what is it that makes siblings so good at insulting your fashion?

elon musk admitted under threat of perjury that this is his burner account

i think this is literally the worst sound effect i have ever heard in my entire life

within fifteen minutes i have found two different grown adult men who have dating app profiles that say their worst fear is:

werewolves.

one was funny. two is like... hang on, do we actually have a werewolf problem in this town?

This has got to be the worst recipe in this manga yet

Garden Variety Dykes: Lesbian Traditions in Gardening, 1994

occasional posts from users

oh fuck yes

this may just be me going into overanalysis mode but i feel like the choreography of spellcasting can tell you so much about a magic user. a snap of the fingers, for example, implies confidence, even arrogance, while hands thrust out and straining to the fingertips suggests desperation, throwing one's whole body into the spell as though hoping the physical effort will make a difference. rapid, jerky body language tells you that a spellcaster is passionate and reckless, while graceful, fluid movements demonstrate calm and concentration. some magic users may choose to stomp their feet or clap their hands when casting, channeling power through percussive motion, whilst others may see magic as a tool separate from the self, and focus is through objects like a wand or staff. a new spellcaster just coming into their power may be tentative and slow, but a practiced study of magic will be able to rely on muscle memory to guide them.

dmv: can i have you birth certificate

me: i dont have it but you can trust! 😁✌️

dmv: ok! 😁✌️here is your license

me: its so small and cute! 😳

dmv: just like you! ☺️

researching parrying daggers as a fun little treat and i'm delighted by how much every single one of these things looks like it's designed to be as annoying as possible

are you in a good headspace to receive my triple barrage hell nightmare skeleton attack right now.

nobuddy feels like they have a sharp attention span these days, right? and we all just click “agree on terms of service” because its hard to love yourself sometimes, well

enter Terms of Service, Didn’t Read: a website and a browser addon that streamlines the terms of service of many popular web services to be read by the tech sunday drivers.

It’s graded from A (great) to E (awful) and if you have the addon you have access to the info about the website on your bar

I recently had surgery, and at the time I came home, I had both my cat and one of my grandma's cats staying with me.

- Within hours of surgery, I wake up from a nap to my cat gently sniffing at my incisions with great alarm.

- I was not allowed to shower the first day after surgery, and the cats, seeing that The Large Cat is not observing its cleaning ritual, decided I must be gravely disabled and compensated by licking all the exposed skin on my arms, face, and legs.

- I currently have to sleep with a pillow over my abdomen because my cat insists on climbing on top of me and covering my incisions with her body while I sleep (which is very sweet but not exactly comfortable without the pillow). She also lays across me facing my bedroom door, presumably on guard for attackers who may try to harm me while I'm sleeping and injured.

That's love. 🐈‍⬛🐈❤️