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datashade · 5 hours
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Say, youve consumed all sorts of media. Do you know of any non-Fate stories where mythical/historical figures from multiple disparate cultures are summoned out of their times into one place (and possibly fight each other or other things)? Sorry to bother, thanks fer yer time, and for yer help if ya actually know any.
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datashade · 5 hours
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I just had to, it was a desperate need
From this
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datashade · 5 hours
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I'll be honest, my alleged hardware expertise mostly consists of the ability to correctly plug in things which are designed to only fit one way. That this genuinely appears to be a rare skill is a little concerning!
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datashade · 5 hours
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i have so many hobbies and interests but each day the four horsemen (instant gratification, shortened attention span, procrastination, exhaustion) grab me by the throat and shake me until i collapse in my comfy bed
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datashade · 14 hours
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is a game even a soulslike if there isn't at least one creature that vores you?
(With reference to this post here.)
The critical insight to understanding the soulslike genre is that for a specific segment of the core audience, what that giant lobster in Elden Ring does to you is 100% a horny thing, and the developer knows this.
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datashade · 14 hours
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yknow what chilchuck deserved that sex ed talk maybe if someone told him about safe sex earlier he wouldn't of ended up divorced with 3 kids
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datashade · 14 hours
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Saw this robot toilet at the restaurant. Was too scared to pee in it so I pissed adjacent to it on th floor.
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datashade · 14 hours
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datashade · 14 hours
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But like orange cats and brain cells, only one kobold in the prime material plane can have it at any given time
Give kobolds a legendary action
you know what, they deserve it
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datashade · 18 hours
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The computer, which is widely used for playing solitaire[1], calculating large prime numbers[2][3], finding gay hook-ups[4], and organizing political extremism[5][6][7],
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datashade · 18 hours
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datashade · 18 hours
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fixed it
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datashade · 19 hours
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spiders have got to figure out contracting I need to be able to call my local spiders union and be like "hey can you send a guy out for a few days the fruit flies are back" and then pay it in spider currency. I'll learn the conversion rates. I'll be generous with my rounding. please.
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datashade · 19 hours
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Your wife is the ghost of Mitch Hedberg??
this video now
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datashade · 19 hours
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I’ve been fired exactly once in my life. In my early twenties I was working at a pizza place. The pizzas were artisanal, thin crust and personal. They’re a huge chain now but when I first started the company was in its infancy. It was the wild west of management, and the core investors would frequently stop by to check on things. One of these people was this round little man with rage issues. A knock off Danny Devito with no charisma at all.
His favorite thing to do was to come in on a Friday or Saturday night. We'd be at our stations: taking orders, making pizza, manning the oven, finishing orders off, running the cash register. He'd shove his way onto the line and start rearranging people. "You, get off orders and work the cash register, you come over and make the pizzas!" With a line of customers snaking out the door he'd throw off all our grooves and rattle us.
Then, inevitably, a mistake would happen.
When it did he'd call the person over and say, "Hey c'mere. You're fired." Just like that. No inflection, just a flat "You're fired." It was absolutely a power kink, and because of his involvement the average turn over was three months. You were a veteran at five months.
One night there was only three of us manning the front. I took an order than went to the cash register to ring them out before I made the pizza. This horrible man watched that then called me into the back. I didn't know if I was about to be fired. But I wasn't. In fact, he had one other move besides firing people. He yelled.
In the back he absolutely lost his mind screaming at me for being on the cash register. I'm talking veins popping, spit flying, red with rage, this man just started bellowing nonsensically about where I should be and how I was just such a failure. It was truly like his brain had shut off, nothing he was saying even made sense. I stood there in the face of this tirade for a minute and then set a record for being the first person to ever cut him short by bursting into tears.
He instantly stopped yelling and it was like Jekyll and Hyde. He was remorseful and consoling, deeply embarrassed by my display of emotion. All my male coworkers just took the abuse but faced with my weeping he about faced and instantly backed off. I went outside to cry and when I came back in he pretended it had never happened.
That was the state of things. The investors knew they desperately needed to keep this man out of the stores, but they couldn't just give him the boot. They needed to move him aside and fill his position with someone. The store manager was this lovely woman who had hired me on the spot at my interview. The entire staff adored her. She was the best fit to get this roided out investor out of the stores for good.
Her replacement was this man called Anthony. He was instantly loathed by the entire staff. Condescending, critical, and lazy he started off his reign by letting go a core lead who "back talked." He spent a whole morning berating the opening crew because the closing crew (who had sold 100 more pizzas than we were even supposed to have on hand) had forgotten to windex the doors. He left the entire crew to close without him while he flirted with a girl who wasn't his pregnant girlfriend. He hired his roommate to replace the lead he fired and even that guy hated his guts.
Our antipathy toward him made him paranoid and resentful and one by one he started finding excuses to fire the whole staff, certain that if he could clean house he'd be able to do the job. My time came, and he sat me down with his boss, my former manager. She cried as he announced I wasn't personable enough and used too many pepperonis.
I looked at her, the woman who had trained me on how many pepperoni to use, but she said nothing. What could she say? He was the boss now and had determined I was going to be let go regardless. Too many in this case was seven. Seven pepperonis on a personal pizza. The correct number was five according to him, which is one pepperoni per slice, and one in the middle.
I sat there for a moment, taking it in. I smiled at my old manager, obviously miserable. I looked back at him and said, "You're a terrible manager, you're doing the worst imaginable job." I outlined some of the things he'd done so she could hear them, then I stood up and left. I made it to the back room before I started crying.
I found out later through a bus boy that he replaced the whole staff with college kids who had such limited availability that the store couldn't run, then quit three months later leaving the whole place in shambles. Most of the old staff returned, but I'd moved onto the sex shop already and was enjoying a job with significantly less risk of being fired on a whim.
However I do have to disclose on job applications if I've ever been fired. I always says yes and list the reason as, "Excessive use of pepperoni." It has never failed to get a laugh from my interviewer.
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datashade · 19 hours
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datashade · 19 hours
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A random old lady walked up to me and asked if I was autistic. I told her I wasn't sure, and she said, "Would you like to be?"
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