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Hajime: My ultimate goal is to punch God in the eye, just to spite him one last time.

Makoto: You know, when Nagito comes over, Hajime can get a little… Kaede: Psycho? Kyoko: Scary? Shuichi: Drunk? Makoto: All three.

Kaede: You have to apologize to them Kokichi. Kokichi: Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!

Shuichi: "I lost a bet." Shuichi: The second-most ominous phrase in existence. Kaede: What's the first? Shuichi: "Let's make a bet."

Shuichi: If you kill me, my teeth only have a 2 drop rate. Hajime: What? Shuichi: Good luck.

Hajime: Whatever happened to the concept of less is more? Nagito: But if less is more, then just think of how much more 'more' will be!

Kaede: We’re going to defeat you with the power of friendship. Kokichi: We’re not friends. Kaede, holding an axe: We’re going to defeat you with the power of incredible violence.

Kyoko: If bees can be fish and boys can be girls, then why can't my dad love me? Byakuya: I thought I was going to have to yell at you, but now I think I should hug you.

Comments under an image of a really hot knife cutting bread Kokichi: Imagine stabbing someone with this knife. Shuichi: It would instantly cauterize the wound, so the person wouldn't bleed, so it's not very useful. Chiaki: if you want information it is Makoto: why would you STAB a person when you can have TOAST?

Makoto: I want a bf. Byakuya: Do you mean best friend, boyfriend or bread feast? Because you’re being really vague here.

Kokichi: Do you know the ABCs of first aid? Chiaki: A. Bone. Coming out of the skin is very bad.

Makoto: You’ve got to learn to love yourself. Nagito: But don't you hate yourself. Makoto: Yeah, but this is about you. Stay focused.

Nagito: I feel like the world would be better if I'd never been born. Kyoko: Aw… that's not true. Kyoko: It'd be exactly the same. Kyoko: You're not important.

Shuichi: Well Kokichi, I have to say, I'm really disappointed. Kokichi: Well, you didn't HAVE to say it. You could've just thought it.

Makoto: Here's two facts about me. Makoto: 1. I hate hot people. Makoto: 2. I'm a hypocrite.

Kaede: Fellas, I gotta know for science. Is the opposite of red green or blue? Makoto: Technically a mix of green and blue? Kaede: So blurple. Makoto: That's implying you're mixing blue and purple. Kaede: Would you rather have fucking bleen? MOTHERFUCKING GRUE? Makoto: You were confusing before but now I'm scared.

Kokichi: I just wanna be called cute 21/7. Shuichi: Why no 24/7? Kokichi: Snack breaks.

Makoto, to Shuichi: If Hajime doesn't say "I'm King of the world" within an hour on that boat, I will give you my next pay check. Hajime, within 5 minutes of getting on the boat: I'M KING OF THE WORLD!!!

Byakuya: And have you learnt anything this Christmas, Shuichi? Shuichi: …Not really. Byakuya: Nothing? Shuichi: Tell you one thing I have learnt—Christmas; ultimately, commercial holiday. Who's the real winner at Christmas? Amazon. they have drones now! Tiny little dystopian slaves delivering iPads and headphones. I ordered a toaster; It was on the doorstep five hours later! Do we need that? It was 4.99! For a toaster! I mean, someone's being exploited there.

Shuichi: Where have you been all day? Hajime: Oh, just dealing with things way beyond my maturity level.

Nagito: Hajime annoyed me today so I told them that I can’t wait to see what they have planned for our special day tomorrow. Kaede: There is nothing special about tomorrow. Nagito: But there is something special about watching the color leave their face as panic takes over.

Shuichi: I’m the smartest, wisest person in this group. Chiaki: Really? Then why is your hand stuck in a vending machine? Shuichi: I paid for my Mars Bar, I’m getting my Mars Bar.

Hajime: WHO THE FUCK- Kaede: Whoa, language! Hajime: I speak fucking English! Kaede: …

Chiaki: I need a long word. Shuichi: T-rex but the long one.

Kyoko: sSSSHIT- I BURNT MY LIP- Kokichi: …Why the fuck would you even drink coffee with a METAL STRAW in the FIRST PLACE?? Kyoko: BECAUSE WE WERE OUT OF THE PLASTIC ONES!

Makoto: :) Hajime: >:( Makoto: Turn that frown upside down! Hajime: ):< Makoto: Not sure what I was expecting…

Makoto: So I can either do something dumb that could very well get me injured or I can listen to Hajime and not do the thing, Makoto: Well there’s a clear right answer here. Makoto: proceeds to throw five packs of mentos into a barrel full of diet coke

Kyoko: Hi, could I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?? Makoto: Microwave for 40 minutes. 😔 Nagito: Why were you microwaving a lemon??? Makoto: I read boiling lemons helps cover up up bad smells (I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges) but I didn't own any pots. Shuichi: Did you burn an orange too? How??? Makoto: Microwave for 40 minutes. 😔

Kaede: Hajime likes to win. When they were 8, a little Club Scout friend of theirs bragged they could sell the most cookies. Kaede: Damned if Hajime didn't walk the neighborhood till they got blisters on their feet, and won by 10 boxes. Kaede: Best part is, Hajime wasn't even a Club Scout.

Nagito: You know, Hajime, when you generalize, you tell general… lies. Hajime: … Hajime: Are you trying to teach me moral lessons through puns.

Nagito: You know, Kokichi, when you generalize, you tell general… lies. Kokichi: … Kokichi: Are you trying to teach me moral lessons through puns.

Hajime: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine. Nagito: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again. Hajime: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?? Nagito: Is it working?

#danganronpa #komahina #naegami #saiouma #hinanami #saimatsu #naegiri #platonic or romantic your choice

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