[image ID: a light red userbox with white borders. there is big white text of the emoticon ":)" on the left and white text on the right stating, "this user is brimming with insatiable rage and is on the verge of snapping any moment"]

"what did you do with all that anger?"

"i ate it raw, like I was a starving child and it was the only thing that could sustain me."

i am my father's daughter, of course i'm gonna suppress my rage and grief till it bursts and leaves everyone with my ashes

🌅

i’m afraid that one day my anger will overshadow the little love i still have left for the world

Cabbagetober Day 22 - Voice

I loved this manga so much in high school :)

Maybe don't post your aesthetic hospital pics in a medical trauma tag thanks

Ok but why do people always tell me “Theres good doctors!!” when I tell them I have medical trauma linked to doctors

Like obviously I know theres good doctors, that doesn’t mean bad ones haven’t given me trauma ???

I keep getting the advice both directly and indirectly to “ask doctors to write their refusal to test/treat in your chart” but in my experience that just doesn’t fucking work. maybe there’s some recourse for this that I don’t know about but legit WHAT is there to do when they don’t write it in your chart even when you demand for it. when they say they’re going to or avoid confirming that they will. when they write something else entirely. its your word against theirs isn’t it? like who is going to believe the person who is so obviooouuussslllyyyy (sarcasm) making up an illness to begin with?

the doctor should be the crips greatest ally... but he is actually the crips greatest enemy

did you grow up with chronic pain? did you get called sensitive as a kid/teen with chronic pain? were you bombarded with wisecracks from adults who said you won’t know real pain till you get older? join my initiative to ban this vile practice from planet earth!

i had chronic pain as a kid. (still do now.) my physical ability was best in childhood, like, i could do cartwheels then, meanwhile i can’t walk now. but istg my pain was regularly at this very same level back in childhood. ok i have extra symptoms now which make things harder, but if we’re JUST focusing on the pain part, it’s often the same. this blows my mind. the level of pain that i have now, bedbound and with opioids and a million accommodations, is the same level i had when i was 10 when i was just walkin around all day, asking my teachers nicely if i could sit indoors during playtime. (they said no btw.) back then, every time i tried to tell people how much everything hurt, adults said i was “sensitive”.

was i sensitive? is that what i was?

I think i must have been insanely powerful as a 10 year old to be out and about with a level of pain that makes me nonfunctional as an adult. I wonder how many kids and teens are in that amount of pain right now and are being dismissed because of their age. i think the way adults treat children with long term pain is evil. “you don’t know real pain! it only gets worse as you get older! wait till you grow up!!”

okay i waited.

i’m closer to 30 now than i am to 10, and the more hindsight i gain, the more i realise what a horrific violation it is that my pain was ignored when i was the most vulnerable to the trauma of unmanaged pain and had the least frame of reference for what level of agony is normal to experience while climbing stairs

why is it so hard for able bodied people to believe that doctors are sometimes just incompetent? you realize doctors are people, right? people that can be bad at their job. that happens sometimes. they don't know everything because there's a piece of paper on their wall that says they're smart, actually. they can sometimes be wrong, actually. they can sometimes cut corners and take the easy way out, actually. they can sometimes hate their job and make that their patients problem, actually. doctors aren't all saints who do everything right the first time. please stop invalidating disabled people when they complain about their terrible treatment at the hands of medical professionals. please stop putting the feelings of doctors over the lives of their patients.

Credit @ coyotesnout on Instagram

TW: trauma

Some inconvenient trauma responses for when your whumpee is triggered:

Straight up leaving the room/building/area

Throwing things

Passing out/collapsing

Breaking things

Sitting down. Right where they are. On the floor.

Wandering haphazardly. This could be within the room or over a large distance where they could conceivably get lost or too far to get back.

Becoming hyperfunctional