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I still somewhat exist but for the most part, Poe is contained over on my multimuse @cmnis for the sake of simplicity and keeping everything in one place. Eventually Poe will branch back out onto this blog, but for now? He's there .
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THE COMPUTER IS SET UP AND I LIIIIIIVE
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working on moving my computer to a new corner and shuffling animals around the house ( aka the birds have their own bedroom now lol ) and in general trying to scrape everything back together . have a plan for the rest of my life so there's that . how is everyone else ?
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“ one last kiss is worth being late to work for. “
the small twitch of his lips gives way to a full blown smile , one that's warm and adoring as his eyes spark with the joy that seems to just bubble out of him . " you sure about that ? " but even as he asks , Poe's hands are reaching for Ben , pulling him close .
" you might get yelled at for being late . " it's joking in tone , and Poe just buries his face against Ben's neck for a moment , drawing in a long breath . how was it that he had found someone so perfect for himself ? years of shit through INgen and everyone else , the parks , the dinosaurs . fuck , he never thought he'd be the one with a happy ending , or something even close .
he leans his head just enough to brush a kiss over Ben's lips , still smiling against them . " be careful on the way in ? BB has been ... well , hunting . " hundreds of acres of land in the mountains and the one single thing from his previous job , BB , was roaming them now , happily content .
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kissing starters
“ kiss me. ”
“ can't we just... make out, or something? “
“ i really want to kiss you right now. “
“ just one more... “
“ it was more of a peck... “
“ kiss me and you'll find out. “
“ i’m here for business, not pleasure. “
“ so you don’t want me to kiss you? “
“ i could kiss you for hours. “
“ how about a good night kiss? “
“ you may now kiss the bride. “
“ permission to lean in? “ “ permission granted. “
“ we should practice for our wedding day. “
“ you, me, bed, now. “
“ i want [our first kiss] to be special. “
“ i fell asleep before i could kiss you. “
“ we didn't kiss each other good morning. “
“ i’ve been wanting to kiss you for a while. “
“ kiss me, i’m miserable. “
“ who was your first kiss? “
“ did you do the laundry? “ “ yes, now where’s my kiss? “
“ if you want me to kiss you, all you have to do is ask. “
“ you’re a great kisser. “
“ with your mouth on mine, there's less bullshit coming out of it. “
“ teach me how to do it. “
“ can i get another one? “
“ every time you kiss me, i swear i'm falling even more in love with you. “
“ i haven’t mastered the art of kissing yet. “
“ wanna practice? “
“ you’re a great kisser. “
“ kiss the pain away. “
“ with your lips on mine... “
“ is there such a thing as love at first kiss? “
“ if i were to kiss someone, it would be you. “
“ you’re irresistible. ”
“ you said i had nice lips. who says that? “
“ kiss me again, but don’t stop this time. “
“ i love it when you kiss me. “
“ your kisses mean the world to me. “
“ i want you to kiss me. for real, this time. “
“ one last kiss is worth being late to work for. “
“ if you kiss me, we’re not getting out of bed today… “
“ you kissed me last night. “ “ and you didn’t stop me. “
“ no more kisses! i need to get ready for work. “
“ i really want to kiss you. “
“ it’s cute, this thing you’re doing. “ “ being all nervous? “
“ you’ve never kissed anyone before? “
“ you’re going to have to guide me through this. “
“ do i just… close my eyes and lean in? “
“ i want our first kiss to be special. “
“ [our first kiss] it's going to be magical. “
“ i kissed you. “ “ i know, i… was there. “
“ you just can’t help yourself, can you? “
“ i’ve always wondered what it would be like to kiss you. “
“ it’s just an innocent kiss. “
“ we’re friends, right? friends kiss each other all the time. “
“ people kiss each other all the time. doesn’t mean there’s feelings involved. “
“ i’m sorry for bringing it up. “ “ actually, i would love to kiss you. “
“ you mean, you and me? kissing? “
“ you’ve seriously never thought about [us kissing]? “ “ maybe once or twice. “
“ you mean us, kissing? “ “ can’t say it never crossed my mind... “
“ let’s kiss. just to see what it’s like. “
“ oh, what the hell. let’s do it. “
“ of course i'm a little curious. i've heard great things about you. “
“ all i want to do is kiss you. all day, every day. “
“ i’ve never kissed anyone before. “
“ well, if anybody were to kiss me, i would want that person to be you. “
“ you just can’t get enough of me, can you? “
“ and right now, i think you should kiss me. “
“ i’ll kiss you right now to prove i don’t feel something for you. “
“ you kissed me first. “ “ i definitely didn’t. “ “ you were literally all over me. “
“ did you just kiss me? “
“ you’re so full of shit... [if you think the kiss didn't mean something] “
“ did we just kiss? “
“ your kiss already gave you away. “
“ we don't have to do this if you don’t want to. “
“ don’t speak. just kiss me. “
“ come kiss me. “
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me: comes back after aGES
harley: hey remember that post I did
me: harley what the fuck
also me: here have some angst baCK
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greyturned:
NOT MUCH OF THE MAN HE HAD BEEN A LONG time ago stood before the bound pilot now , the last shreds of humanity had been burned away on Starkiller Base with the corpse of a smuggler . behind the void of Ren was not the deep russet hues that had been the last physical trace of the Solo boy , but the sickening yellow of the Sith . he had been reborn that day , in blood and flames like his grandfather before him . Starkiller had fallen , Snoke had fallen , now all that remained was Kaen and the darkness that spread from his fingertips and seeped into every crevice of the galaxy .
they had caught the pilot responsible for leading the assault and destruction of their superweapon , and Kaen wasn’t surprised to learn that it had been HIM . of all pilots , of course he would make that shot . stalking closer to @damrn , his eyes followed the trail of blood that went from his temple to stain his shirt , watched the way he trembled as gloved fingers outstretched and invisible ones dipped into his mind . how familiar this scene was to the both of them . he could feel his anger , his fear , his . . . heartache . curious . when the Sith pressed to get him to confess , his woes were even more intriguing . ❝ i killed someone i love . ❞
tongue clicks following a soft hum , retreating from his mind as his hand retreats from his space . briefly he wonders who he was referring to . instead of lingering too closely on that , his voice rasps against the harsh twist of his mask . ❝ yes , you’re quite good at that . ❞ something tells him to stay away , but his body drifts closer to the pilot . hands reach for either side of the mask , fingers finding the clasps and with a hiss — cool air hits the scar left by a scavenger , which was surrounded by the burn scars left by his world collapsing shot . Kaen had a moment to wonder if Poe even KNEW his secret before his mask dropped to his feet .
❝ there was a boy you once knew , who you killed with your love and your absence . ❞ Kaen murmured , bringing his face level with Dameron’s so he could see the eyes of the man that replaced the boy he once knew , the scars he was partly to blame for . ❝ then there was the ghost of him , who burned away in the crumbling fortress of Starkiller Base . any hope of getting him back went away when you pulled that trigger . ❞ Kaen neglected to mention that that had happened well before Ilum fell , when he had pressed the ignition on his lightsaber . his gaze remains on the rebel’s face as the Sith waits and watches for his reaction . a frown marring scarred features as something twists in his chest . ❝ you promised you wouldn’t leave . . . yet you did . you left Solo , alone , to be ravaged by the monsters of the night . when he needed you the most , where were you ? ❞
what had he been told ? it felt so long ago when he had been on Starkiller , when he had burned through the shields and pulled the triggers to destroy the superweapon and destroy what he could . that he had felt the heat of the guns and the fire under the x - wing . the adrenaline of burning through an entire superweapon and taking out the First Order with a whooping laugh and looking out the transparisteel and seeing Rey and the woods and the Falcon and ---
the echo of the General in his head calling out to him , telling him that he would kill her son if he completed this mission if he kept it up . at first he hadn’t believed it . but his hope and his very faint sensitivity to the Force told him otherwise . somewhere out there , Ben existed . he didn’t know where , but he did . if he kept this up , if he kept pulling stunts like this , he would keep pulling himself away , and he would end up killing Ben . after all these years , he didn’t believe the other dead .
the haunted look rests on his face a moment , and he shakes it off , swallowing the words down .
“ I’m aware of that . ”
hadn’t he gotten the General killed , too ? he winces at the thought , before his gaze is drawn as if magnetically by the sound of the hiss of the mask releasing , and ice drops into his stomach , his entire being locking up , and his breath freezing in his throat and chest . he can’t even draw in air , and every word from the man in front of him feels like a razor filled punch to the gut . searing and sharp . the tears spring sudden , without bidding , and he can’t stop them , and can’t find words .
guilt rises as fast as bile up into his throat , and he feels sharply sick , his head spinning . for a moment , he feels faint , like he’s ready to just drop . “ but -- I didn’t --- Ben --- ” he sucks in a breath , trying to get his head on straight . the tears fall more , and he swallows down hard . “ Ben no . I tried to find you . I tried so hard . ” the binders feel tight , but even if they weren’t on , something would be holding the rebel still regardless . the guilt would weigh him down and hold him in place . the pilot is breaking apart , seams bursting with the weight of sins .
for as much as he had done , he still loves the other man , Sith or not . “ Ben , I still love you , I’m still here for you . I never left you . ” he chokes the words out , but they ring a truth .
#greyturned#god what verse do i even pUT THIS IN#the shEER GUILT POE FEELS#WHAT A POST TO COME BACK TO#I AM SCREAMING
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fun fact; I put a post in tumblr blaze just to see if it would get sponsored and it fUCKIN DID AND I AM WHEEZING
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Send a rumor your muse heard about mine and they will confirm if it's true or not!
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&. 𝐡𝐢𝐭 ‘𝐞𝐦 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.
( more angst to devastate your writing partners. metaphorically. )
❛ you’re a weapon, and weapons don’t weep. ❜
❛ you can’t save everyone. ❜
❛ it should have been you. ❜
❛ did i do good? ❜
❛ i’m sorry that i can’t save you. ❜
❛ wait for me, will you? ❜
❛ i can’t lose you again! ❜
❛ you were dead, i saw you die. ❜
❛ we won’t forget each other, right? ❜
❛ i’m real. i’m here. ❜
❛ you already know how this will end. ❜
❛ it’s always my fault, isn’t it? ❜
❛ i don’t want to go. ❜
❛ can you remember how you died? ❜
❛ i love you, but you’re not mine. ❜
❛ have you ever lost someone? ❜
❛ i didn’t ask to get made. ❜
❛ you’re as beautiful as the day i lost you. ❜
❛ i never meant to hurt you. ❜
❛ is it really you? ❜
❛ their blood is on your hands. ❜
❛ it would have been better to die. ❜
❛ i’m not ready to lose you yet. ❜
❛ i wish i met you sooner. ❜
❛ let’s just stay here. grow old. ❜
❛ you’re the first friend i ever had. ❜
❛ i told you not to fall in love with me. ❜
❛ you always push people away. i just thought you’d never do it to me. ❜
❛ everyone i’ve cared about has either died of left me. except for you. ❜
❛ i know i have a heart because i can feel it breaking. ❜
❛ they’re not coming back. ❜
❛ i’m sorry, have we met? ❜
❛ in my dreams, we’re still together. ❜
❛ you’re the one good thing left in this world. ❜
❛ i hate the way that i don’t hate you. ❜
❛ it’s okay. you can let go. ❜
❛ you mean nothing to me. ❜
❛ we’re on our own now. ❜
❛ you can’t kill me, i’m not alive. ❜
❛ it wasn’t supposed to end like this. ❜
❛ do you remember when we first met? ❜
❛ we’ll see each other again. ❜
❛ there’s nothing you could have done. ❜
❛ we did it. we won. ❜
❛ let’s not go back. not ever. ❜
❛ thanks for playing with me. ❜
❛ why does it feel like this is goodbye? ❜
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kissing starters
“ kiss me. ”
“ can't we just... make out, or something? “
“ i really want to kiss you right now. “
“ just one more... “
“ it was more of a peck... “
“ kiss me and you'll find out. “
“ i’m here for business, not pleasure. “
“ so you don’t want me to kiss you? “
“ i could kiss you for hours. “
“ how about a good night kiss? “
“ you may now kiss the bride. “
“ permission to lean in? “ “ permission granted. “
“ we should practice for our wedding day. “
“ you, me, bed, now. “
“ i want [our first kiss] to be special. “
“ i fell asleep before i could kiss you. “
“ we didn't kiss each other good morning. “
“ i’ve been wanting to kiss you for a while. “
“ kiss me, i’m miserable. “
“ who was your first kiss? “
“ did you do the laundry? “ “ yes, now where’s my kiss? “
“ if you want me to kiss you, all you have to do is ask. “
“ you’re a great kisser. “
“ with your mouth on mine, there's less bullshit coming out of it. “
“ teach me how to do it. “
“ can i get another one? “
“ every time you kiss me, i swear i'm falling even more in love with you. “
“ i haven’t mastered the art of kissing yet. “
“ wanna practice? “
“ you’re a great kisser. “
“ kiss the pain away. “
“ with your lips on mine... “
“ is there such a thing as love at first kiss? “
“ if i were to kiss someone, it would be you. “
“ you’re irresistible. ”
“ you said i had nice lips. who says that? “
“ kiss me again, but don’t stop this time. “
“ i love it when you kiss me. “
“ your kisses mean the world to me. “
“ i want you to kiss me. for real, this time. “
“ one last kiss is worth being late to work for. “
“ if you kiss me, we’re not getting out of bed today… “
“ you kissed me last night. “ “ and you didn’t stop me. “
“ no more kisses! i need to get ready for work. “
“ i really want to kiss you. “
“ it’s cute, this thing you’re doing. “ “ being all nervous? “
“ you’ve never kissed anyone before? “
“ you’re going to have to guide me through this. “
“ do i just… close my eyes and lean in? “
“ i want our first kiss to be special. “
“ [our first kiss] it's going to be magical. “
“ i kissed you. “ “ i know, i… was there. “
“ you just can’t help yourself, can you? “
“ i’ve always wondered what it would be like to kiss you. “
“ it’s just an innocent kiss. “
“ we’re friends, right? friends kiss each other all the time. “
“ people kiss each other all the time. doesn’t mean there’s feelings involved. “
“ i’m sorry for bringing it up. “ “ actually, i would love to kiss you. “
“ you mean, you and me? kissing? “
“ you’ve seriously never thought about [us kissing]? “ “ maybe once or twice. “
“ you mean us, kissing? “ “ can’t say it never crossed my mind... “
“ let’s kiss. just to see what it’s like. “
“ oh, what the hell. let’s do it. “
“ of course i'm a little curious. i've heard great things about you. “
“ all i want to do is kiss you. all day, every day. “
“ i’ve never kissed anyone before. “
“ well, if anybody were to kiss me, i would want that person to be you. “
“ you just can’t get enough of me, can you? “
“ and right now, i think you should kiss me. “
“ i’ll kiss you right now to prove i don’t feel something for you. “
“ you kissed me first. “ “ i definitely didn’t. “ “ you were literally all over me. “
“ did you just kiss me? “
“ you’re so full of shit... [if you think the kiss didn't mean something] “
“ did we just kiss? “
“ your kiss already gave you away. “
“ we don't have to do this if you don’t want to. “
“ don’t speak. just kiss me. “
“ come kiss me. “
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Poe Dameron of the Dark Side.2.0
I had painted one Tie fighter Poe some time ago, and I love this idea so much that I couldn’t control myself to draw it again. I focus on combine evil, sexy, cocky with the Poe’s natural charm.
“Do you BLEED?”
Hahahaha
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NAT’S 16TH BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION
— @zoriis asked: a certain flyboy we both love
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