Ask Not for Whom the Paw Boops It Boops for Thee

Teeth are bullshit. What do you mean you’re decaying. Get a fucking grip. You’re a bone now act like it. You don’t see my finger bones decaying from jerking it too much now do you

things i’ll not call you a whore for:

sexual activity

how you dress

things i’ll call you a whore for:

stealing my food 

stealing my lemons

my cat likes you more than me

somehow I got 95/20 on an assignment

I hope they never fix it and leave it this way forever

The first funny bitch was Cain, who straight up lied to God after killing his brother.

occasional posts from users

excuse me?????? when did this happen??????

people who try dickwaving about whatever martial art to be some badass and show how they can win in a fight. sure you can make people do flips and break arms or whatever, but pro tip: you can beat any unarmed martial art by running away and throwing rocks at them. just throw a lot of rocks and it beats every martial art. MMA doesnt want you to know this. just run fast and throw rocks

all goofing aside I genuinely don't understand the urge to reimagine Taylor Allison Swift as a secretly queer icon when the pop music scene(TM) is like. literally overflowing with women who actually like women. Gaga and Kesha and Miley and Halsey are right there. Rina Sawayama and Hayley Kiyoko and Rebecca Black and Kehlani and Victoria Monét and Miya Folick if you're willing to get slightly less top 100. Janelle and Demi for them nonbinary takes on liking girls. like what are we doing here. like I'm not even saying you can't enjoy Taylor but why would you hang all your little gay hopes on her.

now that i am a real adult i am starting to realise. media lied to me about the availability of rooftops to go hang out on. every day i wish i could be hanging out on a rooftop somewhere looking cool as fuck

So when Jesus rises from his grave everyone rejoices and it becomes a holiday but when I, Count Dracula-

A pike jumped out of the water likely chasing prey and got stuck in a branch and died. Now, a bird has made a nest in its mouth. One of the most interesting things I’ve seen.