“Are you ready to order now, dear?” Wide brown orbs shot up from the empty plate in front of her to the young server beside her, the expression on her face matching the annoyed tone. “Oh, my date’s still on the way,” Riley forced a charming smile on her lips, chin nodding in the direction of the vacant seat opposite her. “Just... more breadsticks, thanks.” A subtle eyeroll from the waitress sent her off to retrieve more breadsticks, leaving Riley to quickly dig into her purse to retrieve her iPhone. A scroll down her recent text messages displayed the copied-and-pasted message of ‘FREE DINNER. SAVE ME.’ and an address to multiple contacts, none of which had responded by now. Riley sighed, thrusting herself back into her seat as she chucked the phone back into her purse. 

After realizing that her date had stood her up over fifteen minutes ago, the woman could have saved faced by simply picking up and leaving with her dignity. Yet Riley felt that she was too far in the game to give up now. As subtly as possible, her eyes turned upwards from the table cloth to glance at either side of her. 

The waitress’ frequent returns and Riley’s constant rebuffs were enough to warrant pitiful stares from the surrounding tables, old folks and young looking at her with eyes that clearly read, ‘Poor girl.’ Riley picked up the glass of wine in front of her—her third since her arrival—and took several hard gulps of its contents, fingers drumming on the table’s edge anxiously. 

tattoocdskvlls:

          He was honestly thankful that she didn’t push the subject. He might have ended up snapping at her if she did, and that wasn’t something he wanted to do. “Not everyone, yeesh. What am I, some kinda fuckin’ floozy?” He mused, rolling his eyes. “Jus’ fer the special ones, I guess. ‘Sides, ain’t like you find a guy that enjoys gettin’ down ‘n’ dirty as much as I do.”

Riley tossed the palms of her hands up in defense with a chuckle. “Hey, your words, not mine. Who anyone chooses to suck or fuck in their free time ain’t any of my business.” Her hands dropped to her sides, absentmindedly swinging the brown paper bag back and forth. “Besides, I’d never call you a floozy. Nah, I’m thinkin’ more of a...” She paused, eyes glancing towards the sky. 

“Man of the World. Just a nicer way of saying ‘slut’ an’ all, but...” Riley’s shoulders carelessly rose and fell. “But on the behalf of all women who appreciate men that don’t just go down for two seconds and give five half-assed licks to speed up the process of getting their dick sucked,” the woman took a half-step backward, raising her hand to her brow in a military salute, “I salute you.”

dilldexter:

“Don’t laugh,” he said, as he held the tampon in one of his nostrils to stop the bleeding. “The lady was kind enough to give hers to me. And before you ask, it’s brand new. But It’s surprisingly effective. That Amanda Bynes movie was onto something, lemme tell you.” 

“She happen to give you another one?” Riley slid into the booth, clutching the plate of truffle fries that she plopped on the table between the pair. She paused, soaking in  Dill’s ridiculous appearance while beheading a fry with her teeth. The woman couldn’t help but smirk as she confessed, “Looks like you and me are running on the same cycle.”

tattoocdskvlls:

          With a sigh he flicked away the spent cigarette and leaned his head back against the brick. “Like I said, man, it’s jus’ been…rough lately.” He wasn’t too keen on going into details, not because he didn’t want to tell her specifically, but because he didn’t want to tell anyone in general. It was difficult for him to get to that point with anyone. “I’ll make it up t’ya, promise. Maybe with a little birthday head, s’up t’you.”

After a sigh like that, Riley knew better than to press on with any jibes about his recent absence. Sighs like that held weight and didn’t need further explanation. And so, Riley dropped it. “So that’s your signature? Instead of birthday gifts, you just go down on people?”

tattoocdskvlls:

          Gaze flickered down to the finger that dug into his shirt, brow raised at the female, the corner of pale lips curling upward in a smirk. “Not gonna lie, dollface, I tend ta lose interest after a while if I feel like I’m jus’ gettin’ jerked around.” He teased, taking another drag from his cigarette. “I’m like a shark, babe. If there’s blood in the water, best believe I’m gonna bite.”

“Good thing I don’t swim then, yeah?” Riley’s dark brows raised, the grin tugging at the corner of her mouth as she shifted the weight from one foot to the next. “Anyway, Hammerhead, I hauled my ass all the way out from North End for three things.” Three fingers wriggled in front of her face, each one independently as she counted them. “One, to make sure you’re not dead. Two, to deliver this delicious fucking lunch of I-Don’t-Know-What-It-Is. And three, to beat the shit outta you for leaving me to watch those goddamn youtube cat videos on my birthday. ”

tattoocdskvlls:

          “You flatter me, really. I’m jus’ havin’ a hard time believin’ it is all. Maybe if ya, I dunno, showed yer love fer me every now ‘n’ again I’d be more convinced.” He’d leave it up to her to decide if that was flirting or just an innocent request. It could go either way, really. “Nah, nah, I’ve jus’ been feelin’ real reclusive lately I guess. Jus’ one’a those weeks, I guess.” He shrugged his shoulders.

“Nah, there’s no fun in that. I gotta give you my adoration in small doses, then wean you off of it for a long period of time. It makes for a better high the next time around.” Grinning, the woman playfully prodded his chest with her index finger. "Y’had me worried for a second there. I thought you finally realized I was an old lady and fucked off."

paige---brooks:

Paige tried not to show how much they were smiling when Riley flashed them and they dipped their head to hide it. “You? A gentleman? That sounds extremely boring if I’m being honest.” They rolled their eyes and sighed as they walked further inside and shrugged off their jacket. “You’re such a pain in my ass, honestly, and not the good kind.” Despite how annoyed they were appearing, it was all really fueled by worry. Riley didn’t seem like the type to ghost on someone, let alone on Paige. A few days before they had been in bed laughing at a Golden Girls marathon and the next Paige could barely get the girl on the phone. 

They reminded themself that they didn’t exactly know what had gone on and they had to at least give Riley the benefit of the doubt. So after letting out a deep breath, Paige walked over to her and slid their arms around her from behind and pulled her close. “Look, not to get all mushy but if you need something, I’m here for you.” Their voice was soft in Riley’s ear before they pressed a small kiss to her neck, lingering for a moment before dropping their arms and walking further into the apartment and falling back on the couch. “So have you caught the serial masturbator in your movie theater yet or has the saga continued?”

“Mhmm,” Riley gently responded, not quite letting it be known that she appreciated Paige’s show of concern but still acknowledging their gesture. Hell, it was a miracle alone that she’d been attending the Addicts Anonymous meetings after her father passed. Yet when it came to expressing anything that made her feel as if she was too much in need, Riley refrained from exposing that. She felt security in bottling it up and tucking it somewhere far, far away. “By the way, never heard you complainin’ about me and your ass before though,” Riley cheekily responded, seizing the opportunity to reach around and give them a nice slap on the ass before Paige slipped away. 

The mention of her arch nemesis immediately got Riley all huffy. “I’ve got ‘im narrowed down.” Riley strolled over to the couch, jumping over it from behind to land beside Paige with a firm ‘plop’. “He’s changed his viewing schedule. Now it’s the midnight showing, some time at the end of the month. I haven’t caught him yet though. I swear, he’s got his cums down to a science, that sneaky fuck.” Riley shook her head, resting the beers down on the table before cracking one open. Taking a quick sip, she handed it over to Paige and popped another open for herself. “Honestly, I could give two shits if he jerks off if no one is around, y’know? Just have the decency to not cum on the floor.” 

tattoocdskvlls:

          “First of all, how fuckin’ dare you.” He began, pointing a finger at her while also holding his cigarette as best as he could. “Here I was thinkin’ I was hot enough fer ya t’stare at. Silly fuckin’ me, I guess.” He paused to take a drag from his cigarette. “Second, I guess I’m willin’ ta overlook this betrayal, but only ‘cause you brought me food.”

“These eyes might stray, but you know this heart only beats for you, you beautiful bitch.”

She grinned as she tucked the paper bag under her arm to dramatically clutch a hand over her heart, a faux dreamy expression crossing her features. Snickering, she casually slipped Brennan’s cigarette from his possession to take a drag for herself before plucking it back between his lips. “So what’s the deal, man? You dodgin’ me or are you just getting laid all the time that you haven’t picked up my calls? ‘Cause if I have to start hunting you down at work, that’s gonna be a reaaaal pain in my ass.”

paige---brooks:

If Paige was honest with themselves, they were nervous about seeing RIley again. The girl had quickly become someone they enjoyed spending time with, making jokes about other people with. and when that was suddenly pulled away out of nowhere they had definitely felt some way about it. Paige was always clear with the people they were with. Clear about intentions and wants and. needs and it was all in an effort to avoid hurt even though they knew that was virtually impossible. People got hurt with even the best intentions. But being a sometimes believer in second chances and a Redd Foxx fan had brought Paige to Riley’s door with a six pack and the constant refrain in their head to be careful but to be understanding. Paige pushed open the door and pulled off their sunglasses, sighing as they walked inside. “I’m a little offended you didn’t greet me at the door naked or something, it’s the least I. deserve, really.”

@douchebagdonovan

One foot perched on the coffee table beside a box of pizza, Riley mindlessly clicked to distract herself from the dreaded waiting period when the twisting of the doorknob caused her to perk up instantly. Riley slipped off the couch to linger near the entrance at the same moment that Paige strolled into the room.  The last two months had wreaked havoc on her life and it was difficult for Riley not to admit how much of a sight for sore eyes that face was. Still, the face held nothing short of a disappointed expression and rather than focus on that, she chose to smirk at their comment instead. "Oh, my fault.” Riley reached downwards, grasping the hem of her shirt and raising it over her chest to flash her breasts at the other person. “Better?” Riley dropped her shirt and headed to the door, double bolting the top and bottom locks. Of course, her roommates would have some difficulty getting inside once they got home, but Riley figured that she would cross that bridge when she got there. "The one time I try to be a perfect gentleman and I get scolded like this?” 

The woman whirled around, taking a few steps closer to Paige to steal the six pack from their fingers. A sneaky grin rested on her lips. 

“By the way, the Sanford and Son marathon ended ten minutes ago. Surprise.”

Paige: Damn it.

Paige: I should have never told you about my love for sanford and son. Redd Foxx is just too fucking funny.

Paige: Ugh fine, okay, I'm coming over. I'm bringing Beer. You order food.

Riley: i know a thing or two about you

Riley: shit, i'm not in that place downtown anymore. i'm out in north end now. i'll txt the address.

Riley: hope you're not in the mood for chinese because i puked my weight in egg rolls the other night and i can't go through that again.

Paige: You not being able to get up on all of this again.

Paige: I just don't like being discarded. I mean shit, I wasn't trying to be in anything serious but I don't like feeling used. So I'm not gonna put myself in that position again.

Riley: ok look i don't want you to be pissy with me, alright?

Riley: why don't you just

Riley: come over. there's a sanford and son marathon on tv. you can't be mad when red foxx is on tv.

Paige: I know what I do well. I never said it wasn't. I'm just saying, people don't usually leave, they usually come back for more.

Paige: Are you gonna tell me why the hell you disappeared or am I just supposed to move past it?

Riley: what's the consequence of picking the latter?

Riley: because the latter sounds good right about now

Paige: Who pissed in my cereal?? I gave you, in my opinion, one of the best orgasms in your life and then you ghosted on me and I'm supposed to be nice and pleasant when you text me finally?

Paige: Do I look like a fool cause I ain't one.

Riley: really tooting your own sex horn there, ain't ya, paige? because i recall that being a two way street

Riley: if we're playing that game, let me get on my soapbox and scream out everything that YOU'VE screamed at the top of your lungs

Paige: It was about me but it was only once.

Paige: You haven't talked to me in almost two months and the first thing to ask is if I keyed your car? I don't have time for this shit, Riley.

Riley: pretty sure that's what richard ramirez said after he killed someone for the first time too

Riley: jesus fuck, who pissed in your cereal this morning? Riley: it was just a question, not the spanish inquisition