TOM HOLLAND as Nathan Drake

Uncharted (2022) Final Trailer | dir. Ruben Fleischer

Five Nights at Freddy's (2023) // FNAF The Musical

the fight is harder each year.

Love this new adaptation of my favourite children book famous five

# hot doc with the hair (for anon x)

Holy hell... we're in trouble. So much trouble.

THE ARTFUL DODGER, 1.06 "Bully in the Alley"

more artful dodger bts via nicholas burton on tiktok

Bruce doesn’t even register it anymore because Jason, being Jason, tried LITERALLY EVERYTHING, so Bruce is ready for anything. Nothing surprises him anymore in regards to his Gremlin Children…

BRUCE'S LACK OF EXPRESSION IS KILLING ME HERE, HE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE A SINGLE SOLITARY FACE WHEN DAMIAN LAUNCHES HIMSELF AT THE ALLY THEY'VE GONE TO MEET THIS IS A DAD WHO HAS RAISED THREE HORRIBLE GREMLINS AND IS WORKING ON THE FOURTH AND HE DOESN'T EVEN BLINK JUST STICKS THE DAD ARM OUT TO HOLD HIS KID BACK FROM KICKING AN ELF IN THE SOLAR PLEXUS NO THOUGHT JUST PURE BATDAD INSTINCT YOU KNOW DICK AND JASON DID THE EXACT SAME THING ALL THE TIME AND BRUCE DOESN'T EVEN REGISTER IT ANYMORE

MOVIES WATCHED IN 2018 ☰ The Man Who Invented Christmas (2017) dir. Bharat Nalluri

“No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of another.“

Stock associate got distracted

Black cats are lucky. (via leahweissmuller)

Well done for getting this PERFECTLY in the voice and Style of Bob Hale! Well done!

you wonder why the scots were so unstable, then you look at their monarchy and realise they had seven child monarchs in a row. oh your king's a twelve-year-old? that sucks. what, he's been assassinated? huh! good thing his heir-- HE'S SIX? good thing he isn't going to die a ridiculous death like getting blown up by a cannon any time soon! BUT NOT FOR LONG! what, he was actually blown up by a cannon? wow. anyway, we're leaving the throne in the capable hands of a nine-year-old. that won't go wrong! OR SO WE THOUGHT! well, at least it wasn't a cannon that took him out this time, just a little bit of rebellion and war. and we're leaving the throne in the capable hands of a competent and popular ruler.

BUT NOT FOR LONG! this idiot gets absolutely wrecked at the hands of the english. and by wrecked, i mean killed. great news for henry viii, terrible news for little one-year-old jamie (his nephew, i should point out), a.k.a. your highness, and fifth in a long line of idiots called james. (you'd think they'd learn to pick another name.) things work out eventually, right up until henry viii's lot come back onto the scene and get into a bunch of fights with the scots. unbelievably, things are about to get so much worse. in a real smart move, james dies at the grand old age of thirty. (i feel the need to point out that none of these jameses lived past the age of forty-two. and that's being generous.)

enter mary. she's catholic! she's not called james! she's the queen of scotland! and guess how old she is? six days! yes, you heard that right - six days. (and you thought six years was bad.) she's eventually whisked away to live in france and later marry the dauphin, handily solving the problem of the english trying to kidnap her and marry her off to edward vi. (she's five at this point. edward is ten. françois, the dauphin, is three. don't think too hard about any of that.)

they grow up. edward dies at fifteen. mary i, best known for her fondness for barbecues, dies five years later. françois, sensing a trend, dies two years after that at sixteen. mary returns to scotland, and all is well.

OR SO WE THOUGHT! whilst england was busy being torn apart by religious matters, scotland was busy being torn apart by religious matters. (you'll never guess what's happening in france.) mary, of course, is a devout catholic. some of the scots, who have spent twelve years without a monarch, let alone a catholic girl raised in france, are... not. rebellions! political instability! back to the status quo, basically. john knox is not happy, but when is he ever? elizabeth i kindly tries to help things by sending her bestie robert dudley (yes, that robert) to marry mary. this, unsurprisingly, does not go down well. fortunately, mary solves all these problems by creating a new one: she marries her half-cousin, henry lord darnley! yuck! i mean, yay! more rebellion (led by mary's half-brother)! henry turns on mary because he wants more power! he allies with the protestant lords, and they stab mary's private secretary to death in front of her whilst she's pregnant! the usual.

BUT NOT FOR LONG! mary and henry escape, they have a lovely little son called james (they still hadn't learn their lesson about scottish jameses), and they all live happily ever after until henry's house is blown up and he's found smothered outside in broad daylight. suspects include: everyone in scotland. but mostly lord bothwell, who proceeds to kidnap mary and marry her. now, you may struggle to believe this, but things go downhill from here. mary is eventually forced to abdicate, and flees to england. bothwell is imprisoned in denmark, and later goes insane. as for james, now the one-year-old james vi (anyone sensing a pattern here?), well, he's probably too busy learning to speak to care. because, you know, he's one. some people never learn.

from this point onwards, mary's kept under house arrest by elizabeth i. in a display of gratitude towards elizabeth, mary promptly spends the rest of her life plotting against her. or being involved in plots. in the meantime, james's regent, also called james stewart (mary's aforementioned half-brother; the name is cursed), earns the dubious honour of being the first head of government to be assassinated with a firearm. eventually, after mary, that virtuous angel, actively tries to kill elizabeth, elizabeth gets fed up and drops a sword on mary's neck. james, who last saw his mother at the age of zero years old, must have been devastated.

you all know what happened next: elizabeth died at the grand old age of sixty-nine, and james inherited the throne. thus followed decades of religious instability, parliamentary infighting, and stubborn monarchs who refused to listen to reason, which were surely new to the elizabethans. james, who was what is commonly known these days as a "hot mess" or "bisexual disaster" - don't quote me on that - was nearly blown up in a plot masterminded by a guy called tosser. sorry, i mean a tosser called guy. he also pissed everyone off by being a bit too buddy-buddy with several men, possibly lovers. (probably lovers.) that was not the end of the curse of james stewart (see: james ii of england), but it did at least put an end to mary queen of scots. oh, and england and scotland were united. that too. cue much chaos with a man you've probably heard of, named oliver cromwell... the rest is history. i mean, all of this is history, but you know what i mean.

and that's the story of why having seven child monarchs in a row is a really fucking bad idea!

Tudor Week 2023

Day Six: Favourite portrayal of a Tudor family member

Helen Mirren and Glenda Jackson as Elizabeth I Romola Garai as Mary I Oliver Zetterström as Edward VI

Richard III in The White Queen "The Price of Power"

rhaewin being soft with their boys