itsyourbuddy - Tumblr blog

itsyourbuddy · 5 months

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I can't really suffer what i am going through.

I am traumatized, and if i tell you,

You will be too.

I don't actually know what's happening all over ,

I just want to go back and want to have a cousins sleepover.

There was a time i love rain and mud ,

but now i am covering the sound of rain with headphones with full volume up.

Maybe i am a bit overdramatic ,

But the fact that i am still here is a marveletic.

I can't tell what's going into my head , it's just me and my bloody hands.

My body has given up and now nothing hurts ,

Everything is in the pieces and my body with the cuts.

I have everything that i ever wanted but still i wanna go back to that night when everything started ,

Just want to slap me and replace the other one from the present myself.

I just want to write down the story the way i want for myself.

But you had put a stain that will never come off , Even if i rip the cloth with my full strength off.

Now i am still here writing this lines ,

And thinking about all of that with the tears in my eyes.

Maybe i am not the same me from the back of that time.

I have changed and that's nothing to be fine.

I just want to be free living

Not the one always sad-moody and

day-dreaming.

I am the one who want to cry

But now even my eyes does not have enough tears except just to be dry.

Maybe i have cried too much or i didn't even ,

Maybe i scream too much that my lungs have rippen.

That's what everyone says i am here but i am still invisible.

Always making sure that everyone knows my presence to keep it simple.

I have tried all my best and now i can't do more than that ,

Because , I just wanted to be loved and accepted and i can't surrender my life all for that.

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