helioophilee
| H E L I O P H I L E |
twenty-seven | oregon | coffee, travel, food and drinks.
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Do you like shopping alone?
Definitely. It’s oddly a stress relief for me. Most of the time I don’t buy anything. I’ll get off work and go to my favorite stores to walk around and window shop.
Does your best girlfriend have any talents that you don’t?
Yes, she can do mental math. I fucking suck lol.
Have you ever written a song?
Yes, a very very long time ago.
Does anybody send you money in the mail for your birthday?
Sometimes my mom.
What do you think about mullets?
not a fan.
Would you rather date an actor or an athlete?
I think an actor.
Who is your shortest friend?
Ed.
Do you have any scratches on your cell phone?
No, because I have a screen protector.
What grade would you never want to repeat?
None of them.
When was the last time you blushed?
I don’t remember.
Who is one person you met and automatically didn’t like?
No one in particular stands out but there have been a lot and I’m usually spot on about them.
Do you know anybody who has a birthday in November?
Yes! Our friend Joe.
Is there anything you need to buy at the store right now?
Nothing that I NEED.
Do you have any video game systems in your room? Which one(s)?
Xbox
Is it true that you hurt the ones you love the most?
I would say so.
What monster would you be most afraid to have in your closet?
Pennywise
Did you do anything productive today?
I went to work, worked out, did some chores, shower, bed.
How do you usually wear your hair?
Down and curls
What movie coming out do you really want to see?
Frozen 2
Is your skin tone lighter or darker than your Mom’s?
darker
What is the best thing about the beach?
There’s not much about oregon beaches except for scenery but if i were in Hawaii, I would like the heat and swimming.
Have you ever done another person’s make-up?
Never, I don’t know how to do my own.
Do you get snow days off of school/work?
Not exactly. We get more ice than snow. If it does snow, then sometimes we do.
Have you ever spied on your neighbor?
Yes!!
Do you think they’ve ever spied on you?
I hope not.
What color eyes does the last person you kissed have?
brown.
When was the last time it rained?
today.
Honestly, do you double dip?
Who doesn’t!
What color is your birthstone?
ruby
Do you save your old school work?
Yes, some.
What is one thing you don’t like sharing?
My pillow/side of the bed. I like having my own space.
Where on your body would you NEVER get a piercing?
nipples.
Do you ‘dress to impress’?
only when necessary.
Which Adam Sandler movie do you like the most?
Water boy
Who was one of your first celebrity crushes?
Chad Michael Murray
Did your parents ever read stories to you before bed?
No
Would you be considered more of a teacher’s pet or a class clown?
Neither.
Do you have any family members who are mean to you for no reason?
No?
Have you disappointed anybody recently?
I hope not.
Have you ever been hit on through text message?
Yes, from my husband 😂
What color are your nails painted right now?
I have naked nails
Do you have to do any yard work?
I should but my husband usually takes care of it
What’s worse, ignorance or stupidity?
ignorance.
When was the last time you had ice cream? What kind was it?
A couple weeks ago in Hawaii and I think it was Pomelo flavored?
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Do you know that feeling of hiding under the covers? You can’t exactly breathe but you continue to stay underneath because it’s warm and safe. And if you stay long enough, the outside world disappears. It’s just you and your warm, safe bubble that you can’t breathe in.
I like that feeling. And I’m currently doing it—haha.
....
Today wasn’t a bad day but it wasn’t a good day either. I was productive and I accomplished some goals I’ve put off. I’m very proud of myself.
The beginning of the day was rough. I feel hurt because I found out that someone I respect had been bad mouthing about me to others. It’s nothing bad that I’ve done. Long story short, I took over her job and nine months later she criticizes my work because it’s not the way she would do things.
Why can’t people be nice and respectful? I treat others the way I want to be treated. I let things go, “take the high road”, and work really hard to make people feel comfortable to approach me. I understand that I won’t be everyone’s cup of tea but I wish people would be more honest about what they feel instead of hiding it and shit talking later.
I feel exhausted everyday. Mentally, physically, emotionally. I never feel “caught up”. Every time I take a step I feel like I’m pushed back two more steps. I like the position I have but some days I don’t feel like I’m cut out for it. No matter what I accomplish, I feel like it’s not enough.
I hate feeling this way.
....
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I've been alive for twenty-seven years. That's twenty-seven birthdays. 324 months. 1404 weeks. 9,855 days.
No, I'm not very old but time has gone by extremely fast. One minute I'm crying over my first heartbreak thinking "my life is officially over, I'll never be happy again" and the next I'm married with two dogs and a house.
It's funny how life happens. The things I thought were important are miniscule to the things that are important now. I always hated when adults thought they knew better. "How could they? They don't know what I'm feeling, they don't know what I'm going through". Boy, do I laugh now. Since joining the adult club, I fully understand every eye-roll and laughter when I observe high-school kids. So young. So naive. God, was I like that? Yikes.
Beside from laughing at teens who think they're mature, adulthood has taught me a multitude of things:
1) Enjoying a drink after a long day of work is probably one of the most satisfying feelings in the world. And no one will judge you because they're probably doing it too.
2) $100 is not a lot of money. You're not rich.
3) 8:00pm bedtime is real. 6:00am wake-up time is real.
4) Your skin, hair and weight take a dive the older you get. FUCK.
5) Coffee is life. Life without coffee does not exist. Nothing exists.
6) Understanding new technology is harder than I thought. (I want to sincerely apologize to the older generation when I rolled my eyes at you for not understanding how to use T-9, microsoft word, powerpoint, and/or searching something on the internet. My bad.)
7) Going to museums or watching documentaries are fucking fun. Learning is cool.
8) Hand-Eye coordination doesn't exist.
9) Having a savings account and a good credit score is important.
10) You sincerely appreciate your parents and somehow become best friends.
. . . .
Being older has given me perspective and a piece of humble pie. I always thought growing up would be easy, but it's not. We spend a lot of time rushing to grow up or trying to speed up a process that we forget to stop and appreciate the moments we're in.
Life is beautiful. The good, the bad, the hard, the ugly, the fun. All of it is beautiful. We need to soak it all in and take a breather. What’s the rush?
I blinked and I'm twenty-seven. When I blink again, I might be thirty-seven. Who will I be then? What will I have learned? Will I be happy with who I've become?
Regardless of the speed, at some point, we all get there. Why not enjoy the process?
. . . .
To whoever reads this:
Enjoy where you're at in life. Whether you're younger or older, there are so many opportunites and experiences waiting for you. Feel all the emotions. If you feel stuck in a moment, it doesn't dictate the rest of your life. There's always another day, always another moment, always more chances. Take it all in and breathe.
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