my dad is bald

a body trying to disappear

o btw my boyfriend broke up w me but hey I literally lost 50 pounds in 3 months so w/e hahhaahhahaha ha ha a

I'm so tired of making excuses for my weird eating habits like next time someone asks me why I'm not eating I'm just gonna be like because BRENDA I'm terrified of BUTTER ???

so proud of my organs for unionizing. would be great if it wasn't against me but you can't win them all i guess.

I just want to live in my dad’s Instagram fyp where somehow it’s still 2019

finally reached the point in my adult life where I actually empty the dishwasher when the dishes are clean and then gradually load it throughout the week as I produce dirty dishes. this has truly been a revelation and I’ve never felt so on top of my shit in my life FUCK

would you prefer to learn French or Italian before you die?

the threatening aura of this message reads like it was sent by the duolingo owl

I wanna do one of those “what I eat in a day” videos but instead of green juice and avocado toast it’s just 4 iced coffees and a bunch of eggo waffles

If I get mad at him and am “too angry” or “come at him too hot” PF COURSE he can’t be expected to apologize because I wasn’t nice about being mad at him :) meanwhile :) if he’s upset by something :) he can bring it up in any goddamn dickhead way he wants and IM EXPECTED TO APOLOGIZE

I HATE IT HERE

My boyfriend got mad at me last night because I was hammered and let my best friend (who was also hammered) sleep in our bed. She was supposed to sleep on the couch but his friends were all over hanging out so she couldn’t fall asleep in the living room. He waited an HOUR for his friends to leave so he wouldn’t have to look like an asshole in front of them and then just fucking rages at me for letting her sleep there and makes me GO WAKE HER UP at like 2 in the fucking morning after she’s been asleep for an hour and tell her to go sleep on the couch. Thankfully she was out so cold I literally couldn’t wake her up but like, how are you THIS shitty of a host? Like what is wrong with you? Not to mention he literally never has to do anything inconvenient for me or my friends meanwhile I spend 90% of my free time with his friends who are all absolutely whack as fuck. I quit. Fuck this. I’m not putting effort into his friends anymore, fuck him and fuck them.

I would like to thank my bitch of a sister for teaching me that it’s always okay to be a confrontational, bossy bitch if it means you’re standing up for yourself or others. so yes I will be accosting and/or pepper spraying any man who makes me or anyone around me feel unsafe :)

I just know I'm gonna end up like those adults I dreaded ending up like. the ones with no friends with a dead end job that they fucking hate. my current career path basically guarantees a boring ass existence in a lab surrounded by old rich white people and apathetic surfer bros

fuck the EDD

I'm pretty sure I owe the unemployment department like $9000 because my former employer like, lied about my wages??? I don't even know, they're basically claiming I earned money that I didn't. So I'm fucked because I'm literally broke. I wish I just hadn't collected unemployment honestly because now I just have $9000 of debt and all I did was buy weed and order doordash

this is my diary now btw sorry I can't afford therapy lmao

Do you ever just

constantly come up with different reasons that you’re a piece of shit? and like, you can recognize all of them so clearly but don’t have the strength or energy to do fucking ANYTHING about them?? like, man I wish I was a better daughter and didn’t live 3,000 miles from my parents, but am I going to visit more or call my family? probably not, because I am a miserable piece of garbage. I wish I didn’t fucking eat so much and drank more water and less coffee because I literally feel like absolute death every single day but will I make those changes?? ABsolutely not. I want to think that I’d do anything for the people I love - like if my mom told me she wished I called more, I would call more. and while I should certainly assume she does wish I called more, I still don’t. fuck man I don’t know. I’m a piece of shit. maybe I’ll just do anything for the people I love within the limits of what I feel like doing. like, if Wyatt wanted me to go hang out with his friends and I just wasn't up to it, I wouldn’t go. because I’m a shitty girlfriend. but I did go out with him and his friends, so maybe I would. because I did. FUCK I’m selfish. I’m selfish and I hate myself. I need therapy and a bong rip. but I know I should smoke less weed, because I’m high every day