If it seems I’ve moved on in my life I promise you I haven’t

Even as tidal waves of successful aspirations reach my doorstep

My days would be full of wondering ... what if?

So even when you gaze into my door step

Piercing your light into the shadows of my mind

Like the ashes of a midnight cigarette

Guiding the lost souls home

The word “I miss you “ should’ve faintly been said

Three years and it still feels empty in this bed

It’s been awhile since we laughed together like that on the phone in a long time

Reminded me how much I loved making you laugh.

Reminds me how much I really still love you.

I doubt you’ll ever see my eyes the same again

That’s ok

Atleast I’m here standing

You dont really close the door on someone you love

You just stop asking them to walk thru

There are many things I didnt know

I didnt know how it felt with you gone

I didnt know what total loss felt like

I didnt know that the scent of you would haunt my mind

I didnt know

I didnt know the thought of you with some one would still hurt

I didnt know the weight you were under when you said you were mine

I didnt know all the warning signs where here until you left

I didnt know a shadow could feel so heavy is the absence of light

I didnt know the day would come but it did

I failed many times..

But i know this

I loved you

D.k

Dear Fox

Sometimes the people you love the most can’t return that same level of love maybe it’s because they “ran out of it” but is love something you truly can run out of? Does love change depending on circumstance can we even call that love? If the love we had for each other runs out did we truly understand the love that was meant to grow between us? Complex problems often seem to need a complex solution but what if it’s simply this “we never loved each other from the start”. They often say time is irrelevant or the universe works in mysterious ways but in reality we human love in more simpler ways than that. We love through actions and so we must unlove through actions as well. The more we love something that is truly good for us the more positive growth come flourishing out of it. As we love things that are not truly good for us we start to gather negativity around us as if life is trying to put a barrier around us for “protection” from the self harm of that love.

Maybe you’ll never love me the way I love you. That’s ok I still love you the same.

Maybe you “ran out of love “ for me that’s ok I still love you the same

My love is not dependent on you’re actions nor is my actions dependent on your love

Maybe one day you’ll understand my love maybe you won’t

But one things forsure

I will always love you

Love the Rabbit

I tell everyone I’m over it already, but the truth is.. I can’t stop thinking about you.

"At this moment, In some other alternate reality, I'm telling you that I have a love for you so great that I can't imagine the heartache I must be feeling in some other life where we are not together."

- This life.

“Perhaps the saddest thing of all, is maybe you didn’t really hurt me by leaving. Maybe you protected me the only way you knew how, because I would have taken whatever you gave me. So you left, and you protected me from myself”

— Excerpt from a Book I’ll Never Write, Perhaps the Saddest Thing

You can’t break someone who is already broken. But what you can do is add to their pain. So thank you for being that person. You only broke me more than I thought you would, and more than anyone else ever has.

the hardest thing i had to do this year was not to remember you as the person who loved me in ways no one else ever had before but to remember you as the person who left me broken in ways i didn’t think i could break.

it doesn’t matter how you loved me, it matters how you left me.

im getting scared again

23-11-2019, Goodbye