exxos-von-steamboldt
The Intergalactic House of Pancakes
I am everywhere, anywhere, and nowhere. The Alpha and the Potato. I am the one who dwells in the rectum of time and laughs back at you in the darkness for forgetting how to set the timers on small electronics. I am like five batmans, or shall I say batmanæ? I am that mixed with Chuck Norris and a narwhal; a fact you find strangely stimulating to senses you did not know you had! For I am High Admiral Exxos von Steamboldt of the Intergalactic House of Pancakes! Bringer of darkness when it is already dark out! And facilitator of squirrel dancing!
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Going absolutely buckwild over this screenshot I found
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I have a theory that the reason we keep seeing so many stories about female teachers sexually abusing male students is because we're witnessing a sort of... personnel plateu in the field of teaching. The POSIWID result of the current education system, if you will.
Education these days is a field absolutely dominated by women, arguably in part because the modern education system is tailored towards female learning methods and not male ones. This has been a hot debate for a while now as people have been asking why male test scores have been dropping so much compared to female scores which have been doing very well. But, not what I'm focusing on right now.
There's an old stereotype about some men who were popular jocks in high school, who peaked there mentally and emotionally and spend the rest of their life trying to relive and recapture those glory days- where they received lots of praise from their friends and family for being a good athlete, also lots of positive attention from female classmates. Hence we find all of these older dudes who still wear their varsity jackets and constantly try to pick-up younger, high school aged women.
How does this relate? Some women do so well while they're in school and get such positive feedback for doing well, that they are drawn to the field of education as a career- which makes sense, if you're a good student why wouldn't you make a great teacher? If you're a great highschool athlete, why wouldn't you make a great real world athlete?
I believe the "female teacher sexually abuses younger male student" is a rough equivalent to the washed out highschool jock. You're taking an individual who has never known more praise than when they were participating in this system, giving them an authoritative roll in this system, and then they immediately start trying to relive the days when they were praised constantly, including seeking attention from highschool aged males to make up for the lack of attention they are receiving elsewhere.
The solution to all of this? Simpler than you think- ban public schools.
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if i were a woman, i would tweet “ginger snapped so jennifer could body”, but i’m not a woman, and i don’t use twitter, and i haven’t seen jennifer’s body, and i don’t make a lot of money or have a car or look nice
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“White people have no culture” said the rootless urbanite who has rejected every tradition his family had.
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elon musk had a third child with grimes that he kept secret until the release of his biography. he named it techno mechanicus
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at a lesbian bar wearing a vampire costume: I vish to eat your puvsy *my plastic fangs slip out of my mouth and into someone’s drink* *I cry and pull the fire alarm before running out*
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the evolution here is also a solid contender for meme of the year 2019
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Excuse me while I sneeze 30 times in a row…
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jokes that will literally never not be funny to me:
saying “speedrun strats” every time you fuck up
saying “first try” when you’ve tried the thing like 15 times, minimum
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