i just realized all of a sudden that it actually makes sense that she would literally rather make AB a rebound instead of being upfront and just apologizing to me straight up kase she was this innate fucking fear of having to talk to people about what she has to say KASE SHE WOULD RATHER NOT SAY ANYTHING AT ALL AND DEAL W IT HERSELF! THIS IS A EUREKA MOMENT? WHAT?

like no wonder she chose to just not say anything,,, like i really just wasnt worth changing for, like she would genuinely rather end it all instead of having to confront me. WHAT THE FUCK?

i really need to write our methodology

i will FOREVER remember JL as that kid who wore a regular tshirt and jeans to a formal event while everyone else and especially the girls were all freaking out about what to wear 😭😭😭 didnt think id ever see the day it will happen but i must say that he kinda ate us up 😭 gave no fucks whatsoever

i really miss you and its the truth

okay so

sira ;aptop charger ko

my bff wont talk to me anymore

sineen ko sa math gc

andaming reqs

may bagong crush

malapit na magend s.y

exam season approaching

uwing uwi na

pisay u really r doing too much

april 23 2024

everyday i live in adamant hope that something in me, the jokes, the flustered clumsiness, the grins on my face that slip out very easily, the persona that only felt less like it whenever i was around you, would make you change your mind and tell me, with the same adamant hope, that you really did love me and you regret it all and you wish that you had apologized instead. that the love we had, no matter how short it was, changed you enough to realize whenever i wasnt in the room. that my mere absence is so obvious that its almost like im there. that you would admit you still recognize the remnants i leave scattered throughout. that you thought that my prose was actually quite nice. that you miss the outlandish humor and all of those fucking things that made up the girl you chose to left in the first place. that the only thing you regretted about it all wasnt me.

april 23 2024

everyday i live in adamant hope that something in me, the jokes, the flustered clumsiness, the grins on my face that slip out very easily, the persona that only felt less like it whenever i was around you, would make you change your mind and tell me, with the same adamant hope, that you really did love me and you regret it all and you wish that you had apologized instead. that the love we had, no matter how short it was, changed you enough to realize whenever i wasnt in the room. that my mere absence is so obvious that its almost like im there. that you would admit you still recognize the remnants i leave scattered throughout. that you thought that my prose was actually quite nice. that you miss the outlandish humor and all of those fucking things that made up the girl you chose to left in the first place. that the only thing you regretted about it all wasnt me.

tangina sayang di ka nasagasaan nung fam run hahahaha

date unknown

im giggling half heartedly because i remember how much you have hurt me and it just doesnt find its place in my head like the feeling of my hand on your shoulder as we walk and converse loudly. its almost like i want to say, you know what you have done. id have made fun of you for not being able to look me in the eye had i not been reminded that i still write for you. you know what they say about car crashes. 2 cars slide their way across the road and find themselves utterly entwined with each other, and even though by the end of the scenario there is debris and glass and death on the asphalt there is a split moment where they must have touched together like twin flames. there must have been the last moment wherein had it been stopped completely, the tragedy could have been rewound and avoided. 2 cars crash anyway. were still here, and while im scrabbling for a god, a made up figure, an addiction, an inborn hedonist tendency to blame, you walk and converse loudly. 2 cars crash, and one is upside down, while the other still faces god.

ever the eloquent writer

first post, so this is special

"Hateful is the dark-blue sky,

Vaulted o'er the dark-blue sea.

Death is the end of life; ah, why

Should life all labour be?"