idyllicdyl
Dylan
Dylan ~ 18 ~ he/him ~ just havin fun
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Me thinking about where to go to college when I want to go to a tougher school but I know I can’t reach my full potential with the way I am now (I can barely get myself to study and my attention span is lacking) so I don’t want to waste the money only to have a mental breakdown and have to drop out of college
#I was gonna say something else but this kind of clears up the issue for me#I’ll just go to the cheaper “easier” school and maybe if my life changes I’ll transfer#Also I get that college sets you up for life or whatever but I’m sure I’ll be fine if I don’t go to the hardest school I can get into#Also I basically have to make the choice today 😐
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reblog if you enjoy napping, being cozy, being conked out, snoozing, wrapping up in blankets, sipping a hot drink, catching some z's, hugging a plushie, or otherwise relaxing and resting
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#Me trying to take a test while my imaginary comfort characters have a meaningful conversation with me#and the same section of a song from the day before keeps replaying#And then I wonder if I have adhd or if I’m just really sleep deprived and my brain doesn’t wanna work anymore
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Watching my toddler figure out how to language is fascinating. Yesterday we were stumped when he kept insisting there was a “Lego winner” behind his bookshelf - it turned out to be a little Lego trophy cup. Not knowing the word for “trophy”, he’d extrapolated a word for “thing you can win”. And then, just now, he held up his empty milk container and said, “Mummy? It’s not rubbish. It’s allowed to be a bottle.” - meaning, effectively, “I want this. Don’t throw it away.” But to an adult ear, there’s something quite lovely about “it’s allowed to be a bottle,” as if we’re acknowledging that the object is entitled to keep its title even in the absence of the original function.
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me today wondering why i was so tired and getting so upset about things (bad grades, choosing a college) then remembering that i only got four hours of sleep the night before
#I often forget how important it is to get enough sleep…#It’s ok i ended up taking a good nap#dyldialogue
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People say “phase” like impermanence means insignificance. Show me a permanent state of the self.
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shuffle your favorite playlist and post the first five songs that come up. then copy/paste this ask to your favorite mutuals <)
YouTube has all my recent favorites so I just went on there and used the first songs that came up
she needs him - Her’s
chandelier - Sia
candy - Doja cat
streets - Doja cat
vampire - Olivia rodrigo
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testosterone hrt things I did or wish I knew:
you WILL need new underwear eventually...butt shapes different...bottom growth...
you will have to eventually stop wearing skinny jeans (at least the ones for women)
the skin itching is worse...buy some products that are against that...for me it was stuff with peppermint, seasalt, chamomile, green tea (accept the acne and save money honestly...)
hair growing in be itchy...especially on the face
my scalp got irritated too for some reason I had to buy different shampoo as well
having to shave your face is annoying
you will have to shower more often
you will have to wash your clothes more often
washing your sheets and PJs more often will be way more effective than any products (I bought a couple of more pillow cases...like cause you press your face into this all night)
bottom growth is awesome but a sensory nightmare...how to wear pants...I bought more sweatpants...
buy a vibrator you gonna need it (especially if you're ace and/or have alot of dysphoria...you don't have to touch your body at all actually...)
it is incredibly annoying at times how horny you get, you will have to emotionally deal with that, especially if you're ace
you will be HUNGRY
your throat will hurt (it feels like having a cold) and singing will not work for a while (that made me sad, I love to sing)
i got some issues with anger....like I gritt my teeth alot...that got worse on T...I got alot of headaches I bought a little scalp massage thingy that helped ALOT (not sure if that's just a me thing tho)
i don't know if that's just a mental thing but cramps got way more painful for me (like they do assume that t does something to how you experience pain...maybe just a me thing tho)
you will want to move your body more
for me the first 2 weeks after a 3 month shot felt like my brain was buzzing in the beginning (maybe just a me thing...very annoying...my mental health wasn't the best tho)
I got a little depressed about having to rely on a doctor so much to like exist
there is a weird phase where you will not know how people read you...public bathroom situation got more uncomfortable for me for a bit....
all worth it tho :)
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Sexy Drug by Falling in Reverse
ATTENTION
If you see this you are OBLIGATED to reblog w/ the song currently stuck in your head :)
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if you told vin diesel fast and the furious you were gay he'd be like "Some people like driving stick…some people like driving automatic…what matters is you cross the finish line.." and then he'd rev up a dodge challenger and drive through a building and kill 16 people
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you: suck my dick
me, an intellectual: inhale my richard
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Hey, so one alternative to testosterone injections I don't see talked about nearly enough is pellets. I see a lot about topical testosterone, but it's not always super viable for a lot of us. I was on the patch for several months and I keep a small stock of patches in case I'm not able to get my pellets on time, but they always gave me horrific rashes and I sweat so much they usually fall off after a couple of hours. And the gel risks being transferred to pets and kids and such.
Pellets do involve needles, but you aren't going to see them. You're usually lying on your stomach while the doctor implants them in your ass or upper thigh. If you have a good doctor, they'll tell you what they're doing or have a distracting conversation depending on what you need.
And they're great if you're like me and remembering your meds is difficult. You go to the doctor once every three months, you then take it easy for a day or two so the incision can heal, and then you just get to forget about it until it's time for another dose. Because it's a steady slow release over the course of a few months, you don't really get peaks and slumps the way you would with other doses (unless you're on the wrong dose or timetable, but that's something you figure out with your doctor through blood tests and the like).
It's not just an alternative to injections, it's just super convenient. And depending on your health insurance, it may be cheaper than other methods too. (I'm on MassHealth, meaning all medications have a $3.75 copay. But because it's an in-office procedure I'm able to waive that copay and get my hormones for free, no questions asked.)
It's also super easy to microdose if that's what you want to do because of the fact that they're a bunch of small-dose pellets rather than a single implant. And there's no removal either - they just dissolve under your skin to release the testosterone.
I feel like more transmascs need to be aware of the multitude of HRT options available to us because we're constantly being told about injections and occasionally gel or patches and that's it.
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theres actually no rules to transitioning and youre allowed to want contradictory things for your transition. it's fine if you only want some of the changes that come with hrt and take preventative measures for the rest (like wanting bottom growth but not body hair or vice versa). you can want to have vagina AND a dick. you can be a woman and want top surgery, or wear a packer. you can be a man and want to have a pussy. you can change your transition goals one or a million times or not have any goals at all and just take things as they come or as they feel right.
there are no rules.
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Was watching a documentary type thing with my parents today and one of the scenes showed an athlete visiting some school thing specifically for autistic children.
The entire time, they were shedding light on how hard it was for the parents living with an autistic child, how exhausting and how shameful it is.
Not ONCE did they acknowledge what it must be like for the child to live with autism. They were offering all this support to the people around them and none for the child whatsoever.
Fuck “autism mums”. Fuck parents who make their child’s diagnoses and issues all about them.
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“If you have time to watch Netflix you have time for a side hustle” my side hustle is relaxing so that my body and brain can heal from by this nose-to-the-grindstone bullshit. I refuse to feel guilty for being a human with the need to relax sometimes. my side hustle is no.
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its unreal how all of my favorite characters have exactly the same traits and hobbies and diagnoses as me
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