cibophobiacinhe11
cibophobiac
23 y/o, he/they, tw ed/ocd/vent, 18+, pls read pinned post
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I really need help, is there anyone I can text for accountability? I need someone to text to help me distract me from binging.
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots
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Discord keeps t wording any server. Does anyone wanna make a gc on insta or sc?
In need of a wl buddy or a gc or SOMETHING toxic non toxic idc we can help each other <3
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I’ve been sticking to my plan pretty well this week. Staying below a certain amount of calories. Walking 3 miles a day. I ate this morning cause I was feeling weird though. I’m tryin to not eat anymore until tonight. I need to stay under 800 max. It’s like I opened the flood gates. Now I want more food. I should have waited.
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts
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The wedding is still on I’ve just got a lot of reassurance to do on my part and I’ve got to get mentally prepared to go through hell aka forced recovery. But for now I’m still gonna go on my silly little walks to keep my brain feeling balanced and restrict my silly little food so that im either maintaining or losing.
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ftm ed#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️goals#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts
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Yesterday I walked 4.5 miles and had 680 cals.It was a rollercoaster. It felt good staying in my calorie zone and walking. But then I came home and my fiancé found my meal/exercise plan and accused me of being pro&na. She doesn’t know if she wants to have the wedding until after I get help. If I don’t recover I’ll lose her. If we have to postpone the wedding it’ll be super embarrassing. I screwed up by accidentally letting her see my meal plan. But I’m not proana. I’m not fatphobic. I’m disordered with distorted thoughts and I can’t tell what’s healthy or disordered.
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts
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I’m gonna lose it if I don’t get back on track.
Like seriously I know it’s so close to my wedding only two month. If I don’t lose 20 pounds or start to see progress towards losing 20 pounds. I might have to seriously consider a secret p5ychw4rd visit.
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts
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This week’s meal & exercise plan
4/2: 11am Walk 4.5-6 miles, 5pm dinner - veggie pasta (400), cheese and broccoli (120), 2 fiber one brownie (140)
4/3: 10am walk 6 miles, 1pm picnic with siblings, 5pm dinner - spinach ravioli (250), 2 fiber brownies (140)
4/4: 11am walk 6 miles, 5pm dinner- chicken, mashed potatoes & gravy (220), 5 pc broccoli (100), 2 fiber brownies (140), macaroni & cheese (220)
4/5: 11am walk 6 miles, 5pm dinner - Amy’s cheddar broccoli pasta meal (460) garlic & cheese bread 210, fiber one brownie (70)
4/6: 11am walk 6 miles, 5pm dinner - cheese enchiladas (300), spicy chips (150), 2 fiber one brownies
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️goals#🫧⭐️thoughts
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April Goals
Lose 8-10 pounds
Walk 4 times a week, 3-6 miles each day
Calories per day 575-775
Fast 23 hours each day
Plan exercise and meals
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️thoughts#🫧⭐️goals
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Good morning ☀️ I went from 125 on Monday to 115 today I think I’m back on track
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts
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It’s been extremely hard to fast for longer than 20 hours a day living with my fiancé. I feel like I’m failing. I’ve been atleast able to stay under 800 cals.
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts
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My fiancé feels like they’re gonna be the f@t 🐋 at the wedding since I’m still not recovered I feel like shit for making them feel that way. But I’m very triggered by the wedding too. She also wants me to go to residential and if we have to reschedule the wedding then we will. But that would be SO embarrassing to have to cancel the wedding. I want to get better I’m tired of living like this and being scared to eat all the time. But idk if I’m ready to give up the control.
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts
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Starting to think I have a mixture of bed and @n@ with a side of arfid and orthorexia.
This shit sucks
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts
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This is the last day I’m telling myself,
“I can start over tomorrow”
I’m starting today and I won’t give up!
Plans for the next two weeks
GW: 92lbs 7/15/24
03/26- Fast, starts 6:30pm
03/27- Fast, Walk 3 miles
03/28- Fast, Walk 3 miles
03/29- Fast ends 6pm, starts at 6:30pm, 500 cal limit, Walk 3 miles
03/30- Fast
03/31- Fast, Walk 3 miles, Weigh in
04/01- Fast ends at 6pm starts at 6:30pm, 500 cal limit, Walk 3 miles
04/02- Fast, walk 3 miles
04/03- Fast
04/04- Fast ends at 6pm, starts at 6:30pm, 500 cal limit, walk 3 miles
04/05- Fast, walk 3 miles
04/06- Fast, walk 3 miles
04/07- Fast ends at 6pm starts at 6:30pm, 500 cal limit, weigh in
#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts#🫧⭐️foodjournal#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots
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Literally what is wrong with me all I can think about is food all I want to do is eat and that shit is scaring me. My distraction list isn’t helping.
#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts#trans ana#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#⭐️ve#ed moots#ana moots
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screaming and crying, TMI but I haven’t been able to pass a bm since last Tuesday or Wednesday. I stepped on the scale and it said 122lbs. I’m really hoping that most of that is because I haven’t been able to go. Because I’ve been eating less I should atleast be maintaining and not gaining.
#🫧⭐️venting#🫧⭐️thoughts#tw ana diary#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#⭐️ving#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#4n0r3xia
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Question for those that smoke nic and use vapes…
Will a vape really help suppress appetite? Would it be worth it to buy a vape? I’m about to start doing longer fasts and I really need help curving my appetite.
#tw ana diary#not in recovery#pro for me not for thee#trans ana#⭐️ving#ed trans#ftm ed#@nor3×14#ed ftm#4n0r3xia#i need to ⭐️ve#⭐️rving#i want to ⭐️ve#⭐️ve#⭐️rve#i wanna ⭐️ve
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