cybirddoesthings
What Things? I don't know either.
30something agender fandom old puttering around forgetting to clarify that I'm not a bot for far too long.
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warrior cats designs *dies*
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spiders have got to figure out contracting I need to be able to call my local spiders union and be like "hey can you send a guy out for a few days the fruit flies are back" and then pay it in spider currency. I'll learn the conversion rates. I'll be generous with my rounding. please.
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“LOL. You think your vote matters? ROFL and LOL.” Yes, I am aware my vote carries less and less relative power the more people I’m voting with, but unlike your glorious violent revolution, it actually exists.
#There is no ethical path from the world we have to the world we want#That's why it's so important to hammer out small-scale solutions#and build coalitions to expand them#It's doubtful it will ever be ideal#but that's not an excuse not to try
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"i'm saying this and it's explicitly supported by canon" thumbs up great
"i'm saying this because it's how i want to interpret canon" cool thank you for being clear that it's your own interpretation, that's rad!
"i'm saying this, and i know it's not canon or even related, but i just like it and want to talk about it" again, rad! thank you for acknowledging it's not related to canon, glad you're having fun.
"i'm saying this is canon because i want it to be canon but it is not at all what actually happened" okay so you see that's just lying
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please spread this so that it can actually be funny instead of just 1 person voting
#okay I don't have a lot of reach but I think I need to spread this a little#because it desperately needs people to vote for literally anything except chimney#we want a house not a barley contained fireplace people
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characters said this is my story and i get to choose the actions
#I have never written a TMA fic where he appeared in which Martin Blackwood did not do this to me#even my RPs of him he's just like this#like it's bad enough I almost wanna ask Jonny if he ever had this problem with Martin writing the original work!
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#had to think about this for way too long#but it was a Christian end-times movie#The Thief in the Night#To this day the sound a landline makes if it's left off the hook for too long puts my teeth on edge#and I have a weird complex about being left unexpectedly alone
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Made this poll because I miss Champagne Video, my favorite video rental place. Your loss would be easier to bear if you hadn't been replaced with a waxing parlor.
#back when it was VHS tapes it was a tiny place called Popcorn Video#where every video rental came with a bag of popcorn#and there was a little hotdog stand attached to the store that had the best hot dogs I've ever had to this day#But as the changeover to DVDs happened and Popcorn didn't update their stock...#well... Blockbuster was there#Blockbuster was where I learned about Binging TV Shows#most people credit Netflix with that but for me it was Blockbuster#Renting Six Feet Under an Entire Season at a Time messed me up in ways that still impact me to this day
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I started thinking about what each character from Our Flag Means Death would be the god of if they were gods, so...
Stede Bonnet: God of "the little things". He's the god to thank for the tiny details that add up to make life worth living. The god of stopping to smell the roses. The god of finding comfort in the things that make you happy. A god of joy and of hope. A non-violent god. A nurturer at his core. He is the breeze through your hair and the satisfaction of a job well done. He is the warmth of a partner beside you when you wake up in the morning and the taste of your tea at just the right temperature
Edward Teach: A god of change. Represented by the sea: always in motion, always unpredictable, always pushing and pulling in intense ways. The god of extremes: both good and bad. A god of intense emotions and stormy seas. A god of passion and desperation and the desire to reach up and meet the sun. God of the horizon: where the sea meets the sky. God of smooth sailing and of journeys. He's the god of the person you've become once the journey is done. He is the god of progress and of healing, protector of those who look in the mirror and no longer recognize the stranger who stares back at them.
Izzy Hands: The god of misplaced loyalty. God of unhealthy devotion. He is the god of blind love and all that implies. God of those blind to the suffering they cause others in the name of love and of those blind to their own suffering at the hands of those they love. He is the protector of children whose cries go unheard by parents who don't want them and the voice of lovers who get trapped in the same toxic cycles. He is the desperate reaching of hands begging to be held that are denied touch
Buttons: God of transformation. He is the god of an open-mind. He is the waves that crash upon the beaches and the seagulls who make their nests by the sea. He is yearning. He is the feeling of homesickness for a place you've never known. He is friends made in unlikely places and community found in isolation. He is the patron of long distance relationships, of the intense yearning to be with someone you can't touch. He is the belief that you will be held in the embrace of what you love
Frenchie: God of belief. He is the god of harmless superstition and ritual. The god of luck, both good and bad. He is the god of believing in what you can not prove to be true. The god of faith: faith in people and faith in himself. He is the believer. He is trust. He is the betrayal of that trust. He is manipulation and schemes and lies, but he is the love of the game. A trickster god who doubles as protector. He is unseen truths
Roach: God of meals. He is the god of sharing. The god of breaking bread with friends or strangers. The god of offering a helping hand. He is the god of laughter and of warmth. The god of house parties and of the intimacy of a home-cooked offering on a date. God of bake sales and of bringing people together. He is the god of community
Jim Jimenez: They are the god of the rejection of fate. The god of choosing your own destiny and creating your own path. God of rejection of the life others planned for you, the breaker of cycles. They are every child who rejected their parents' dreams and they are every person who turned their back on revenge. They are the protector of all who reject the concept of fate and inevitably
Oluwande Boodhari: The god of compassion. He is a hand extended to someone you don't understand. He is conversation rather than violence. He is the choice to try to know someone rather than write them off. He is the protector of the unheard and the unseen. He is unrequited love and he is everyone who searches for a friend. He is home in other people and the feeling of safety from a hug from a friend
Wee John Feeney: Goddess of fire and passion. He is the goddess of creativity and desire, the god of being more than what's expected of you. He is the god of inspiration, of when you create and can't stop making up new ideas. He is a mind overflowing with thoughts and the burning warmth of success. He is every project that people have started in excitement. Every work in progress is inspired by him
Lucius Spriggs: The god of artistic expression. He is all pieces of trauma art, of venting through the page what you can't speak aloud. He is a portrait of a lover painted only the way someone who loves them could. He is the creation of something to bring out the feelings inside that can not be expressed in any other way. He is all love songs and all stories from someone who used metaphor to unravel their feelings
Black Pete: God of stories and exaggeration. He is the god of the feeling of inadequacy when looking up to someone you admire. The desire to be respected and the desperation to be loved. He is the tiny white lies everyone tells now and again. He is compliments to make others feel good no matter their sincerity. He is friendship and joy in knowing parts of someone they want to be known. He is campfire tales and stories around the dinner table. He is legend and myth that ties people together
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You're given two job offers. You can only accept one, and you can't get a second job or a have side hustle.
The first offer is your dream job, your passion project doing what you love, the career you've always wanted more than anything else, the job you would sell your soul to be able to have. However, you will never make enough to support yourself, and you'll be completely reliant on government assistance.
The second offer is to sit in an empty room naked Monday through Friday, eight hours a day. The only details you're given are that you are allowed to bring entertainment, and you get a break for lunch. The job pays one million dollars (or whatever the equivalent would be where you live) per month.
#I mean I already sit around naked all day anyway#I'm not really seeing the catch for the second offer?#unless that's suppose to read *Can't* bring entertainment?#I would get so much of my podcast backlog listened to...#and that kind of paycheck? Please#I make it two months and I'm set for life
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QUICK. RB THIS WITH THE FIRST SONG LYRIC THAT COMES TO YOUR HEAD WHEN YOU SEE THIS POST. THAT IS AN ORDER
#congratulations on chasing away every single song I've ever heard in my life#took me over a whole minute to get *anything* playing in my head#ended up being-#'Take me to Church I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies'
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Look at this wikipedia article and tell me..
#there were only two years in the 1980s that the goat survived#I was born in one of them#wild#...also in the first year that there was gambling about the fate of the goat#appparently
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When I was in High School, I was in a production of The Music Man. Just a random pick-a-little lady, but one of our performances, I want to say either the Friday or Saturday night performance? Was going *horribly*. People were forgetting lines, a stage hand wandered on stage mid-scene carrying a bench for the next, and about a dozen other things I don't remember. Nothing the Audience was terribly pressed about but we all were terrified that Act I was a total bust.
Sometime around intermission, a then-friend of mine began speculating that he could make our Bad Luck "So Much Worse" and wondered "How Much Worse" he could make it. At this point, he began quietly chanting the name of the Scottish Play under his breath all the way up until his next scene.
Guys.
Act II went off without a hitch.
This made me more superstitious about it then ever. You Can't Use a Curse on Purpose
girl I would kill myself if I did that lol
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Okay but what if Guillermo *seems* to be having that boom of energy. He's insisting he's fine, he's doing anything and everything and filled with activity but not giving any real response to anyone other then to report what he's gotten accomplished or insist he's fine.
Cut to Colin Robinson trying to drain him, then reporting to the cameras that "I can't drain him, there's nothing there."
Honestly if S6 doesn't start with Guillermo bearded long haired and depressive than what are we doing anyways?
S6 opening: Nandor talking to the cameras "after the last events" cuts to scenes of s5 ending "Guillermo is a little... More pathetic than he already was."
Laszlo: the boy's having a crisis
Cuts to Guillermo sadly eating tortillas while bundled up in a blanket repeating "what I'm doing with my life what I'm doing with my life what I'm doing with my life" while watching some bad reality TV
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Another factor I can't stop thinking about is how the narrative seemed to expect us to not have expected Lucius back after S1, and how the foreshadowing of Izzy's death throughout S2 echoes the foreshadowing to Lucius' death in season 1.
Nearly dying in a horrifying incident involving amputation, remarks about what sort of significance their death or survival would have for the crew as a whole ("bad for morale" vs "indestructible little fucker") even the fact that there was behind the scenes footage of Lucius having a second near death experience in S2 that was cut, bringing us back to a Rule-of-Three that I've seen talked about in reference to Izzy's Death.
It's another fake-out, guys. Just a less obvious one this time because of how well we all saw through the Lucius fake-out.
Reasons I think Izzy Hands is not dead, or at the very least will not stay dead if we get a season 3:
He wasn't buried at sea; what was that about? Instead he's on land, right beside Stede and Ed's home, with all of his effects handy: his ring, his prosthetic leg, his cravat.
David Jenkins has been consistently vocal about how much he loves Izzy and Con, how integral Izzy is to the show, and how Izzy's arc is tied to Ed and Stede's. He has even gone so far to say, in direct response to fans' anguish over Izzy's death, that there is no version of this show that exists without Izzy Hands.
Season 2 solidified that there is magic in this universe, specifically magic related to death and transformation.
Season 2 also established the gravy basket as a place between life and death where lessons can be learned to catalyze positive transformation and growth in the visitor.
Izzy is literally described as an indestructible little fucker after surviving a gunshot to the head earlier in the season. It would be kinda wild for a gunshot to the abdomen to be the thing that kills him off for good after that.
He is also described as a unicorn, which while not immune to death by injury, is generally understood in myth to be an immortal creature associated with healing, that is also supposed to be notoriously difficult to capture or kill.
Izzy's arc, like Ed's and Stede's, is still unresolved. We see him struggling throughout the season even though he is also improving. We see him refusing to acknowledge what really happened to him. We see him blaming himself for things that are not his fault. And none of these issues are resolved by the end of the season. All prime lessons for the gravy basket to teach.
Death has repeatedly been used as a vehicle of transformation on the show, particularly for Ed and Stede who, as we know, are tied with Izzy in the show's arc and symbolism (our 3 mythical creatures).
Izzy himself and his arc are tied to what piracy means and symbolizes within the show. If the show isn't done with piracy (and I'm sure it isn't), it likely isn't done with Izzy.
Okay this one is out there but stay with me: the last shot we see of Ed and Stede fades to the background for a close-up of Izzy's grave. The grave is marked with a cross. Yes, this is a common grave marker. But it also stands out as a bit odd given there's no evidence that Izzy or the people closest to him have any truck with the religion it's typically associated with, in which it's a symbol of what? Resurrection. So who is that for? Is it just visual shorthand for a grave? Well, they could have used a painted sign or even a roughly carved stone. So could it be significant that they chose a symbol of resurrection and transformation to mark his grave?
At the very end of that shot, a seagull--very likely Buttons in his own transformed state--lands on the cross, further tying the last image of "Izzy" we see to the show's expanded mythos of magic, purgatory, and transformation.
Do any of these things mean definitively that Izzy will be back? No. I'm just speculating here. But I do find it very interesting and at least somewhat compelling when you put them all together.
(I have also not yet abandoned the idea that Roach managed to save Izzy after he passed out and his funeral was an elaborate fuckery.)
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