glory-dazee
Aye Its Me
Here I post the random stories and things I’m too embarrassed to post anywhere else lmfao enjoy 🤡💀 If you know me and somehow found this account— ahaha no you don’t you saw n o t h i n g and we will not speak of it Sí? Sí. Aha..haha have a nice day 😳
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No because a girl I met in my art class in college NINE MONTHS AGO, whom I immediately was attracted to, has been flirting with me this whole time and I only just realized it when she asked if I was bi 😭 but no it all makes sense now cuz what?? SO MANY SCENARIOS THAT MAKE SENSE NOW.
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No fr bcuz it ruins my day once I step out of the patch of sun and realize it is only in the sunshine that I can know happiness.
a girl does start to feel optimistic in a patch of sun
#there has to be a diagnosis for this#there’s no way this isn’t a mental condition#it literally controls my life#like it’s -97°F outside but hey the sun is shining let’s go for a walk in a tshirt.#oh is that the sun? let’s go to 3 different universities for 47 different degrees and travel the world with my 87 cats and 4 goats#one day i'll get there#and then the sun will go behind a cloud and I will crumble like a nature valley granola bar
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being in yr 20s is abt experiencing the worst thing you can imagine & then having to go to the grocery store
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Don’t get me wrong when I ask my boyfriend for another animal I want him to say yes but god damn i need SOMEONE to hold me back sometimes. This whole both of us wanting a zoo thing is gonna land us in an ACTUAL zoo.
#is my boyfriend broken?#why is he so perfect#why is he just like me in an adopt-every-animal kind of way
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im like if the sleepiest person in the world was awake
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every day i get my heart ripped out & every day i simply just continue
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quote by sue zhao // secrets from a girl (who’s seen it all) - lorde // extremely loud and incredible close by jonathan safran foerk // dear prudence (2010) // don’t know // noggin by john corey whaley // landslide - fleetwood mac // don’t know
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School doesn’t prepare you for life it prepares you for college, and even then college hit me like a train. The train in The Polar Express when it went sliding across the ice. Probably why we watched that movie for every holiday.
#it all comes full circle#it all makes sense now#also remember the caribou standing on the tracks? that’d be me.
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they should make a version of my life where everything didn't go horribly wrong when I was 14
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Made me think is this gem I’ve been hoarding in my screenshots
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Okay but hear me out, what if I just stole my boyfriends family dog and took off to the other side of the world and lived happily ever after with said doggo, touring the world in my tiny car. Just the two of us.
#for legal reasons this is mostly a joke#I don’t intend to steal this dog HOWEVER#it’s tempting#it’s not fair
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*goes to ER because of excessively horrible period symptoms*
ER nurse: we suspect you’re bleeding somewhere and need to do some tests
You don’t say.
the most "fucking, fair enough i guess" response ive ever gotten to something i said was in the ER
me: hi, i need a rabies shot
triage nurse: oh? why's that?
me: i got bitten by a bat
triage nurse: what were you doing that you got bitten by a bat at 3 in the morning?
me: removing a bat from my bedroom
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