Tumgik
fma03envy · 2 hours
Text
you came back wrong and i am racked with guilt because i cannot bear to see you like this and i should have let you rest. i loved you so much that i defied death itself but i do not think either of us are happy
19K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 21 hours
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
refseek.com
Tumblr media
www.worldcat.org/
Tumblr media
link.springer.com
Tumblr media
http://bioline.org.br/
Tumblr media
repec.org
Tumblr media
science.gov
Tumblr media
pdfdrive.com
281K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 2 days
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Fish men
53K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 3 days
Text
Tumblr media
So,, I finished the painting. Reblogs are welcome and encouraged, reposting is not. Re: do not repost.
Beneath the cut is a list of brushes and techniques that I used, all of which are free:
Brushes used (Clip Studio - ALL FREE):
Main: "rake painter/ oil paint <3" brush by PokiHan, content ID 1853994
Blocking In: "荒筆" brush from gyuukotu's "Fill Set (塗りセット)", content ID 1695210
Sketch: "ラフペン" from gyuukotu's "Fill Set (塗りセット)", content ID 1695210
Techniques used:
3-colors cheat (idk the real name): tint forehead yellow, cheeks nose red, chin gray - bc of blood concentration, works on all skin colors just keep in mind it's a tint
Underpainting: use a complimentary / loud color beneath real color to make real color louder
References used:
Sae Byeok from Squid Game for how light hits this face shape
Nagito's official sprites from Danganronpa for details (i.e jacket stitches)
Time taken:
~15 hours - didn't set a timer since it was meant to be a warmup but ah... it escalated.
18 notes · View notes
fma03envy · 4 days
Text
Tumblr media
google i'm not sure that's true
8K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 4 days
Text
ever since i was little i wanted to become a shapeshifter
262 notes · View notes
fma03envy · 5 days
Text
platforming palestinian joy is just as important as sharing the suffering they're enduring during this genocide. despite continued displacement and bombardment, you cannot steal their joy and spirit. happy birthday to this sweet baby 🖤🇵🇸 may they grow up to see a free palestine
27K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 5 days
Text
DANTE'S THEME MY BELOVED
5 notes · View notes
fma03envy · 5 days
Text
I hate work I should be at the (remembers I don't want to go to the club) the imagination
42K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 5 days
Text
Tumblr media
40K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 5 days
Text
I’m so burnt out from work that this little rat making music has me crying on this fine Friday night
25K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 6 days
Text
Tumblr media
182 notes · View notes
fma03envy · 6 days
Text
Okay, so I’ve been thinking about Sayaka’s character as of late and my mind wandered to the infamous train scene, where Sayaka confronts two sexist young men and, consequently, has darkness consume her.
I’ve always wondered what the purpose of that scene was, exactly; Sayaka’s soulgem was already corrupted pretty much beyond repair before this scene even happened. After her confrontation with Homura, they could’ve just shown her breaking down, having the darkness consume her and then cut to the train stationscene with Kyoko. No reason to bring two random sexist men, whom we never see again and don’t even get the faces of, into such an important scene.
But then it hit me: the fac that these are two random men is what makes this scene so important in the first place.
Sayaka, from the moment she found out that magical girls were a thing, has wanted nothing more than to be a hero. She believed herself to be unimportant in the grand scheme of the universe, unable to even help Kyousuke, and wanted to change that. 
Mami was, on that front, a big inspiration to her. Mami was everything she wanted to be: confident, strong, morally sound, and above all, capable of helping other people. Sayaka put Mami on a pedestal as ‘the perfect hero’, and ever since she became a magica girl, has done her best to copy her. 
Mami, however, is very different from Sayaka for a number of reasons, the most important one here being that Mami is alone. Her family is dead, and to cope with that, she has focussed her life on hunting down witches, which in turn means she has no friends outside of that. As of the show, Madoka and Sayaka might have been the only two people she’d had prolonged positive contract with in years.
In contrast, Sayaka has a healthy social life. She’s been shown to have at least three good friends (Hitomi, Madoka, Kyousuke), her parents, though absent, are alive, and she seems to get along with the rest of her class rather well. When Sayaka died, it was news. When Mami disappeared, no one even noticed.
Mami can’t deal with her loneliness and the guilt she has over her family’s death, so she drowns herself in witch hunting. Protecting the city, defeating witches, is the only thing she considers herself worthy of anymore, or, alternatively, she believes that that is the least she can do to repay the wish she asked Kyuubey for, so she has made this her ‘altruistic’ goal.
This goal, while noble, stems from an incredibly unhealthy mindset that causes Mami to consider herself ifnerior to the lives of the city. However, Sayaka doesn’t know this. Madoka never told Sayaka about the conversation she had with Mami in the Sweet’s Witch’s labyrinth, where Mami admits her loneliness. 
Thus, Sayaka never realizes that protecting the city asked a heavy toll from Mami. Sayaka’s pedestal of Mami is untouched, and she continues to believe that Mami effortlessly defended the city because it was the right thing to do, while also having time for tea afterwards. 
Sayaka believes she needs to live up to this, and every sign of weakness is selfishness. She believes that she is a bad person for allowing the stress of protecting the city to get to her - Mami didn’t. She thinks it’s selfish of her to want to be with Kyousuke, because that’s not what her goal in life is anymore - Mami didn’t need to have friends or even boyfriends in her year. The reveal that her soulgem is now her soul reinforces the idea that she now only exists to protect the city: she is literally made for it now.
Sayaka, because of a combination of self-loathing, unhealthy hero worship, and stressful situation (having your soul ripped out from you will do that), now believes that she needs to abandon all other things in life, so that she can focus on protecting the city from witches.
And she does. She lets Hitomi have Kyousuke, she hunts familiars despite the lack of a reward, she spends all her free time hunting. Unsurprisingly, this does her mental state no good, and it starts to chip away on her sanity.
Then Kyoko happened. Kyoko, the selfish and bitter girl who is so much better than Sayaka. Sayaka tries to beat her time and time again, but fails miserably every time. This breaks her down faster than anything, throwing her weakness in her face and amplifying her self-loathng (’Mami would’ve beaten her by now’), and it also reinforces the idea that she is this city’s last line of defence: after all, all other magical girls are selfish pricks.
Sayaka decides that she needs to focus on becoming stronger so that she can beat Kyoko, and, above all, so that she can beat Kyoko’s selfish attitude and prove that good always trumps evil (yes, Sayaka firmly establishes Kyoko as ‘evil’, even if that mindset does get some nuance later, but I digress). She wants to prove that  she can protect this city, and that Mami was right about their goal in life, and that her sacrifices are worth it, in the end.
At this point, Sayaka has hinged her entir emental health on her belief that protecting the city is her only purpose in life. This is what causes her to spit at Homura’s attempts to save her life (however selfish they may or may not be): she can and will become a selfless hero protecting this glorious city.
Her entire mental health is now dependent on her belief that this city deserves to be protected, and is worth her sacrifices.
And then the train scene happens. Two random men, so generic that they don’t even have a face, sit before her. These are the people she’s trying to save: the average citizen of this city.
And they’re horrible. They are horrible, despicable human beings, worthless wastes of space.
And then, it hits her: these sexist pigs are what I’ve been protecting, this is what Mami died for, this is what I’ve sacrificed so much for. 
And she realizes that her city wasn’t worth Mami’s death, and that it isn’t worth Sayaka’s pain. This isn’t worth her sacrifice.
That’s what pushed her over the edge: the realization that she’d given her life for nothing. That she didn’t want to be a hero, not for this.
Her purpose to be alive crumbled, and what did she have left? She’d pushed away all her friends, her lvoe had left her, her parents are absent, she had been turned into a soulless monster. She could ask no one to love her anymore, and she had no chance for a normal life outside frome this.
So seh gave up, and let herself become the monster that she’d been fighting, and destroyed the city she’d been protecting. 
172 notes · View notes
fma03envy · 7 days
Text
oh shit, it's 3/21/23, 32123, palindrome day
139K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 7 days
Text
died and came back wrong? maybe. died and came back funnier? definitely.
3K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 8 days
Text
Tumblr media
65K notes · View notes
fma03envy · 8 days
Text
I am so blessed that they didn't retain a lot of my spoilery autistic ramblings from before we started watching the show
I have been asked "what is up with the FUCKING maidgirl?" at least 5 times now and the idea of that being someone's main association with Dante is so funny to me
I looooove getting to watch fma with someone who's never seen it before
We just got up to the last opening + ending and their response to those was, "it's so funny how we keep seeing Envy fight Edward in these things when they only fought once and then basically never interacted again. I bet this is all symbolic and nothing like any of what we're seeing actually happens in the show"
And I had to just sit there like. Sure. Maybe. What would I know.
6 notes · View notes