whenever i'm trying to talk myself out of buying something i don't need i always hear my old russian professor's voice echoing in my head: "WHAT??? WILL YOU DIE THE RICHEST MAN IN THE GRAVEYARD?" and then i make an unwise financial decision

"What date is the happiest birthday to have?" This and more important discussions are awaiting you in the series premiere of Smartypants, out now on Dropout!

ik Kristen is wearing a heart monitor for athletic reasons but what if she has to track irregular heartbeats due to the consequences of being revived after a stab through the heart

Kipperlilly is an NPC and her whole thing is that she’s upset she isn’t more interesting. She’s literally mad she isn’t a main character. Doomed by the narrative from the start. Doomed by the method of her own creation. Never given a choice to be anything different. Never given any choices at all.

So kipperlily wanted Lucy to change her god, and thats where she lost her on the whole resurrect the rage and conquest god quest. Lucy doesnt want to change her god, so when they all drink the koolaid or rat poison (im theorizing that kipperlilly was the one who organized all of them dying and being resurrected. Poison is just such a rogue thing) Lucy chooses not to be resurrected bc she’s loyal to her original ancestoral god. Then Yolanda badgood wouldn’t change her god either, something we did se buddy do though. Kipperlilly’s weakness has been clerics who wont change their god, and it’s put a wrench in her plans. Kristen, who after identity crisis after identity crisis wont change her god, is not only her rival but hitting her right where it matters.

God I love clerics, fav class

So kipperlily wanted Lucy to change her god, and thats where she lost her on the whole resurrect the rage and conquest god quest. Lucy doesnt want to change her god, so when they all drink the koolaid or rat poison (im theorizing that kipperlilly was the one who organized all of them dying and being resurrected. Poison is just such a rogue thing) Lucy chooses not to be resurrected bc she’s loyal to her original ancestoral god. Then Yolanda badgood wouldn’t change her god either, something we did se buddy do though. Kipperlilly’s weakness has been clerics who wont change their god, and it’s put a wrench in her plans. Kristen, who after identity crisis after identity crisis wont change her god, is not only her rival but hitting her right where it matters.

God I love clerics, fav class

kipperlily is so so so funny my girl does not want to be an npc so BADDDD. what do you MEAN you're jealous you dont have a sad tragic backstory my GIRL

sandra lynn holds the title of messiest bitch and will never ever lose it. whenever someone comes close to claiming the title, all she needs to do is reveal something about her past and I love her for it

hold on did we just skip over eugenia suggesting that riz was short for 'erizabeth' ???

in the words of the great gorgug thistlespring, kipperlilly copperkettle is a "regular freak"

She wants to murder Kristen Applebees

i have an assignment due in about 15 hours - its supposed to be 1,500 words but i have over 3,000 words just in my note outline, and i have to whittle that shit down in half a day. but yknow what i did for the last 2 hours? lucy/kipperlily sleepover art

💥 kofi link in bio if you’re feeling generous 💥

no but if sandralynn dated bobby dawn her taste in men is hysterical cause so far her known dating history is -cleric of sol -literal devil -werewolf with a wild past turned kindly school counselor -gilear

OH MY GOD. I WOULD'VE NEVER GUESSED.

Brennan keeps going back to riz as every prominent adult in his life like PLEASE open up about your trauma PLEASE open up about your trauma PLEASE ope-

He's the greatest wizard of our age...

Some brilliant people on Instagram commented that this fits the "flash of genius" he has now.

Idea submitted to me by Reuben on Instagram. Text post belong to @poppy-pipopapo

Art by @caitmayart as per usual 🥰

sandra lynn’s dating history now includes:

the most red-flag, gaslighting, married guy who became a world renowned insidious televangelist and ruined her perception of love and self-worth

the saddest, wettest, cardboard-box-living, yogurt covered man with an ancient hereditary curse of bad luck

the arch devil of gluttony and living embodiment of insatiable desire and hunger

a former drug addict, high school student councillor, werewolf, who’s probably the most mentally healthy person to ever exist

sexy pirate