Hey! Starting this acc because i’m starting CBT therapy soon and I’m sure I will have smth I will want to say, so yeah. 🙂

Currently I am having mentoring sessions. This week I posted a reel on instagram with the sound “ I had a dream, that some day, I would just fly, fly away” and my mentor freaked out, she asked me if i’m thinking of going somewhere, if I’m thinking of commiting suicide and I answered with “No, im fine” she said that she is really concerned bc she keeps hearing that I wouldn’t mind dying and that I don’t wan to live😣, which is understandable and then I explained to her how I’m feeling, and that i’m just dreaming of doing it, which I think shocked her even more.😅 I have a session with her this friday so we will se how it goes and what we will talk ab.😬

But before her session I also have CBT therapy which will be my first, im really nervous ab how it will go bc its hard to speak truthfully to a stranger and I really hope she won’t weight me. Which I have heard is being done sometimes to patients with ed😖.

On Wellbutrin

Height: 171cm

Sw: 77kg

Cw: 71kg(im just starting, it has been 2 weeks since I relapsed)

Gw 1: 63kg

Gw 2: 53kg

Ugw: 45kg