deadwolfpack
Dead Dogs can't Bite
DID system (80+) | Untagged + trauma vents
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lemonade-into-lemons-blog
Turning Lemonade into Lemons since 1989
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And I said "i promise I won't be offended". Like a liar.
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[ID text — i begged God to save me and he shoved more torment down my throat to keep me quiet]
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“Mouthful of Forevers”, Clementine von Radics
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#something in my brain is so broken#its broken and its making me so angry its spilling out of me in waves#but im not angry#im just so scared and upset and traumatised#but I'm so broken that anger is spilling out of me in big sloshing waves
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I learned that all seeing eyes don’t only belong to God
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I actually just don't understand why we hang out with them at all when all they do is make fun of us until we want to go home and then feel bad bc we want to go home
#colt.talks#i actually just fucking hate them sm too i just wish i could cut them out our lives i dont give a fuck if we'd be cutting 3 fp out at once#our life would be so much better without any of them in it theyre actually just so fucking nasty to us#i hate people i hate people i hate everyones so hot and cold with us#why wont anyone treat us like a person why are we always treated like a burden or a freak or a chore#main fronters should have known better than to let us get this co dependent on people who dont even blink twice at us#“we noticed something was up/you were quiet” oh okay but didn’t notice your fucking little digs were upsetting us all afternoon?#i understand we're fucking stupid but why does everyone around us just use us as a warm body why does no one actually care about us#the only person i would even a little want to get to know more the rest of the sys are so scared of upsetting they wont even talk to them#we're actually so fucking pathetic#we deserve everything bad that happened and is going to happen
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#i dont want to go to college#i just want to kill myself#ive been a broken toy for so long and im so sick of trying to fix myself just so others can play with me again#i dont mean to be broken i want others to be able to play with me#i wish i didnt have any friends#they always only say mean things to me#i just want to hide in grampa wilsons room#i just want to hide under the window#silver.talks
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Joseph Brodsky, from The Selected Poems of Joseph Brodsky; "Το Μ.Β.,"
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