fauvester
a strange but otherwise harmless act of hoo-ha
come to the senate floor in 1838 if you want an ass kicking (she/her)
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432oneness
432oneness
bozobustingboy
馃馃悕
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Kiibs
afiqzalhasmi
FREAKINGOUT !!!
born-to-riot
At Exy Practice
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shout out to shen qingqiu for being the most controversial mxtx lead despite also being the only one who isn't a serial killer.
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done with being the bigger person im about to start cleaving bitches in twain
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>at feminism conference
>first male speaker in event's 50 year history
>great and terrible honor
>nervous
>get on stage
>40,000 people staring at me in silence
>all girls
>nervous
>introduce myself
>silence
>shakily bring up first slide of PowerPoint
>"things that I think women like, based on listening to women for 30 years"
>silence
>could hear a pin drop
>somewhere in the crowd a gun is cocked
>deep breath
>next slide
>"Whip-Its"
>deafening silence
>oh god
>I'm done for
>it's so over
>suddenly
>a slow clap
>slow clap builds to a few dozen claps
>few dozen builds to hundreds
>thunderous applause from all 40,000 women
>"finally!" they say
>oh shit
>tenative confidence
>next slide
>"Video games"
>applause continues
>women are stomping their feet
>hooting
>hollering
>next slide
>"treats sometimes"
>cheering
>whistles
>crowd of women chanting
>next slide
>"end of presentation. thank you for listening"
>women applaud me off stage
>pass the upcoming presenter back stage
>is a woman who is going to do magic tricks with a lion
>"thanks for getting them warmed up rookie"
>oh fuck do women like magic tricks
>magician goes on stage
>the women fucking love the magic tricks with a lion
>every day I learn more about women
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unfortunately a lot of the corny self help advice turns out to be true but the thing is you have to come to those conclusions yourself otherwise it just sounds dismissive and dumb
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looove baseball. when my team is winning
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Frankly some of you should be hornier over weirder shit. The fear of being too genuine is the enemy of art. Be a bit of a pervert. It's good for the health. Doesn't have to be a sexual thing just own up to being a bit obsessed in some cringe shit it's fine.
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here's something stupid: the catcatfish
some quick facts:
they're nocturnal and tend to roam around while awake.
they have keen senses of smell and hearing, but terrible eyesight. despite this, they also have a tapetum lucidum, making their pupils "glow" in the dark.
their fur is short, dense, and oily to waterproof them.
they prefer a diet of mostly meat and are attracted to strong-smelling food like fish, cheese, and anything fermented.
the elongated dewclaw on each front paw is sharp, flexible, and nonretractable. it injects a venom that causes respiratory failure and cardiac arrest in prey and, in extreme doses, humans. veterenarians typically remove the dewclaw venom glands during the neuter/spay procedure.
they grow to an average of 1m and 23kg (3ft and 50lb) but can reach up to double that length and triple the weight!
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there's a post on my dash equating "criticizing people for writing porn about children" with "legally banning writing porn about children" and it's like. so stupid it's embarrassing
by and large people are not agitating for the government to enact laws banning you from writing morally and ethically reprehensible fanfiction
but no one is obligated to platform it and no one is obligated to be nice to you about your decision to write it
hope this helps
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reading gideon the ninth... i can tell why some people would for real not like the prose.... I can dig it
#i wish i could go in and edit like 2% of it. for the cringe#but im really enjoying a lot of it!#i like gideon as a pov shes aight
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the prince thanks you for your kind gift!
tcgfau henry clay three ways
#regardless of how he acquired it!#hi. i have a problem. its called being addicted to drawing ghost king hc in profile looking menacing#SHHH... I WAS TRYING SOMETHING NEW LEMME COOK#every time i draw him i will add new jewelry#jackson seeing him every few hundred years like ugh. and heres the ghostly lightning rod#i can hear you janglin from the next town over#'i was going to say the same thing about your retained bullets ~general~'#lots of spiritual weapons and also stolen ashes
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ak-47 knocked my fork out of my bowl of rice while i was talking on the phone to a doctor. she did it again while i was typing this post
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I must not kill myself killing myself is the myself killer . Dune
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Manslaughter sounds like it should be a way worse crime than murder. You didn鈥檛 just kill that guy you slaughtered him like the hog. It鈥檚 like if there was a even less-punished version of jaywalking called traffic massacre
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