this blog is a mess and that’s the only way to put it
OKAY, so. I’ve been at camp for the last two weeks, although I had access to a laptop and probably should’ve/could’ve gone on here if I wanted to. But I’m finding every time i log in here I’m more and more stressed out. My pages annoy me, my tag system is not fixed, and I have enough threads to drive me up the wall. I join things and then don’t put work in, and I disappear because literally BEING here stresses me out beyond belief.
And I really want to keep playing Newt. I have muse for him, I love writing with everyone I met here. I just can’t stand this blog. So I think it’s time for a do-over, which I’ll be working on probably over the next week or so, but since it’s summer and my schedule is random it could be longer than that or shorter.
I’m just gonna make a new blog for him. Still Newt, still me writing, but I will also be dropping any threads you don’t speak to me about. If you want to continue something after I move, PLEASE come talk to me. I’ll be more than happy to transfer them since I’m just going to archive this blog. but you need to say something once I’ve moved.
To everyone who followed me while I was gone: hi. Sorry for my terrible timing. I have not checked out any new blogs, and won’t until I move; you’re free to refollow me there and I’ll check out your pages. I might reblog this once or twice, but I’ll tag it so it can be blacklisted, or just block it if it annoys you.
And then I’ll log back in here, say I’ve moved, say the url should I change it, and then archive this place. In the meantime, I’ll most likely be on Leo, since that’s where I’ve been lately.
tl;dr this blog is a mess, i’m archiving it and making a new one, I’ll tell y’all when i do.
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Secretly you LOVE this,
do you even wanna go FREE?
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aseventheleader.
Should they? That was a good question
- one he didn’t know the direct answer to. The more people
they ended up telling the more dangerous their whole situation
would get. If people started losing hope, the Glade would start
falling apart at the seams. Everything they’d worked so hard
to keep together would crumble into dust and ash, - and that
would be the end for them.
If they thought they were doomed to live there all their lives
- like wild animals in trapped in a cage - too many people would stop working.
Stop caring.
Stop feeling a will to survive. To fight.
And that was the only thing that mattered in the whole damn
stupid world they’d been thrown into.
F I G H T I N G.
Escaping. Solving what now seemed unsolvable.
It was what they ran for. What they slept for, ate for, breathed for.
“I… Don’t know,” For one of the first times in a long time Minho
was at loss for words. He felt like someone had just ripped out
a large part of him, leaving an empty hole to be filled back up
with nothing but defeat and dread for the future the world held for them.
“Maybe select few people. Keep it on the low down.
Only tell those who need to know and we can trust to keep their
yappers shut,” The keeper huffed out, leaning his elbows on the
table in front of him and putting his face in his hands. “I thought
we were so close… I thought we almost had everythin’ mapped
out with our exit In sight. I thought we were finally gonna get out
of this shuckfaced Maze.”
Were they actually done for?
Newt doesn’t know either. He’s spent all of his life that he can
remember NOT KNOWING, and it feels like a cruel trick from
whoever put them here to have them think they’re so close to
finding something and then landing them back at square one.
W o r s e than square one.
This is ten times worse because they have to keep running,
knowing there isn’t anything new to find, any new progressions
to make. He inhales slowly and tries to get his rising panic under
control, nodding at Minho’s suggestion.
He manages a smile that’s fake, humourless, and doesn’t reach
his eyes. “The world never bloody liked us enough to actually give
us a shucking break.” Another couple deep breathes, and his smile
vanishes completely. His voice is quieter, when he speaks up again,
and sounds a lot closer to how he feels than his previous dry,
sarcastic, remark.
“I thought so, too.”
The maps on the table seem to draw his eyes back again, as
though he needs to check again that they’re right. He suddenly gets
the urge to knock them all off the table, let them blow away in the wind
or get stepped on. That’s how useful they are. He doesn’t; they still
have to act like nothing’s wrong.
“We’re going to have to keep running.” His voice stays the same, quiet,
sad, almost hopeless, and he stares at the maps instead of Minho. “All
day, every day. And then we have to come back and keep going over
the maps.”
Could he even do that? He doesn’t know.
Did it matter? They have to. They have to pretend nothing’s wrong. “And
we can’t slow down, we can’t change anything we’re doing. Everyone’s
too smart, they’ll figure out something’s up if we do.”
He finally looks up, feeling like a ten pound lead weight is on his
chest and he can’t get enough air. “I hate this place.” Not the first
time he’s said it, probably won’t be the last, but the time he’s meant
it the most. “I hate this place and its buggin’ maze and fake sky, and
I hate the shuckin’ newbies every month and the beetle blades and all
the shuckin’ kids we’ve had to bury—” He sucks in a deep breath,
cutting himself off.
They’re just kids. Him, Minho, all the kids out there they have to lie to—
Just kids.
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SAME MUSE X SAME MUSE THINGS I STILL WANT ;;
• younger canon x older canon.
• one is the imaginary friend of the other.
• clones.
• one is the multiple personality of the other.
• twins.
• one is the conscious of the other.
• one from the future sent back in time to help the other.
• one from the past sent to kill their future self.
• one is a specific emotion of the other. such as their ‘happiness’ or their ‘rage’.
• one is the guardian angel of the other.
• one is light, one is dark.
• hero side, villain side.
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medjackisms.
“Building a house, writing a
book, learning how to play the oboe.” Nico,
shrugged and raised both eyebrows as if co-
nsidering those options. He really would rather
do pretty much anything other than go to school.
“I mean, I would also rather be stabbing my thigh
with an ice pick as long as I was far away from here.”
“Hiking. Travelling. Learning another language,” he
added, and then laughed. Perhaps an exaggeration,
but he had to agree with the sentiment. “Me too.” A
sigh. “Unfortunately, we’re stuck here until the final bell.”
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unblunting.
“ yeah— sorry back, i guess. ” she leans down to retrieve
newt’s sword. her’s is MUCH nicer, but she holds back the
comment. “ you should just be careful where you toss this. ”
he takes it back from her, still looking a little sheepish, but
it’s fading. “working on not tossing it at all,” he says, and
smiles. “a sword isn’t exactly my weapon of choice, i’m still
working on the basics.” doesn’t help that it’s not balanced
right either, but it’s a camp sword, not his sword.
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aseventheleader.
“Everyone’s life goal, dude.”
He snickered, nodding in false enthusiasm at the brilliant idea. “Sure, sure. Screw our IMPORTANT jobs an’ all, — let’s build a bubble bath. I sure as hell ain’t goin’ back out into that damn Maze until it’s done. Dibs on first dip, though.”
“—and modest, too.” He’d almost managed to sound mock-impressed, but lost it at the end of his sentence and just laughed instead.
“We’ve had our priorities backwards for too long. Small luxuries are really what we ought to be working towards.” He laughed again, and rolled his eyes. “Better let everyone else know about your dibs, or you’ll get a run for your money.”
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calling the end this semi-hiatus/hiatus thing rn even though i have an exam left because lbr it’s socials, i got it in the bag. and two things. i’ve updated my rules, and the updated bit is at the bottom and it’s easy to spot because it says UPDATED in all caps, and it’s just an obligatory blurb about how i have more than one blog lmao.
game plan: do three replies, at least. then move blogs. rinse, lather, repeat, study for my exam. watch a few more episodes of brooklyn nine-nine. convince myself i don’t need to make a rosa diaz account. go to bed.
draft count is currently 17, plus some stuff replied to while i was on hiatus.
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heads up— this hiatus is almost over, and i’ll be back on tueaday or wednesday bc my exams are nearly over. i’m actually hanging out here and here, because this blog stresses me out even though newt is the strongest muse i have.
so uh, likely when i get back i’ll be dropping a number of threads, most of which will be short ones or unplotted ones. if i drop anything long or plotted i WILL let you know, and then after i’m done cleaning out my blog, i’ll just make a list of who’s still in drafts.
also i’ll read everyone’s blog and do follow backs on like tuesday too. in the meantime, find me at either of the blog above, or skype. coolio, see y’all on the flip side!
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darkipiler:
pullingonthestrings:
i will say this, i wish more people were aware that their is roleplayers who have ADHD
What is ADHD you ask?
It’s Attention deficit disorder
People who have this (symptoms)
Behavioral: excitability, aggression, persistent repetition of words or actions, irritability, lack of restraint, fidgeting, hyperactivity, or impulsivity
Cognitive: short attention span, problem paying attention, difficulty focusing, forgetfulness, or absent-mindedness
Also known as a type of depression/Anxiety
I RARELY see people talk about this roleplayers who have this,
I have it, i found a few years ago that i had it, and i went into a deep depression, i’m still going through said depression.
PLEASE be aware that there is roleplayers that have this, this usually gives us mood swings and we sometimes we forget a lot of things…
please just… remember this
ADHD is Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder & ADD is Attention Deficit Disorder, the difference between them is that with ADHD you are not able to stay still for long periods at a time. Someone who has ADHD has be remain active.
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herfxthersdaughter:
Understanding stirs in her, but
she’ll not let EMPATHY blind her.
❝A pirate ship, a pirate in name,
a friend to pirates– perhaps the
ACTIONS of a pirate??❞
“I’ve got a sneaking suspicion we don’t have
the exact same views on bein’ a pirate.”
Although, they’re probably not far off; he’s not
above violence, which he supposes is what they’re
known for. He’d like to think he’s above cruelty, but
God knows most people think they’re one in the same.
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aseventheleader:
“I know, I know. I’m sure you were dying to get into my fancypants bed, but alas, you’ll have to suffer.” He matched the other’s tone of voice, huffing in amusement.
“Nah, I think we could make one. Dig a trench, throw in some water, good as new, right?”
“It was my life goal,” he mutters dryly.
At the thought of the gladers planning to build a bubble bath ( with a trench as a substitute no less ), he laughs. “Sure. Call a council meeting and get everyone working on it. Nothing to improve morale like getting everyone to work on a bubble bath together.”
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“How do you even cut your teeth on wedding rings?”
this is about to get interesting.
“…”
“S’just a song. And not one exactly one deserving of hard thought about it.”
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Glad to see the guy not immune to the Flare
isn’t the only one with a brain that still WORKS.
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friendly reminder that i’m on semi-hiatus !! also update on life developments: i am tired, stressed, have been in a bad mood for a week straight, and often wander away from my computer/cell phone/etc. with no prior warning simply because i need to move
case in point, pls be patient w/me. i’m not really going to be back on my game until after exams, so until then, my drafts will likely continue to hover around 25ish, and i will continue to be inconsistent in replies, motivation, and speed.
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