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feralnando · 1 hour

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Formula Skippy

„Once upon a time, there was a SPC Schwarz stationed with the Army in the Balkans. SPC Schwarz was either very clever or very bored; but probably both, since he managed to attempt or be warned about 213 things he wasn’t allowed to do. He collected those things into a hilarious list and posted them to the web. […]

First, a word of intro For those of you that don’t really know Skippy, he’s a friend of mine that, in a sad state of sobriety, decided to join the Army. He’s also one of the Universe’s great agents of Chaos and Discord. Feel free to email him with whatever questions you might have, and don’t be concerned about whether or not he knows you or even if he understands what the hell you’re talking about. I don’t. BTW: Skippy is in Psyops. The first time I met him he was wearing a kilt made of fruit roll-ups. Now, on to the list!“

skippys list x f1

#this is fantastic 😂

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feralnando · 5 hours

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I’m so sorry but I seen the gifs and immediately thought of Kimi and I laughed so much

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feralnando · 5 hours

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Take your punishment

Sexting Mark while he’s on a work trip is all fun and games until he comes home.

Pairings: Mark Webber x Fem!Reader x Fernando Alonso - set in @percervall’s Fuck it Universe

Warnings: it got feral up in here.

Smut, Sexting, oral (m receiving), masturbation, dom!Mark, use of restraints, clothing being ripped off, cuckolding, dirty talk, degradation, fingering, hair pulling, use of ‘Daddy’, P in V, unprotected sex, spanking.

Word count : 1.1k

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“All good?” David Coulthard queries, trying to stifle a laugh. He’d just watched Mark splutter half of his freshly made coffee over himself, the table and his phone - which he quickly slams face down.

“Y-yeah, peachy.. mate..” was the Aussie’s strained reply as he scrambles to wipe up the mess he’d made. He’d only seen the thumbnail of the video Fernando had sent him but that was enough to not only make him wear his coffee, but know that he needed to find some privacy, ASAP.

“Just, uh, need to clean myself up,” Mark mutters, excusing himself to the bathroom in a manner that he hopes wouldn’t inform David of his steadily growing erection.

-

Closing the door behind him, Mark unlocks his phone. Instantly greeted by the image of you on your knees between Fernando’s legs, big doe eyes looking up at the camera as Fernando lazily strokes himself with his free hand.

“Fucking hell,” Mark hisses, using his free hand to unzip his trousers in an attempt to relieve some pressure. Pushing down his boxers, his cock springs free, a bead of precum already forming.

“You gonna show Mark what he’s missing, nena?” He hears Fernando coo from behind the camera, tapping his cock against your lips.

You flash a coy smile, trailing your tongue along the length of the Spaniard's cock before taking it into your mouth completely, the action eliciting a moan from him that makes Mark shudder, now so desperate for release that he’s given up on feeling the shame of having a wank in a bathroom stall of his workplace.

He strokes his cock at the pace you’re servicing Fernando, wishing it was you. The sounds coming from the video alone would be enough to finish him off, but paired with the sight of you - bobbing up and down Fernando’s cock as you maintain eye contact with the camera - it doesn’t take long for him to be biting back a string of curses as he spills over his hand.

‘You’re both getting punished when I’m back home!’ he types once he’s cleaned up and tucked back into his boxers.

-

The punishment, as it turns out, doesn’t feel like much of a punishment to you. Mark having a fistful of your hair as he fucks you into the mattress, would class as a pretty good evening in your books.

Fernando however, is not having a good time, at all.

Within a few minutes of Mark arriving home, Fernando found himself being manhandled to the bedroom.

You find his predicament amusing, until Jenson scoops you up in his arms and you’re following suit.

“Don’t look at me like that doll, I’m just doing as Mark asked,” the Brit shrugs “sounds like you deserve it though,”he adds, playfully nipping at your ear before throwing you over his shoulder.

As soon as you’re deposited into the bedroom, you see that Fernando has already been stripped and unceremoniously dumped onto the wooden chair in the corner.

He starts to protest but the second Mark grabs his jaw and forces eye contact, he quickly rethinks back chatting the older man.

“I was at work!” Mark growls, maintaining his grip on Fernando as he shoots a look over to you, as if reminding you that you’re in trouble too. “You’re lucky David wasn’t sitting closer to me..you want Coulthard to see what’s mine?” You both shake your heads, swallowing thickly. “Didn’t think so,” he huffs, letting go of Fernando’s jaw with a shove and pacing over to the bag he returned home with.

Fernando, quite frankly, can't decide if he’s terrified or more horny than he was to begin with as Mark returns to his side, armed with navy bondage rope.

“You’re gonna stay still and watch me ruin her, got it?” He hisses, pulling Fernando’s wrists behind his back and securing them to the chair.

“M-Mark, is this necessary?” he stammers, tugging against the restraints as Mark moves on to binding his ankles to the chair legs - spreading him wide.

Mark doesn’t dignify this with a response. Instead, once satisfied that he’s fully restricted, he bows his head, licking a long strip up the Spaniard’s cock. A helpless whine escapes him as Mark turns his attention back to you - leaving him painfully hard.

“Get over there and face him,” Mark orders and you’re moving without hesitation, eager to please. You breath hitches as you feel his presence behind you, big hands sliding up and down your body as he toys with the silk of your dress. The tearing sound that follows leaves you dumbfounded as he rips the clothing off of you. “The fuck, Mark!” You gasp as you watch the fabric fall to the floor.

“I’ll buy you another one,” he hums, trailing his fingers across your now bare skin - watching the goosebumps form. You go to protest, but his mouth on your neck stops any coherent thoughts you’re having.

You notice that his voice softens slightly as he asks for your colours. The ragged yet reassuring echo of ‘green’ from both lovers has him picking up the pace as his fingers snake their way lower “she’s so fucking wet, Nando.” He groans.

Fernando whines at the lewd sounds that follow as Mark expertly curls his fingers into you. He’s already rock hard and looking exceptionally pitiful about it. His cock twitching helplessly as he takes in the sight in front of him.

Knowing just how to torture you both, Mark wraps your hair around his fist and tugs, using it to direct your gaze at Fernando.

“Break eye contact with him and I'll edge you till you’re crying, got it?” A shiver runs down your spine and all you can do is moan in reply. That clearly isn't enough for Mark, as you feel his hand strike your ass a second later. “I expect a reply, sweetheart”

“Y-yes, yes Daddy,” the sound that the term rewards you with, is downright sinful.

“That’s my good girl..” he smirks, shoving you down onto the bed as you desperately try to keep your eyes locked on the wide eyed hazel ones staring back at you. You almost falter as he pulls your underwear to the side, teasing you with the tip of his cock.

“You gonna take your punishment like a good little whore?” You would reply to this, but the sensation of him suddenly filling you leaves you devoid of any words and you feel the sharp sting of his hand once more.

“I asked you a question,” Mark all but growls in your ear.

“Yes-.. Yes, Daddy,” you’re quick to correct yourself. You can feel Mark smile against your skin as he murmurs his praise. He presses your back against his front, a hand curling around your throat to make sure you keep your head up and eyes locked on Fernando. Judging by the way the Spaniard is looking at the both of you –eyes glazed over in lust and cock weeping–, you are in for a long night.

Well, here it is! First fic in a long while, so please be kind..

This was the result of the brainrot sessions ™ with @percervall , who helped me out so much with this 🖤 ily Mar!

Feedback on this filth would be greatly appreciated.

#mark webber smut #Fernando Alonso smut #webbonso x reader #mark webber x Fernando Alonso x reader #mark webber x reader #fernando alonso x reader #f1 smut

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feralnando · 9 hours

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Swapping caps

it’s webbonso wednesday so here’s a drawing of nando and mark swapping caps <3

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feralnando · 9 hours

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#hey mar it’s us

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feralnando · 23 hours

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Vampire Castle photography by @nonalimmen

#the vibesssss

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feralnando · 23 hours

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I’M YOUR NUMBER ONE !!

(please do not repost my art to any platform!)

IM SOO EXCITED ABT THIS ONEEEE

tag list!!!! (HII) lmk if you want to be added or removed!!

@97leclrc @ineedassistance28 @beebeebee2224 @sheshelerclerc @mclarenyaoi @toppamplemousse

#I’m obsessed with this

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feralnando · 24 hours

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Reblog this to give the person you reblogged from a heart shaped cookie

#it has fancy frosting too 😘

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feralnando · 24 hours

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Gonna be uploading some Webbonso x reader smut soon that was the result of mine and @percervall ‘s brain rot sessions 👀

#Mar and I cooked #webbonso x reader #Webbonso #Fernando Alonso smut #mark webber smut #Fernando Alonso x reader #Mark Webber x reader

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feralnando · 1 day

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i'll cross that bridge when i cum on it or whatever

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feralnando · 1 day

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meanwhile, in other news…

#I’ve never seen that gif before?!?#fuck me stupid #papi

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feralnando · 1 day

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there HAS to be a reason for this

#love it love it love it

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feralnando · 1 day

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'why r you smiling at your phone' cool girls from tumblr interacting with me mind ur business

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feralnando · 1 day

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is was and always will be unhinged

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feralnando · 1 day

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First you procrastinate on the task because it is not a big enough deal to get done urgently. Then you procrastinate on the task because it has become such a big deal that doing it is overwhelming. You would think that this implies a middle point where it is just big enough of a deal to get done easily, however the inherent perversity of the universe's causal geometry prevents this

#🥲

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feralnando · 1 day

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aint no condoms in my wallet girl those are ramen noodle flavor packets

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feralnando · 2 days

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