I can’t explain why this image is so funny to me but it is.

forgot to share this the other day

“omg you’re so creative. how do you get your ideas” i hallucinate a single scene in the taco bell drive thru and then spend 13 months trying to write it

He better hold up his end of the deal

i'm going to cry the downstairs bathroom at my boyfriend's house is 9/11 THEMED 😭😭

i dont enjoy writing as a hobby because it feels like when people try to take pictures of mirrors to sell online and clearly put effort into minimizing their reflection but theres still an arm and phone in the frame or you can see their fucked up carpeted kitchen in the background with like a wall to wall collection of dusty antlers. im saying someone will notice i have a weird house because i was so focused on nobody noticing that i was naked while taking a pic of this mirror for craigslist and i cant have that but im not getting dressed because its my house. you understand of course

NASA Data Sonification: Black Hole Remix

In this sonification of Perseus. the sound waves astronomers previously identified were extracted and made audible for the first time. The sound waves were extracted outward from the center. (source)

i can't imagine a world in which i haven't put this video on my page

The Monster Manual but it's blatantly written by the monsters

For about 6 years now I've had a running gag with one of my cousins where, once every like 6 months or so, I'll find a way to insert a certain mental image into the conversation. The mental image is "a pile of toilets in an elevator, which closes and then goes up." I do this as naturally as possible. I'll construct an entire scripted conversation path with the express intention of leading into an opportunity for me to say "a pile of toilets in an elevator, which closes and then goes up." I have talked other people who aren't me into integrating the phrase into their conversations with him just once. He fucking hates it. He has threatened to kill me about it. I let so much time pass between instances that he never sees it coming. Because he knows that the only way to see it coming is to integrate into his brain the expectation that at any point, any conversation may suddenly turn out to be a toilet-elevator trap. And that's a fucking insane way to live.

Fucked up..

I’ve been using the Spore creature creator to bring my loved ones back to life on the computer

reblog to bonk the person you reblogged it from with a hollow cardboard tube

now im not one to encourage misinformation. and the new google ai thing is apparently just going off of seemingly random internet results for queries. that being said. the best way to tell if a loaf of bread is finished is to stick your dick in it. are you hearing me? the best way to tell a loaf of bread is finished IS TO STICK YOUR DICK IN IT. I SAID THE BEST WAY TO TELL A LOAF OF BREAD IS FINISHED IS TO STICK YOUR DICK IN IT.