adamburrell @jadeameliabadwi #curlysue #getweirdtour

“We’re the best of friends, we worked so hard on the x-factor and of course we’re the only group to ever win it so that was a massive achievement and we just can’t believe that we’re here in America.”

jesymix14 We love the natural look 💁

jadeameliabadwi: he takes amazing photos that Jed chap.

Jai: After basically pouring his feelings out, she still couldn't seem to move past this all. So instead of pleading and continuing, he just stopped and wiped his tears quickly. "Fine, Jade. Fine."

Jade: "I'm being realistic here, Jai. If we got together now, I'd be worried you'd leave again, and you'd be worried I'm not in it with you. That's not a good start to a relationship."

Jai: "Well, I know I fucked up. I don't think you'll ever understand how bad I feel. There were so many times that I'd want to text or call you, but I didn't because I figured you wouldn't want to talk to me. You're Jade from Little Mix for fuck's sake. I'm just some guy. You can find so many others that are better than me. But that's not the point. I was scared that this wouldn't develop into anything because you said you don't do relationships, but I was also scared that it was turning into something. All I know is, I missed you. A lot. We have too much history to just ignore." That's when he paused, tears welling up. "Do you know how mad I am at myself that I didn't facetime you when Beau was doing something stupid? Or send you a snap of Hamlet? Knowing Kiana and Chelsey talked to you more than I did? I'm so sorry, Jade. I'm so fucking sorry."

Jade: "Stop-stop, stop putting yourself down like that. I liked you. That's what mattered. And I'm not ignoring this. If I was I wouldn't be talking to you right now." It felt colder outside, then. She figured it was the sinking of her heart at seeing him well up. Her gaze turned away. "I know you're sorry. I get that. But it can't just change this. If we have any chance of getting to where we were, we need to work up to it. I need to... to trust you. And I can't do that right now."

Jai: Jade was still a puzzle that Jai had yet to solve. It seemed like part of her hated him, but the other part wanted him around. He was torn, especially with the set of sad eyes that were glued to his. "You can't shut down on me now. Just tell me what you want. /Please/. Don't shut me out. And if you are, don't look at me like that or I'm going to want to hold you and force you to hate me a little less." Typical Jai; always trying to make things a bit humorous.

Jade: "I don't hate you." That was the problem. Or, part of it anyway. She was insanely aggravated that he left without telling her and didn't talk to her for months, but she couldn't even bring herself to hate him. She wanted to. More than most things. It would make her life so much easier. Life never was so kind, however. "I don't-I don't know what I want. I'm confused."

Jai: He immediately regretted pulling away. If it was up to him, he'd hold her hand all night. But by the looks of it, everything they had was slowly being erased right in front of his eyes. He was shocked at how standoffish she was being. "I guess not." he shrugged, trying his best to be nonchalant. "So I guess we're done. For good. I won't bother you anymore, okay?"

Jade: It was amazing how one second Jade could be talking about expressing how you feel, and the next bottling up everything she had for dear life. She had reason though, right? Falling back into Jai wasn't a good idea. Couldn't be a good idea. Her mouth said nothing, mind blank with anything to say. She wanted to whimper and cry, just like she had after he'd left. Why could she have him right there and not do anything about it?

Jai: "I know you know that you're right." She wasn't going to make this easy for him. So he had to prove that the good outweighed the bad in this situation. And what happened next made him want to prove it even more: Her touch. He hadn't felt it in 2 months and all the memories washed over him. It was soft and gentle like herself. She genuinely cared that he was stressed. /Goddamn/ this was more than he could handle. Slowly, he released the swings and gently pulled away from her. "I know, I know. Can we get back to us? I can deal with that on my own time. I didn't mean to vent to you like a gi- like everything's a-okay in Jai and Jade's likemance."

Jade: She didn't know when the tables had turned so far that she put herself on him and he pulled away. It was a bad decision all together she knew, but she tried her hardest to not let her mind tell her it was because of her that he pulled away. "It's fine. Is there really more to talk about?"

Jai: He clenched the swing, knuckles white. Maybe she was right. Communication wasn't something he mastered just yet. Perhaps it was because he didn't think anyone had a strong desire to keep in contact with him, and that's how he felt with Jade. He was just some Youtuber who happened to catch feelings for Jade from Little Mix. She was in the biggest Girl group, why would she care to talk to him? But of course he'd never tell her that. It would just sound like another excuse. "He's enjoying LA. It has a lot to offer. A lot more than our Youtube career. And I think he's starting to see that. I don't think he'll leave the Janoskians, I just miss my best friend. But I don't want to hold him back. But you're right." he faced her again.

Jade: "I know I'm right." Okay maybe her bitterness was dipping over into her compassion. She looked over to him to see him looking at her. His grip was tight on the metal of the swing, stressed. Against her better judgement, she reached out a hand to cup over one of his, thumb rubbing against his knuckles in an act of comfort. "You have to tell him that. It might not be easy, but you have to. You're brothers."

Jai: They both seemed to care for each other, but neither could move forward. Jade was still upset with him and he understood. But it didn't make this any easier. "'Dunno he's just always out with his other friends, making his music, all that." he shrugged and finally retreated back to the swings next to her. "It's frustrating. He didn't even fucking film Life of a Dys-." he paused and laughed slightly. "Just a video we all should've been in. After that video, I was planning to come back here so I don't know why he didn't film with us."

Jade: She started swinging again as he sat down next to her, just as far as her rocking foot would take her, which probably ended up to be a foot or two. Maybe it was easier to just be like how they were. It wasn't smart, but she could spare it for a few minutes. Probably. "Obviously, communication isn't your strong suit. You need to talk to him, Jai. Or someone needs to. I'd think it'd be you considering how close you two are. Just talk to him."

Jai: "I had shit to settle at home. James uh, he has boxes in his room. I think he's trying to move out and not tell us." Shit. He was talking to her as if nothing happened, like everything was normal. But he couldn't help it. He felt so comfortable around Jade, it was hard to hold back. "But uh, I kinda wish you would've burned it or something like that. It would've been sick to see." he teased.

Jade: It was pretty evident that Jai was wanting to change the subject but-- Maybe it was her compassion. Maybe it was lingering care for Jai. Whatever it was, it made her not want to give up so easily. Her eyebrows furrowed, "Why haven't you talked to him?"

Jai: Her answer left Jai smiling. He was reluctant to step closer to her, so he remained in the same spot. A sense of hope washed over him. Maybe he still had a chance to make things right. He honestly thought she threw all of his stuff away. "'Dunno. I'm just glad you didn't."

Jade: Jade sighed, "I hoped you would come back for a lot longer than I'm proud of. I didn't throw away anything you gave me." Maybe a part of her was still holding on then, but she knew she shouldn't. Their future was uncertain. Even if she could forgive him, take him back if that's what he wanted, there would still be the uncertainty.

if you’re running for president, can i be your vice president? or does that have to go to an american citizen too? you know what, who cares, you should make me vice president anyway.

Introductions are not really my forte, but I can spot a McDonald’s in two seconds flat and I would probably win in a presidential election. Just know that my talents lie elsewhere.

jadeameliabadwi saloon lass 💙