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dass-ist-egal · 11 days

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I feel abandoned and I’m afraid of asking for help.

What if I anger you?

Isabel I loved you, and then we were friends right? But you’re not following me now and I just feel anxious.

Sofia turned her back on me.

So did Flavia.

I wanted to marry Flavia.

I thought the same about Isabel for a while.

I won’t hurt myself but I feel weaker by the day, as people who were important to me leave me.

Please love me, I’m sick of being alone.

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dass-ist-egal · 24 days

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I feel somewhat betrayed.

I loved you.

And you were always kind.

Everybody thought we were dating.

I feel like shit.

God I wanted you to be happy.

I did my best to make you happy.

You were the beginning of my happiness.

All of your messages made my heart feel warm.

I lost the place where I felt happy.

I lost the love of the people that made me feel comfortable.

Now I lost you.

I will not hate you under any circumstances.

But you leaving me alone like this.

Not trying to defend me.

It breaks me somehow.

I could get up after everything that happened but now I just want to cry myself to sleep for a few days.

I feel betrayed.

You said you never failed me but you did, several times.

You constantly broke my heart but I would tell you bc I liked seeing you happy.

Now I cannot speak

I lost my voice

Speechless and redundant

I love you is not enough

I’m lost for words.

#Spotify

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dass-ist-egal · 1 month

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I wish I was your boyfriend but I’m not.

It makes me so sad to think I’m not him.

I could never be one of them.

What am I lacking?

Am I -

It seems like I never posted this.

You just left and it hurts.

It feels like I lost so much.

I love you, I’m sorry.

You made me so happy, I’m sorry I wasn’t the same for you.

I tried my best, I enjoyed your company.

You said you enjoyed mine.

Sorry for being selfish.

You kissed him on my birthday but I just went to a corner and did my own thing.

God, I always wanted to be there for you.

Sorry I wasn’t strong enough.

Sorry I wasn’t what you were looking for.

I did my best the best way I could handle it.

I began baking things just for you.

I wanted to make something that would make you smile.

I’m sorry.

I feel defeated.

Or numb.

You were the begging of my happiness.

The one person that made me smile.

You made me feel like a puppy every second I was beside you.

I wanted to be yours and yours alone.

I’m sorry.

You said I never let you down but I did.

God it breaks my heart.

I lost my place, I’m not comfortable the way I used to feel back at the concert venues.

I lost you.

I wanted to see you more often but you weren’t usually available.

It made me sad to read that and then see you elsewhere with somebody else.

8 billion people in this world.

I want to meet somebody like you.

I want to feel safe again, happy by your side.

Or happy by the side of a person that actually wants me there.

I had a happy birthday last year.

I fear it will not be the same this year.

I love you.

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dass-ist-egal · 2 months

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If you would hug me, perhaps I’d be happier.

I remember feeling miserable and just yearning to see you.

Thinking that your embrace would heal me.

Wishing I could be yours.

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dass-ist-egal · 2 months

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You break my heart but I’ll be fine, I always am.

It’s kinda sad though.

You constantly break it, even though you mean so much to me.

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dass-ist-egal · 2 months

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My uncle makes me unhappy.

I asked him about something and he treated me like garbage.

It was just a question about something he said he'd do.

I only asked him once.

I don't usually harbor strong feelings for people.

For him I desire death though.

He is an asshole.

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dass-ist-egal · 5 months

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When they say they don’t believe I hope that they see you and me.

They’ll he able to see how it didn’t work.

How my efforts were futile.

How I was unable to achieve anything.

Please kill me already.

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dass-ist-egal · 6 months

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Sometimes I feel like I cause nothing but trouble.

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dass-ist-egal · 6 months

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Apparently quite a few people dislike me.

It saddens me.

I wish they would tell me instead of acting like hypocrites, though hearing that constantly would be worse than not hearing it at all.

It’s disappointing.

Am I really that awful?

I stand up again, even though I constantly feel beaten.

I love somebody who doesn’t like me.

If she did she would make the time to see me.

It makes me feel bitter, jealous.

I’m tired of fighting a losing battle.

Part of me wants to lose already.

But I tend to have problems giving up.

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dass-ist-egal · 7 months

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I need more softness in my life.

It’s cold and not very happy atm.

I love you, and I just feel jealous.

I would never tell you, for you owe me nothing.

But seeing you spend so much time with him, makes me feel left behind.

I had a dream where you moved abroad and then came back.

You seemed different after coming back, like you had grown, I said hi and you had me wait, but you left with someone who was more important to you than me, and I was left hanging.

You talked about how everything was so bright there, and I felt like I couldn’t make you happy.

Even right now, I don’t feel like I can make it work.

I’m sad, I used to feel like I was drowning all the time, but then I went out and met a bunch of wonderful people. I’m back to drowning again.

I need somebody to love me.

I really wanted it to be you, and I know for a fact that these horrible feelings won’t leave me until I meet someone new.

I love you, I’m so sorry.

#Spotify

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dass-ist-egal · 7 months

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I just feel heartbroken.

Everything’s back to being gray, and once again I feel like I’m drowning.

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dass-ist-egal · 7 months

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I dreamt that she moved abroad and when she came back she no linger liked me, I was anything but a priority.

Woke up feeling sad.

I’m superficial, appearance matters too much for me, I love you.

You make me feel warm and cozy, thinking about you doesn’t make me feel regret.

Perhaps that’s what draws me towards you.

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dass-ist-egal · 7 months

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I have many wishes, but there is only 1 thing I yearn for.

I'm sorry.

I miss you.

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dass-ist-egal · 7 months

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I feel like kiritsugu emyia in that one fate/zero episode.

“I feel nothing but regret”

I love you, I wish you would feel the same.

You always make me smile, and I wish I could do the same for you.

I’m ill, and have to wait to heal.

That’s problematic.

My ex once asked me if getting a girlfriend wasn’t my goal in life anymore.

My answer was that it’s never stopped being my main goal.

I just want to feel loved by a pretty girl who likes spending time with me as much as I like spending it with her.

I love you but I wish you would friendzone me already.

Part of me feels undeserving.

I need you.

Thank you for being a part of my life.

I… won’t stop until I find someone.

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dass-ist-egal · 7 months

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I wrote this some time ago and I do remember doing it but not when specifically. (I do now), it ended up being a good night.

It’s not that late but today feels like a loss.

Girl I’m interested in isn’t going to a certain place.

A friend is just going with another guy to where we were supposed to meet.

I’m told I show my feelings on my face, and I fear a little that I might seem defeated today.

Kinda lost interest in the whole thing.

Feels like in my birthday when the person who asked me out was late.

I didn’t know how to react.

Just felt like shit.

She ended up arriving but until that happened I just felt like shit.

I’m no longer excited :(

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dass-ist-egal · 8 months

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I seem to wear my expressions in my face.

Oftentimes, it seems difficult to hide my disappointment.

But I’ll get up again.

I always do.

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dass-ist-egal · 8 months

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I never gave up.

But I guess I was annoying.

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