if they ended up liking a certain show, movie, or book, or whether they want to grab lunch at that place they mentioned they love. Remain thoughtful and interested without looking desperate. People want to know others are thinking about them as long you’re not obsessive.

BEING EXTROVERTED VS. SOCIABLE:

Extroversion vs. introversion is about how you recharge. You can’t change this part of your nature. For some people, being around others for too long makes them feel exhausted no matter how comfortable they feel in the situation or enjoy the company. As an extroverted introvert, I’ve noticed that learning to be sociable is the key to connecting with others – even if you realize mid-conversation that you might need a week of reading a book in bed to bounce back from attending a couple of events.

Learn how to present yourself with relaxed, open body language. Smile, and make eye contact (but not too much). Speak slowly and carefully with pauses, so your conversation partner latches on to every word and is intrigued to hear more. Use your tone of voice to communicate the emotion behind your words. Ensure the other person is done speaking before responding. Nod your head to acknowledge the person’s talking points and show they’re heard. Laugh at the correct times to bond and share your sense of humor. Shake their hand firmly. Wave and hug goodbye (when appropriate).

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karinakan · 1 year

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Femme Fatale Playbook: How To Look More Expensive & Elevate Your Aura

Looking expensive or 'rich' is all about investing in yourself, your appearance, how you carry yourself, and not shying away from signature details or indulgences. Here are some tips to level up your look and demeanor to feel high-class in your daily life – no matter how much money you want to spend in these life arenas.

Appearance:

Prioritize Proper Grooming: Always looking clean and put-together is the ultimate sign of class. Shower daily. Brush, and take care of your teeth. Wash your hair on a regular schedule. Never allow your hair to look greasy – brush and blow dry it regularly. Cleanse, exfoliate, and moisturize every inch of your face and body. Perform your skincare routine religiously. Apply sunscreen daily.

Tailor & Steam Your Clothes: Freshly-pressed and well-fitting clothes always look infinitely more expensive – no matter their price point. Looking rich and expensive is about high self-regard and paying attention to the little details. Ensure your garments look crisp and clean – no wrinkles, pet hairs, loose threads, lint pieces, or fabric bulges highlighting an improper fit.

Create A Classic & Streamlined Capsule Wardrobe: Simplicity radiates a chic sophistication. Go back to the basics with timeless pieces – like a button-down blouse, a classic crewneck sweater, black trousers or straight-leg jeans, leather pants, a leather jacket, a trench or wool coat, a well-fitting cami or tee shirt, a simple slip dress, or a knit set. Focus on a neutral color palette – black, champagne, dark grey, chocolate brown, camel, or crisp white shades. Seek out elevated fabrics – such as Pima cotton, cashmere, washable silk, and buttery vegan or recycled leather.

Invest In Signature Pieces: Spend on "outer shell' items – coats, jackets, heavyweight knits, handbags, and shoes – that directly interact with the outside world and can be worn repeatedly with almost every outfit. Save on items like tee shirts or more simple jewelry pieces that can be found for less while still being fairly high-quality. I recommend Everlane, Lilysilk, and Naadam for affordable basics (Frankie Shop, Skims, and Norma Kamali for moderately priced pieces) and Catbird and Oma The Label for well-priced accessories. Here are all the everyday essentials you need to build the ultimate Femme Fatale Wardrobe.

Simplify Your Beauty Routine: Fresh, clear, and glowy skin radiates rich girl energy. A well-curated skincare routine should do half the heavy lifting. However, you will probably want to include a shade-matched foundation, concealer, and powder into your makeup routine along with a bronze contour, a rosy blush, and a subtle highlighter. Shape and fill in your brows for a polished look. Apply a deep black mascara to your lashes and luscious black eyeliner to your top lid, waterline, and tight line – keep the strokes thin and crisp (create a subtle wing if desired). Finish your face with a deep pink nude, red, or deep wine lipstick/gloss/lip tint. Here's a guide to the ultimate Femme Fatale Beauty Routine for a completely elevated (and sensual) look.

Eat Healthfully & Workout: Health is wealth. Taking care of your body shows self-respect – your most priceless asset. So, incorporate whole, plant-based foods into your daily diet and make it a priority to find movement you love that you can incorporate into your routine multiple times a week.

Lifestyle:

Streamline The Details: The rich girl aesthetic is all about refinement and looking put together at all times. Always have a set of matching pens with coordinating notepads on your desk, a uniform set of coffee mugs on the counter, coasters, glassware, sheets, pillowcases, cold-weather accessories, etc. This attention to detail instant makes your environment look more expensive.

Have Personalized Stationery: A high-value woman isn't shy about leaving her signature touch. Have personalized stationery (thank you notes, greeting cards, business cards, etc.) monogrammed and on hand for anytime you need to send a note or gift to a friend, coworker, boss, client, etc. This addition shows your attention to detail, leaves the recipient something small to remember you by, and adds a human touch to any gift or gesture. Try gold lettering on cream cards for an elegant, expensive look.

Keep Prosecco & Sparkling Water On Hand: Bubbly on a budget feels just as expensive as champagne (and tastes great too). Sparkling water elevates your daily H20 – add some lemon, lime, orange wedges, or frozen berries for a fancy, fruity twist.

Have Proper Place Settings: Neat, thoughtful presentation exudes class and rich energy. Whenever hosting any type of sit-down event or cocktail party, have the plates stacked, glasses and cutlery arranged correctly. Have all of the appropriate utensils readily available. Again, it's all about the details.

Stay Informed & Well-Read: A thirst for knowledge, learning and having the ability to engage in thoughtful, informed, and intellectual imbues a high-class radiance into any room. Read books, learn about different cultures and current events, and invest in studying different industries, and interests. Explore your hobbies. A rich mindset translates and generates an overall elevated aura.

Demeanor:

Learn Proper Etiquette: Address people by name, and offer a firm handshake. Maintain eye contact. Say "please" and "thank you." RSVP promptly. Communicate clearly and compassionately.

Maintain Good Posture: Shoulders back and relaxed. Open your chest. Keep your back straight and your head held high. Take up space. Command presence.

Embrace An Abundant Mindset: Free your mind of limiting beliefs and notions of scarcity. There are plenty of opportunities, experiences, and emotions to go around. Another person's success doesn't take away from your potential. Focus on expansion, not envy.

Remain Confident & Unbothered: Believe in yourself. Invest in your well-being. Prioritize your goals and block out the noise from anyone trying to tear you down or criticize you for your ambition, goals, or desires. Stay in your own lane. Allow others to do the same. This is how you level up to elevate into your queen energy to create a rich life and design your dream reality.

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karinakan · 1 year

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5 level-up & hypergamy youtubers you need to watch

Hey yall! this is part 2 of my favourite Youtuber list CLICK HERE to view it!

I thought I’d share some of my favourite feminine/level-up/pro-hypergamous YouTube channels. Some of them directly talk about femininity, etiquette, or growing towards becoming a better person.

In no particular order, here are my top 5 favourite YouTube channels about femininity, levelling up, hypergamy, and inspiration for generally becoming a better version of myself. I hope you enjoy them too.

KWUCOCO✨

My black SBs and spoiled girlfriends know about this babe!

youtube

Kwucoco (Kamanda) is a 27-year-old Cameroonian native. Residing in the heart of Boston, Massachusetts. She is an aspiring real estate agent. Coco is a kept woman her vlogs include herself displaying the various gifts she receives from her many "admirers", "friends" and sugar daddies. Although she mainly makes vlogs of her day-to-day life. She does drop advice on how she became the high-value woman she is today!

Woman of elegance ✨

Woman of elegance is the ultimate guide in teaching women from all corners of the globe how to be elegant, refined and polished ladies.

youtube

This online finishing school was created by Vivienne Abena who is passionate about being polished and refined. helping women across the globe with style and proper etiquette.

CodenameChannel✨

The hypergamy and level-up guru! if you're a black woman and you ready to learn how to put yourself in the right places to level up? She's the one to go to!

youtube

Lisa Hart✨

Lisa is a fashion designer and blogger from France who loves old Hollywood glamour and belly dance, which she draws upon in a number of her videos.

youtube

In her videos, she discusses style, beauty, femininity, elegance, deportment, glamour, and grace.

Into a Milli✨

Into a milli (Karina) is an entrepreneur running an online business and she also makes videos discussing women, money, and power. On her channel, she talks about internal growth, elegance, beauty, wealth, business, etiquette, romantic relationships, and what she considers the ills of society.

youtube

Hope you all loved this list don't forget to check out Part 1 HERE

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karinakan · 1 year

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Doses of Glamour ⚜️

Networking and the Social Hierarchy:

Education & Career

Some personal background on my upbringing, both my late grandfather and father were influential in the political and business sector. We’d host politicians, two of whom are presidents today actually, their business colleagues and we were constant fixtures at society events.

The importance of networking is one of the most valuable things both the men in my life taught me. They were constantly building and nurturing relationships, irrespective of the individuals place on the totem pole. My father never failed to mention that it was the biggest component to his success.

If you’re not making an effort to expand your network and climb the social ladder, I can only assume you have no desire to advance in your career or improve your dating prospects. The sooner you understand that everyone is trying to achieve some kind of upward or social mobility, is the moment you’ll no longer pedestalize individuals in a higher social class and move through the spaces that once intimidated you with ease.

Hierarchies are omnipresent in all societies weather you’re aware of this or not. The social hierarchy is defined as an implicit or explicit rank order of individuals or groups with respect to a valued social dimension. Social hierarchies are influenced by income, wealth, education and occupation.

Based on where you presently rank in the social hierarchy the strategies you’ll implore for your advancement into a higher social class and the circles you’ll target will differ. As you advance up the pyramid your strategies for further advancement will have to be reevaluated and adjusted.

With that being said, here are the key factors that will determine your upward mobility in today’s social hierarchy as well as

How to navigate the challenges that come along with these factors.

How to achieve upward mobility in your education and career through networking strategies.

Education:

I can’t emphasise enough how important it is that you get an education. If you have the opportunity to go to college weather it be an Ivy League or a community college please do so. If neither of those options are financially accessible to you, make use of free online courses, paid certifications and YouTube university.

There are a lot of well paying job opportunities that don’t require a college degree (I’ll do a post on this if anyone is interested) What’s important is that you become an expert at something, find what you’re skilled at and master it. Focus on mastering your skills through internships and practical training programs as it will equip you with experience making your transition into the workforce easier.

Where to find online courses and certifications:

Hubspot Academy

Edx

Coursera

Udemy

Future Learn

Stanford Online

Alison

DataCamp

Cybrary

Codecademy

On that note when you’re pursuing your education you must be networking by:

Connecting with professors, when they are well connected they could refer you for internship opportunities and write recommendation letters for you.

Making contact with professionals in your desired industry for guidance and mentorship opportunities through LinkedIn

Attending networking events related to your desired industry, to build a network of industry professionals thus opening doors for career opportunities in the future.

Joining industry and role specific Facebook and LinkedIn job groups, a lot of career opportunities are posted there by company employees and recruiters.

It’s always a plus when the job posting in the group is posted by a company employee, if you ask kindly most don’t mind putting in a good word for you to get your resume at the top of the pile of resumes.

Career:

Finding a well paying job at a entry level (entry level refers to 1-2 years of experience) can present as a challenge for many but it is not impossible.

Here are two ways to combat this challenge:

By mastering high paying hard and soft skills within your desired field. Hard skills are learned abilities acquired and enhanced through practice, repetition, and education. Hence why outside of your educational pursuits you should be acquiring these hard skills through online courses, training programs and internships as mentioned above.

Soft skills include attributes and personality traits that help employees interact with others and succeed in the workplace. Showcasing and highlighting both hard and soft skills in your resume will help you stand out with recruiters. ( I’ll do a post on resumes if anyone is interested as I’ve got HR experience) So it’s imperative that you research hard and soft skills within your desired industry for long term success.

I will always reiterate that the key to succeeding at any goal isn’t to work hard but rather to work smart. The second way to land a well paying job at a entry level is by targeting emerging or growing industries with a low-medium entry barrier. Research these industries, the roles that are most in demand and the skills required for that role then pursue the role that aligns with your personal career goals.

A obvious example of such an industry is the tech industry, there are plenty of technical and non technical roles that pay an average of 60k and upwards from customer success,sales,operations and digital marketing ( digital marketing skills are high in demand due to the technological age we live in). I am highlighting the tech industry because a lot of the opportunities in the tech industry are remote, meaning you have a shot at a well paying job regardless of what country you live in (Remote work from all industries can be found on LinkedIn)

As a career woman you should be networking by:

Attending top industry events hosted by successful companies and recognized industry professionals.

Ensuring that you purchase the best tickets for these events as they normally grant you access to VIP lounges, granting you the opportunity to expand your network into the realm of managers, directors and executives.

Joining a master mind group, a master mind group being a peer-to-peer mentoring group used to help members solve their problems with input and advice from the other group members.

Joining business organizations, as this will expand your network and offer you opportunities to grow in your career.

Where to find networking and industry specific events:

Eventbrite

Meetup

Allevents.in

Event Browse

The Business Journals

All conference alert

By joining your city’s chamber of commerce

Conclusion:

We all have different starting posts, by no means does that imply that you will not be successful at the goals you’ve set for yourself. I am simply stating that your goals should be paced in terms of your present circumstances, so that you are fully equipped for the position you desire to hold in society. There are two other key factors in addition to the ones mentioned above that I will expand on in another post.

Signed

Doses of Glamour ⚜️

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karinakan · 1 year

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“a lot of hypergamy girls don't realize that these men aren't stupid, they can see right through some basic literature quoting and posturing, and a lot of these circles also don't value intellectual rigor.”

So with regards to this point mentioned by anon let’s primarily keep in mind that all affluent circles are different. What they value will differ based on location, culture, upbringing, age demographic, often their religious views or lack there of. We can debate on this point for days on end about what we’ve encountered in different affluent circles and what rules we feel apply. There will be commonalities, but also a lot of differences in terms of what is valued.

Especially when we get niche specific, what I mean by niche specific is when you’re targeting affluent circles within different industries such as (business, tech, finance,science,medicine) or weather you’re wanting to break into clubs centred around hobbies such as (sailing,golfing,horse riding,art,academia, cycling) Different sets of rules will always apply from one circle to another for example if you become a member of the explorers club, you’ll come to find out that the people there value intellectual rigour and a curiosity for knowledge, because that is their ethos so you’ll easily build relationships there if that is a genuine interest of yours.

Anon is 100% correct though they can see through posturing. So in conclusion the key to overcoming this hurdle and successfully breaking into certain affluent circles in my opinion is to

1.) Get niche specific so that you’re building relationships with like minded people initially based off of your shared interests.

2.) Ensure this is a genuine interest and passion of yours, if it isn’t it will be easily detectable. You don’t have to know everything about what you’re interested in just a willingness to learn.

3.) Observe. Observe. Observe, humans are easily readable and what separates a unsuccessful social climber to a successful one is the ability to observe, learn and understand the environment you’re in to avoid making certain faux pas.

4.) If the circle you’re attempting to break into aren’t looking to expand their network to more people and are intent on gatekeeping, do not embarrass yourself by trying mold yourself to fit in with them. Just move on it’s never that deep

5.) Remember that every single person is or was a social climber in high society, they presently might not be but their great grandmother was. So there is absolutely no reason for you to be intimidated by them when most of them are just masking their insecurities underneath their Burberry coats.

6) Focus on finding your tribe of both affluent men and women who’s company you enjoy, rather than performing like a circus monkey to appeal to a group of people you don’t even like. Start with yourself and think about the kind of people you’d enjoy socialising with. The world is evolving at an extremely rapid pace. As someone in both business and tech, I can tell you that the number of millionaires keeps increasing by the day, so there is a man and a circle out there for you!

Thank you for coming to my Tedtalk 😂

THIS. IS. THE. BEST. ADVICE. EVER.

And I agree with absolutely everything you said. 😊

Very very true that every single circle is going to have its nuances so flexibility and ability to read a room is so incredibly important!

Also LOVE that you mentioned the importance of actually socializing with people you have shared interests with! Getting invited to exclusive events is great and all but if it means surrounding yourself with people you have nothing in common with, it's going to feel like torture.

Thank you for your Tedtalk. I loved it. It was incredibly enlightening.

💙

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