New jobs are fun because you’re asking questions like ummmmm how do you open. A door

after 11 tabs, 2 video essays, 6 hours of chatting on discord, 4 meals, 7 zone-out sessions, 4 doodle pages, 2 illustrations, 10 hours of twitter scrolling, 3 hour naps, 1 DnD session, 7 hours of tumblr scrolling, 15 hours of switching between social medias, 5 youtube videos about my hyperfixation, 2 hours of wikipedia hopping, 4 mental breakdowns, 3 hours of make-up, 9 hours of outfit wearing, and 12 old youtube videos, I FINALLY finished my 5 minute homework! ^_^

Pedestrian affirmations:

YOU ARE INVINCIBLE

AUTOMOBILES TREMBLE AT THE SIGHT OF YOU

GOD'S DIVINE LIGHT SHIELDS YOU

CROSSWALKS ARE YOUR HOLY PATH TO SALVATION

It's still kinda wild how Phineas and Ferb managed to completely hijack an idiom. Now whenever someone hears a sentence leading with "If I had a nickel for everytime [...]", odds are their brain auto fills with "I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice," rather than "I'd be rich," or "I could [action that requires purchasing something requiring an obscene amount of money]". Y'know, what the idiom originally was

At the gate for my flight home from visiting friends and there's a woman here with a service Shiba Inu. No pics because he has a Do Not Disturb vest and taking pics of strangers is illegal but I need to stress how ON DUTY this animal is. Ears up. Eyes doing Lazer scans of everything. Examining everyone who passes within 10ft like a security guard. Ass planted on her feet. I have never seen a dog with such intense chivalric guardian energy before. He has tiny eyebrows and they are FURROWED with concentration.

Day 27 watch out I’m coming!

im jesus

Test

"You Have Succeeded Your Task"

Hi i wanted to share this fucking insane moment I read today

dentists will splash some water in your mouth and youll think "oh a nice drink of water i was parched" just for them to suck it back out with their wretched little tube. disingenuous behavior

Hey. That was fun. Lets play together in the next life, too :3

misc doodles because i must draw in a different style every 6 seconds

Since Tumblr won't let me reblog the post with this genocidal bitch's info here you go