i know that "unalive" is part of larger worrying trend of self censorship but if you really are in a situtation where you have to avoid the words "die" or "kill" the english language already has centuries worth of much better euphemisms. the iconic and perennial "six feet under"? the lovely imagery of "pushing up daisies"? "shuffle off this mortal coil"????? literally anything from the monty python dead parrot bit???? you have so many options. please try to be more creative at least

you know how sometimes you see a shape from a distance and hope it's a cat or other small pettable animal. but it turns out to be just a plastic bag or something. well that's sort of what just happened to me, except for some reason i decided it must be a gargoyle statue someone had decided to abandon on the side of the road. so i think i may have just had a truly unique human experience.

Chuck Jones is the best counterexample to “the curtains are just blue” because you would not believe the amount of thought and art theory he put into his silly little cartoons

Pets love to show up like Hello i am Mystery Wet :)

tiktok is such an awful app, it's almost designed to feed you misinformation and expose you to insane discourse. unlike beloved tumblr, the app that feeds me misinformation and exposes me to insane discourse

“to be a woman is to experience pain”“to be a woman is to perform”“to be a woman is to-” SHUT UP SHUT UP 💥💥💥💥

honestly dni and unfollow me if you support mama after all she's done. she literally has consulted medical professionals over and over and refused to change her behavior re: those under her care. she LITERALLY called the doctor, MORE THAN ONCE, and the doctor very fucking clearly said no more monkeys jumping on the bed. and what happens five fucking seconds later every single time

worst part about getting angry is how much it makes you want to be mean

Little fucking guy alert!!

Bothering the beast

The Beast that Bothers

Finally bought some good china

i dont want any more emails

[Disney movie protagonist voice] yep, that's me. I'm nothing special, just your average 15-year-old. my best friend, though... that's a different story.

[cut to waterlogged corpse]

Journey to the men's washroom

English added by me :)